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Fucking tired Oct 2015
Lost in a spider's maze
a mind set ablaze
lost in a ocean of self hatred
slowly dying with no wish to live

but see that light?
it's coming for you
there's someone waiting for you
someone who needs you
someone who will miss you
someone who will cry every night your gone -
physically or mentally
who would never forget
you
or any memory made with you
someone who would perish without you
Don't forget someone cares
someone always cares
trust me I know
she cares, someone cares
Thinking of turning this into a song not sure though I would have to edit a bit and this would be the chorus of the song hmmmmm....
Fucking tired Sep 2015
An empty promise
flouts on the breeze
stopping time to time
to remember the soft lips of who it left
to, one day, bring forth toxic tears

childish tears
over a lie, they had to tell
broken for your best
sick and tired of throwing your heart in the dark

a chance to end the hurt
a chance to end the acid tears that burn as they fall
a loaded gun
a shotgun blast
for a single second of light

a chance to say goodbye
a chance to walk away
- from the dark
a chance to put your heart down
a chance to blind your eyes,
so that you need never
read the book of pain again

but something breaks that thought
something makes you realize dying today
isn't the way
a shot won't do good
that bit of light's cost is too great

so you think
I'll stay here a bit longer
I'll dance in this dark abyss
broken and alone,
invisible to the world
and do the best I can
for as long as I can


and you'll always wonder
what was it?
what was it that made you stay?
what made you put that gun down?
Because Hope seems like too small a word.
  Sep 2015 Fucking tired
xie
we used to be friends
best of friends actually
but when you let insecurities get you
you became a poser and broke my trust
  Sep 2015 Fucking tired
Nameless
I do not like...
                                     not knowing.

Not knowing,
if our lives have meaning.
If our words are just spoken or heard.

If the wish I made on that star,
when I was seven,
ever came true.

Or if moms kisses
really made those scrapes and bruises
heal faster.

Did the tooth fairy
really trade common currency
for my baby teeth?
                                              Or
The bunny hide things
just for me to find...

I wish I knew,
But there are NEVER enough stars...
For the questions,
I wished to know.
  Sep 2015 Fucking tired
am i ee
i'm gonna get me
a new set of eyeballs
too much readin'
n writin n stuff

can't proofread
worth a dam
gotta go live my life
not set here n write

now i got me's
a little nut
and she writes
not so slow

i ain't much
fer words
likin the
sound of silence
myself

but this little
new nut
she's kinda a
cute little darlin

so with my eyes
whirling in despair
i slog forth
until they can
be repaired.

i gotta get me
a new set
of eyeballs,

one new set of eyeballs
i'm gonna get
me.
hey if anyone can bring in the cowboy accent to make myself with a spelling that reads the way i am hearing it in my head that would be fantastic.

sound like maa self, i am open to suggestion.  i hear it but haven't read much of it, so i know i'm off with the spellings that convey the accent.  thaneee
Fucking tired Sep 2015
Despair and leap
into the cloud of fog
mouth shaped in a silent scream
rain masks the regret that falls from her eyes
will she survive?

her headstone bares her last words
spoken as an angle fell
*i want to live
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