Mammy Jospehine,
Death lingers on your breath;
From every third sentence
The untimely demise of a friend
Is plucked from your alexandria
And laid to rest in the London air.

The engagement party became your wake;
Gratitude came first, some qualifications second
Since our celebrations reminded you of your reverend
Who possessed your heart in full
Until his tendons supporting you
Severed clean when he rode a bit too quick
Molding his Harley into the spine of bricks
Previously the boundaries of your new home.

Leaving the party in Cousin Jason's car
The joy on your face seeped into my arm
Revealing your age old scars.
Praising the jollof rice and the confetti
You stopped and realised you were indeed not ready
To forget old Aunty Eunice
Who welcomed her release from an unsteady mind.

Even though I saw how much joy hurt
I couldn't help but feel peaceful
Because I know that your true strength
Is your ability to know that persistence is evil.

Yet your persistence
Despite the toll its taken
Enshrines your Friends
In the Prism of your qualified lens.

Delicately poised in the center of my palm
A fly, its slimy eyes poking out of its head
As it scuttled across happily,
Seemingly scouting the fleshy terrain.
I could crush it in my hand.
But this time… I won’t,
Not straight away anyways.
For even though I hold complete control,
Everything
Deserves a chance to escape
The deathly vice grip of humanity.

Angelically gold Mary stood stoically
Cradling all that I’ve known to be true.
His father is dead; blank was his expression
Blank were the people bowing to him.

For all meaning had been lost to the wind.
Once, this place teemed with the beams of children;
Now that our fate is confirmed, we merely stare
Without sight.

Standing tall its rungs seemed so far apart then
The ladder peered down at my achievements with glee,
Realizing that I was nowhere near the standard of the men
That so easily surpassed this obstacle before me.
I tentatively touched the ladder, pleading for a strong foundation;
The steel rungs screamed back at me. Nonetheless I flailed forwards,
Gripping the battered beam without hesitation.
It told me of my critical mistake as it flung me westward,
And the jagged cliff loomed on as I was propelled ever closer
To the end of my hubris, that so set me on this path years ago.

All that is mine I carry with me.

My frosted spectacles
With the tiniest crack on the surface
Just enough to make them special.

My leather wallet
Beaten by years of rain and use.
Inside, a polaroid of the one I consider divine.

My keys
For what I do not exactly remember.
They stay nestled in the back of my pocket, rusting slowly.

My lyric book,
Complete with unfinished ideas that ****** at the
Back of my head, pleading to be finished one day.

My Memories,
Which have a repugnant smell of loss
That I embrace with open arms.

My ‘Dreams’,
A potent synthesis of reoccurring nightmares
Fundamentally unrequited in its presence.

My Addictions,
Virulent Vampires leeching droplets
off who I adore so dearly.

My Love,
You too are being ripped away
So quickly.

I think for now
I shall stare at my lyric book wistfully
Through my spectacles, hoping for redemption.

Perhaps one day I will again be able
To show you the Polaroid I hold so dearly
And finally get to use these keys.

All that is mine, I carry with me;
Hopefully I could one day
carry her too.