Please tell me what I've done
is it my name
is it my hard
I'm sorry it's not like yours
I'm sorry it's different
I've tried hard
to be like all of you
that maybe one day
I'll walk with all of you
but I've worked so hard
done so much
and I'm still no closer to heaven
nowhere close to heaven
maybe.
just maybe
I can go back to sleep
Please, let me sleep.

"I forgot about my blood"
Whispered under breath
with eyes quaking
skin laced with sweat
grime
breaths deep and labored
surrounded by white
tiled walls
painted with crimson brush strokes
of tattered knuckles
"I swear, I really forgot"

People ask me
where I get the courage
to do the things I do
like jump down 5 flights of stairs
or juggle knives
or run through rush hour traffic
but they don't know
That I wouldn't mind
if things went wrong
sometimes

**I hope they do

The world is at its end
I see the ocean at my window
Maria Cristina sputters her last of tears

I have no more to give.