Wind blows
    a leaf falls

Lazily down
                      down
                              and
                                    down

Autumn's cold
is here

Like Alice down the rabbit hole.

There comes a time when it has to stop. Just. Stop. But that time is a long way off I fear. It’s further and farther yet to fall. This never-ending tunnel of life, of things grabbing you in the dark, secrets spilled and truths taking hold. Like a sesame seed trying to sprout in mud. It’s bigger than a mustard seed, but it isn’t moving a mountain anytime soon.

Have I lost faith? Is that what this sickness is? Just a complete lack of faith, of understanding, or will? The willingness to go on dragging one foot in front of the other is there, but barely. Steps range from shambling stumbles to jarring, ragged limps. But still it’s pulling along. One foot ****** from too deep mud, placed with a squelching sound ahead again, as the hungry earth tries so hard to drag you down; to keep you here, entombed and sinking. Until the bog takes over and the air can no longer hear your screams.

This is life.

I always wanted to be a dancer,
but life had other plans.
Dancing still brings me joy,
still thrills me to watch
The cut of a dancer's line,
the intention in their sole --
Moving
with such joy,
such sadness.
Conveying every emotion
known to man
with the point of a toe
and the sweep of an arm.
The freedom of movement
Strength
Grace
Precision
I still wish I'd been a dancer
...
It's never too late to start.

life flows like a river
But eventually,
we all come to a waterfall

And when the bottom drops out
we come crashing down below,
sure we're crushed by the weight
of the Waters,
of Life

Surfacing into the chaos,
into the calm,
always surprised
and gasping our first breath
as if we're back from the dead
-- but we're not

We float,  full on the idea
that death did not take us
life's grasp not relinquished

Do we rejoice; cry?
frustration and joy mingle --

we float on,
drag ourselves to shore
Knowing full well
we'll have to cross that river again.

Breathe.
Eyes closed; In, out, in
Sigh a heady breath --

And begin again.

Bleed me 'til I cry
Bleed until my emotions dry
Just a cut
Surface, skin
It's how I feel
Without/ within

Just a split
Let them out
These things that crawl
Beneath my flesh
My soul, like tar
Buried deep
Trapped upon their tiny feet
Six by six
Six
Again

Each emotion
Grown legs and given rise
Slipping from my fingered grasp
Crawling, creeping
Across my thighs
High,
And high,
And high

Until this skin
This split, divide
Recedes with time
Feelings ride back,
And back,
And down

As one-by-one
My cells are knit
And once again
It's time
To bleed
To bleed
To bleed me dry.

There's a dinosaur in my washing machine,
having himself a bath.
There's a Brontosaurs in my refrigerator,
having himself a snack.
The Raptor in the rec room is just
romping round the ground.

There's a pony parading through the puddin',
A stallion on the stove.
There's horse in my hamper,
wrinkling all the clothes.

A duck went down the drain today,
while emptying the tub.
The cat is on the keyboard,
asking for a hug.

You might think my menagerie strange,
But you don't know the half –
That's just the animals,
who've given you a laugh.
 
There's a truck in the toilet,
a tractor on the bed,
and a big, pink convertible,
parked upon its head.
I found an airplane in my dishwasher
and a copter in the cupboard.
The books are in the broom closet,
The brooms are on the lawn.
Socks are on the front porch
Waiting for summer to come.
 
If this all seems crazy to you,
I'll guess that you don't know
the joy it is to have this mess
If you've not yet 
been blessed... 
'Cause sleeping in the car
Are toddlers two, and three.

04/02/2019
~MRC

I have an extensive dilemma
Wherein
There’s modest prospect
That dictates obtaining in-depth qualifications
Worthiness to ensure the origination
Seeking nominal negative backlash
In the realm of traditional obligations

Life is a collection of Post-it Notes
Tiny pieces of paper
making up the collage of my mind.
These days though--
I'm not sure how well the glue is holding
The stickiness is starting to fail
The constant removal,
Rearrangement
Each note's move
Changes the picture,
Changes who I am.

When at last those squares
refuse to stick
Notes come tumbling down
Falling like rainbow colored rain
A final flood of memories --
Then ...
My mind's awash
Thoughts all a- jumble
A gentle breeze,
forceful as a hurricane
Comes to blows the bits away
Post-its scatter like leaves in the wind

All that's left
Is this blank yellow square
Longing to be writ
Once more

What reward awaits beyond
What lights shine upon the soul
Those who've suffered long?

Now gone,
Are you running free?
While we grieve, saddened
Crying tears we never let you see

In your place, a candle shines -- but
It will never burn as bright
As the light in your eyes

May you be at rest,  now
Peacefully
Forever

Potholes overflow
with rain.  F L O W I N G
                            Toward
                               the Great Lakes ... inland sea

I'm like a spider's web
Spun from finest silk
My strength
Unmatched
until Man comes along
He shakes me down
Brushes me off
and
Walks
Right
Through

Shaking lips and hips, hands
fingers refuse to move
my feet -- like glue
like I'm the Rat
in a trap
You bowled me over
Shook me up
and plowed right
Through

but in the end
It was just
a kiss to you.

Trip the rift
the great divide
In your head
you cannot hide

Blue and Black
and...
Turpentine

But, this you can't erase--
Oil stains the canvas deep.

First snowfall
drifting down
over fallen leaves
covering the world
outside my window
in a blanket of white
saying "Shhh... hush
now. It's time for the
Earth to rest."
I'll keep her safe
frozen in time
until she can
begin anew
in Spring.

Do you ever feel
you're drowning
and that hand
You thought
was coming
to help...

It pushes you down
Instead.

...and I feel guilty
because I climbed
into that backseat...

And closed the door.

Who the ****
Do you think you are
To go around telling lies?

You use my lips,
My eyes,
My thighs,
Put on a bold new show.

But all it does
Is bring me down
Where's the sparkle --
where's the shine?

Nothing but pretty lies
And uglier truths
Escaping from the stage.

My heart cries --
But you'll never see the tears.

I am not your **** toy
Not a plastic doll
Your fantasies
Don't get to come
True on my account
These aren't your fun bags
My *** is not to smack

My skin longs
For the touch of fingertips
But crawls at the thought
Bristle before, relax
Never knowing
What unwanted touch
Is coming next

Never knew to say no
Never knew wrong was wrong
Until it was all too late

Doctor in the barn
Damaged on the trail
Grabbed my wrist -- was I wrong?
Drank it all away
Faded into blackness
Forcing through the door

Older now
Learning once again
They only want one thing from you;
You're just a last resort
So feign for their attention
Gave as good as got
Dove right down that rabbit hole
Trying to drown it out

And still -- trapped, touched
Touche
But then again, and "No"
That famous word
So infamously hard to hear

Too ashamed to fight back
Give in
Then
Live in
FEAR

Let me say again
Because it bears repeating:
Give in, then
Live in fear
Bare --
Repeating

R-A-P-E
Say it with me now
Such an ugly word
How does it make you feel

Do you feel ashamed
Are you feeling scarred
Do you feel her fear
Or is it not so clear?
Do you feel
Powerful now
Or is it
All her fault

Such an ugly word
So,  say it with me now
R-A-P-E
Found out what it means to me.

Patience little girl
Tedium bludgeons me here
Waiting in nature's patient grave
Lost among the roots and worms

My joy is killed here
Upon the leaves and frost
Of the forest floor

One drip of red
Standing crimson
Against the autumn hues
Stains last thoughts
Burning images in the aftermath
The media's watchful eye

She screamed here --
But it's silent in my head

Flocks take flight
The sound of the shot
Reverberations echo long

Stars spin
Eyes blur
Last gasping breath, escape
Saliva strand,
stained and dripping strings
The vibrancy of life
Departs

Silent now

Falling
With the leaves and
Flakes of first snow

Kneel or don't
Stand if you please
But won't
Once a sign
R E S P E C T
when was it taken awry?

All it takes is one
One
Bad apple spoils the bunch
One
Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

They say time flies
But not fast enough
Remembering hurt
We've never felt

Only when generations
Lost in time
Can tie their binds
To that time
Will we begin to remember
To forget
Not forgotten
Just scarred.

As flesh heals
And wounds bleed no more
Will we, as a Nation,
Come together
And stand as one
Indivisible
Against all odds.

And no One
Shall be
ONE.
We all,
Our whole...

I wish
This peace should come
In my time
But all
Will be
A memory
Of dust.

sadness floods my heart
Panic grips my wounded soul
tears flow,  breathe,  let go.

Brick-and-mortar stacked
the strength of our past
shape of our future

Beauty in the rubble
city of broken dreams
stands poised
for futures present

Rich history, success
but not for all
some lie broken
strewn about the empty lots

Paint speaks of new times
a new era of life
still fighting strife
on every street corner
every broken block
every burned, boarded Factory

Fear has made its home here
but we must drive it out
we must see it through
those of us that live here still

We want to breed success here
in these beautiful bricks
and boarded-up windows

Want to see life grow
neighborhoods thrive
and children
laughing in the streets

These things speak to us
as we roam about
lost
among the bricks and mortar
The beautiful past

Detroit

88 books
A work in progress
Candle flames dance
To the beat,  the rhythm
Of life
And down-tempo jazz

Trip-hop
Casts a soundtrack
On my day
Absorbed in sound
I lay

A cloud of sage
Smokey, white
To cleanse away my pain
I drift through thoughts
Time,  refrain

Just to be
At peace
Alive

No tears
Just joy
remembering
who I am

Still a pup, I  growled
            Life foreign Society
howled back she said -- grow

M one and M two
     sitting
               striving
                            seeking
                                         words
         Writer's life for us

I knew something was wrong
but made believe,
told myself it'd be okay

Until it wasn't

And you're not gone,
just getting far away
a fading light

Among a sea of stars

Sunsets on the waters
walks along the marsh,
a history made of art

My heart and soul

A life well lived,
a family well loved
my hero, truly I

Will love you forever.

It's 8:11 am, and I feel hollow.
I don't know why there is a hole in my psyche, my heart, my soul.
This feeling  of unrest and unbalance
Like something is missing
Empty.

I worry, I wonder,  and I hope
I hope my fears are unfounded
I hope against hope that my loved ones are safe.
I have a stirring,  a tingle
I dread being right, but know someday
That day will come.

That day when I'll have to say goodbye.
To someone I love
Someone I admire
Someone I trust
And that future hurts my heart
And leaves me bare.

I have the feeling
This hollow
A void I hope to fill with light.
But now,
Just for now
I'm empty.

...and nobody lived.
The end.

A dappling sunlight
Shadows play across my soul
Furrowed brow, release

Now I lay me down to rest
On a bed of moss
The forest floor

I hear the restless sounds of earth
The flit of wings on high
The click of things that crawl

I call out with my heart
In my mind
I fly