Lost in a spider's maze
a mind set ablaze
lost in a ocean of self hatred
slowly dying with no wish to live

but see that light?
it's coming for you
there's someone waiting for you
someone who needs you
someone who will miss you
someone who will cry every night your gone -
physically or mentally
who would never forget
you
or any memory made with you
someone who would perish without you
Don't forget someone cares
someone always cares
trust me I know
she cares, someone cares

An empty promise
flouts on the breeze
stopping time to time
to remember the soft lips of who it left
to, one day, bring forth toxic tears

childish tears
over a lie, they had to tell
broken for your best
sick and tired of throwing your heart in the dark

a chance to end the hurt
a chance to end the acid tears that burn as they fall
a loaded gun
a shotgun blast
for a single second of light

a chance to say goodbye
a chance to walk away
- from the dark
a chance to put your heart down
a chance to blind your eyes,
so that you need never
read the book of pain again

but something breaks that thought
something makes you realize dying today
isn't the way
a shot won't do good
that bit of light's cost is too great

so you think
I'll stay here a bit longer
I'll dance in this dark abyss
broken and alone,
invisible to the world
and do the best I can
for as long as I can

and you'll always wonder
what was it?
what was it that made you stay?
what made you put that gun down?
Because Hope seems like too small a word.

we used to be friends
best of friends actually
but when you let insecurities get you
you became a poser and broke my trust

I do not like...
                                     not knowing.

Not knowing,
if our lives have meaning.
If our words are just spoken or heard.

If the wish I made on that star,
when I was seven,
ever came true.

Or if moms kisses
really made those scrapes and bruises
heal faster.

Did the tooth fairy
really trade common currency
for my baby teeth?
                                              Or
The bunny hide things
just for me to find...

I wish I knew,
But there are NEVER enough stars...
For the questions,
I wished to know.

Despair and leap
into the cloud of fog
mouth shaped in a silent scream
rain masks the regret that falls from her eyes
will she survive?

her headstone bares her last words
spoken as an angle fell
*i want to live