Why is I should be the bigger person?
Why is it I’m crying at 3am?
I greif , I lose , I drink.
But you.
You get to be happy and find peace.
You broke me .

And sometimes I don’t tell anyone my feelings
As there is no language that could describe them.

How does one create so much pressure that doesn’t exist
And still destroy them?

Life itself makes no sense
And yet here we are

Maybe there was never a place in the world
For people like you and me
We just  happen to be here.

I broke my own heart in a way
Staying awake till 3am
Thinking of the memories I barley remember
You are the reason I trust everyone’s words

Joke are funny, you took it to far though
We grew up in two different worlds
Yours where no one speaks about it
Mine, speaks to much

Hypocritical that they are aware of not to joke
About eating disorders
For fear it may be triggering for those around them
But yet mock this situation without guilt

But I do
I carry there’s and my own guilt
for saying stop
I am not too emotional

I am triggered
Yes this generation talks
But I’m worried that one day they do
I do not take lightly of the words

I believe them with all of my soul
You shown me though actions
Who am I to say they won’t to
Why teach me this lesson so young
Burdened my heart with Grief

My head is filled with only memories,
When you took my heart
Wish you took them too.
Rewatching our stories
Like a film on the old screen,
Not letting me rest.
Thought I might have changed your mind,
But you have secrets
We are not meant to know.
Years later still unanswered questions
Years later high off memories we once shared.

She wants to change the unthinkable
Live in a classic
Wake up.
Childhood is over.
Years are fading
Still thinking you have time to smile.
The worlds decided not

Should you notice me if I dance in the dark,
Know I’m only here for you.

Our souls connect as you read my story as your own.
Tears, anger, except
Try me like grief.

Feel me, blame me, let me go

Know my peals shine brighter with your present,
And tears fall when you're turn to leave.

Im a barbie girl, in this barbie world
It's fantastic, everyone's plastic
You cannot feel me their
Why do you think you can stop and stare
******* me with that, imagination.

I post daily, fooling everybody
That I am perfect.
It's horrific.
Convorting myself into this typical dumb blond chartor.

Glaze upon my skin as it is flawless
Little do they know it's stage makeup and filters
I have many scars on the inside.
I am starving, but cannot dream to take a bite
Got to pretend that my body is perfect.

Im a barbie girl, in this toxice world
I am drowning, but the waters plastic
You cannot feel me their
But you could not care
******* me quickly, it's fantastic.

Telling all the little girls thats i'm so happy
And this is their dream life
While hiding in the corner hating every part of myself.
Somebody save me from this glitter nightmare.

I'm stuck inside this dollhouse
The walls won't break
They just dress me up, because my lifes a game
But jokes on them, my blond is fake.
I hate my pretty pink prison.

Im a barbie girl living in a hell world,
It is honestly fantastic, no my heart is plastic
You maze well touch me their and undress me anywhere
Now I have realized no one really cares.
  
Yes im a barbie girl, living in a barbie world
I am now an addict , it's fantastic
No one want to stop and stare
No one wants to feel me there
When I'm washing down the pain with pills and drinks.

Even in lock down
I see young girls as  pray
Through the eyes of social media
Are you to blame?
Sexilising my body
Until I am an nothing but an object
“Don't go on instagram then” they say
“But I've done nothing wrong.”

Our girls and women
Our daughters and our mothers
Anxious to walk on our paths to education or work.
6 out of 10 dread the thought of stepping on the streets once again.
Its 2021 and our woman have fear
Like the yorkshire ripper is out and about.

I curse my sight
I don't want to see that 97% are victims
We are survivors
Why have 80% been harassed in public
Look with your heart.
This is not normal
Stop normalising.

I am not a lamb and you are not my shepherd
To all the girls that are in their school uniforms
Getting the whistle by people older than their fathers
Im sorry.

I'm sorry that 1 out of 3 have lived through this.
And sorry for all the little girls hold their best friend in their arms,
As she sobs

I don't want to see this
This is not my future
So let me eat snow whites apple and wake me up
When the world learns to give a ****.