Baby

I am absolute poetry in motion

Someday's
Its pretty and neat
Simple and sweet

Other's
We're an utter wreck
Misunderstood, broken
Screeching all around nonsense to any ear open
Manic mayhem


Yet everyday
I still sit to say

I am absolute poetry in motion

The poems
The bees
The happy days
Sunshine within the rain

Its those kind of things
The things that make our souls sing

Its worth the sight

Please weather the fight

Its my mindstate
Which decides my life's fate
Most

I love being blinded by these bright flowers

I know I don't call
I had to give you distance

I still pray for you at night
Your family is still here

I gotta do whats best for her and I
Even if it hurts

Whyd you have to get strung out

You deserve more than what they gave you
You deserve more than what you think you deserve

The third eye
Shall never lie

For intuition
Could be ones higher self coming to fruition

I wanna feel loveable

But now everything's less trustable

So I shell up

Uncrustable

These new little eyes
A brand new way to see life

Finally
    a brand new way
        to precieve this world

She makes magic happen

Wow I'm a *******

Take a breath

This is not death
Its only a test

So don't stress
Simply try your best

On life's test
And take a breath

I give more than i receive

Oh yes
Hes such a yellow fella

Alone
My aim is at some throne
Maybe itll be in Rome
Perhaps ill finally find my home

I almost died today.

I also learned something about myself.

I love who i am so much.

Sometimes i wonder if it's the fact i have faced death multiple times that I'm able to react the way i do?
Every time though, i just know God is with me because honestly you guys i have no logical explanation how im sitting here typing this.

I held on to that.
But I never found my soul in that.

I can't hold onto that.
So I found my soul in straps.

Real tough guy act.
When, I feel alone in fact.

Oh whatd id give to be a piece of art work upon the wall

Sometimes i wonder if you still come to sit and read me

If so
I watch every sunset
I imagine
Bryce is here and
Im pregnant still
Just us on the rocky stubby driveway
Under one of the most beautiful skys ive ever seen...

No ones topped you.

Id like to just go a head
Take a moment to apologize

I hear people speak about these things i deal with
They say its all mental and so are we

I'm sorry I'm damaged
Im sorry I'm still learning how to communicate and manage myself and emotions.

I don't meant to be like this.

It is who I am but I pray its not my definition.

My guts miss you

Its truly baffling
One day you cant stay above the water
Then you understand you've been able to breath
That you arent in water at all
Never were.

Its more like being in flight.
You can breathe now
Finally able to grow fond of the sights.

Raging hostility
Impeccable deflection
Things alike and similar
Seems to reside near unaccountability
Unwillingness to see the owns reflection
Sometimes all this can seem like a two headed snake
As if you've been abandoned in midsts of war
Its a spiritual battle; one which satan cant shake
An anointing humility
A higher self connection

I wish you saw me
As he do
A long suffering
Your doings

In order to break the cycle
You have to be willing to be called crazy
To be told you are making a huge mistake
They tell you this
They make you feel it
You'll question yourself
But in the end
Your the cycle breaker not them
Don't expect them to understand your message
They don't know what you're after

A love so deep
It takes my soul away
A hill so steep
Life left us in dismay
I can't breathe
A lovely home turned disarray
Take heed
You never needed it anyway

Temporary

As everything is
  Hell always has been

A **** ton of
Would haves
could haves  
      
          Sell outs
Has been



Hell, I say
Who gives a **** what we are anymore
I'll stay raisin my bottles until my liver gives out

Ive heard people speak of how angry the other got
What the other did

That *** for tat type ****

But I swear
I've never heard someone speak on the hurt that was there
Do they tell you about the one on one conversations

Sometimes I wonder if some people ever sit alone enough with their own thoughts to replay those..

I'm honestly just mad at myself
Becuz I cannot bring myself to hold that on you.

I'm spiraling
Oh darling

Why can't you see
I gave you all of me

Written in stone
So concrete
You have left me deceased

I do not regret holding it down for you

I do not regret any choice I made for you

My loyalty for you still stands

Just with different terms now
I can hear it in your voice when you call
I can see it in all the **** you do

You lost and the decision cost it all


You did what you did
I feel what I feel
But my heart so big man

Aint a soul walking i got ill wishes on
Not even you

Its time for me to wake up though
It's a lot of real bad people
Its a lot of real sick people
I can't help people

Sometimes you gotta tuck them emotions
Its still all love just from a distance

How vile
We could have been amazing
Looking at that unshaven
Needing a manscape
Innocent face
All my mind can play is that day
Me sitting on the tail end of his truck
You with that red mustang
And the undeniable fire that raged
Once our lips met
We could have been great
If only life would have let us

Please share your love with yourself.

You probably need it the most.