Heather

Heather Sep 2024

Tinted glasses
In a lightless room
She reaches and grabs where she can
But it’s always a shallow effort
Transactional love

But that’s not the love I want to receive
I want to know you trust me
I want to feel you support me
Not take and take and take

I learn to cut the strings for people who are great at wasting my time.
But I mourn each thread of the girl I used to be.
The little girl who hugged lonely looking people in the grocery store.

#narcissist #friendship #old #bitter

Heather Sep 2024

Give me space

Unfortunately once I hate you
It’s infinite
It grows and furls in every space of my mind
Unfortunately once I love you
I’m bound to hate you

#space #cold #love #hatred #lost #miscommunication

Heather Sep 2024

2 something

What they never tell you about loosing weight
Is that you feel each piece leave
There is a tangible feeling of less protection
Maybe society is so afraid of fat because they know the truth
Fat people wear their armor 24/7

#weightloss #pcos

Heather Sep 2024

Fear

Lately I feel like a bird with wet wings
In theory I have the freedom of the skies
But I’m stuck on the ground

Heather Jul 2024

Ride on my back

Oh the many many places my anxiety will go
My sweet little parasite ******* me dry
A million small humiliations
My reflection gnarled and twisted at her hands

Heather Jul 2024

First to last

The funny thing about standing at the mountain top
Is the way it casts a shadow on all the steps before
No matter that I’m looking down the path I just walked
I can’t feel that first step again
I can’t feel the feeling in my stomach the first time his hand brushed mine
I can’t feel the flutter of that first kiss
I can never again feel that first ******
But the cursed last one, that one you never forget.

#first #time