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21/6/2025

I don't write when iam happy
Joy makes me dance,not think
It fills my hands with flowers
Not pens.

But sadness?
She sits me down,
Open my chest,
And spills the ink.

I have all this love
And nowhere to put it
It's rotting inside me
Soft,warm
Unspent.

I reach out in dreams
But wake up alone
His name buried in my throat
Like a secret
I was not allowed to say.

He didn't stay
But the love did
And now it grows wild
Inside a heart
With no one left
To give it to.

our time together
has drawn to a close

you have had
your fair share

and i mine
there were fair moments

when i was soft
with sorrow

hard
with loss

but there are many feathers in a wing
and you may have only one

it is time to find my way
through the sky now blue

before i am done
i must make my own path

to the resting sun

Freedom is what I gained
After months in therapy
Days filled with tears
Days filled with fear
Broken is what she said
Impossible
Unfixable
No belief
Think
Reframe
Rearrange
There is no magic fix
No cure
Not 100 percent
Hard work
Resilience
Much effort it takes
Get what you put in
Up to you they say
It really is possible
Keep up the work
Keep it all in your head
Don’t forget the work you did
Because it saved me
And it may save another too

I sit there in my room each night
Wondering if this is what life is supposed to feel like

In my room, I cry alone
Just wishing I was ever known

I sit there on my comforting little bed
My safe place, crying till my eyes get red

I have a family, friends and more
But feel like i'm locked in a cage behind my door

I sit there on my bed every night
Just praying for me to feel alright

I put a smile for everyone there
Pushing down this feeling of despair

What’s life is like for others, I wonder every night
Just dreaming, in my bed, trying to feel alright

I sit there in my room each night
Wondering if this is what life is supposed to feel like