I woke up another year older, but I can’t say another year wiser, why? Because I still miss you, with every fiber of my being. Every 11:11 or birthday wish is just for you to come back. I keep dreaming you’re standing there with open arms and when I run into them it feels like home. I find myself lying to everyone, but most importantly me! Lying and telling everyone I’m over you and I don’t miss you. I keep thinking about the last time I saw you, I can still hear your laugh and see your face. We didn’t know it would be our last night together, but **** I wish I did. I would have held you a little tighter, kissed you a little longer, and not said goodbye so lightly, because now it’s really over, you’re not coming back this time, and never again will I call you mine.

I had a talk with the moon tonight he simply asked if I was alright. I told him no, see I have a bad a case of wanderlust and don't know what to do, there are so many places to see and so much to do.
I want to explore, fly, hike, and get away there are simply just not enough hours in my day.
I don't want to leave to run or to hide, but simply to be free, be young, and be wild.
Now the moon is a wise man who told me what to do, he said go spread your wings and just be you. Go now before you turn into dust, for that is the only cure for wanderlust.

I need to confront my feelings, I can’t keep running away, and then find myself in a puddle of tears on the flight home!
So I’m going to let myself be, let myself be mad,angry, hurt, sad, or whatever feeling comes to my heart. Then I’m going to welcome it, embrace it, make it a cup of coffee and let it visit as long as it needs to. Then when we are both ready I’m going to walk my emotion to the door and wish it well until the next time we meet.
It’s time to feel, and make peace with my feelings I pushed them away for too long I’m ready now.