In a garden of black gnarled trees, lit orange with fire of a failing sun
I play hide and seek in the deepest corner
Beyond the briar maze
Beyond the home of an ill-tongued jewel green snake
Beyond the fountain that cracks the earth and roars forth
and the rainbow drops of mist glistening like knives as its veil
Somewhere built into the most cloistered wall of bricks
my body is there
I seek and I seek but I do not see
Until I close my eyes and pray for sleep
I rejoice and I tug my arm
trying to pull me free
But the girl in the wall holds a finger to her lips and shakes her head
Curling herself deeper under its weight
Go back to sleep, she whispers urgently,
You can't find me here
Go back to sleep, quick
I put my hands on my hips
Clearly, I found you. I think I win
You lose, says an all too familiar voice
Death grabs me by my handles and spins me around
You aren't supposed to be here, the boy in my head scolds
I came back for her I point at the wall
I watch myself cower deeper in with the other skulls
You can't find her here, he says
I own her
Go back to sleep
I don't have to listen to you I say, but he and I both know it's not true
My hair runs down my back,
the nightgown I don't wear at home billows in the wind
The moonlight slices my throat
You can't flirt with me and expect not to fall, Death says, calmly
I've done a pretty good job so far! I try to break out of his grip but he tosses me into the air like I weigh nothing, and I feel the pull of sleep reaching its web-like fingers out to me
I know I should be grateful that he's spared me again, but I keep fighting
What is his game? I'd thought hide and seek but I was wrong
He makes up whatever rules he fancies, so how am I supposed to win?
I play a dangerous game, flirting with ideas. Oh, I have no intentions for them, but I caress them with my mind, a safe haven for the gleaming silver of a sword and the boy who wields them all. How often can you flirt and not fall? How often can you dance and not die? I return to the garden night after night when I should be sleeping, and every time I think I've won, he is there to change the game. How soon until he changes my mind?
Once upon a time, he told me I could stay in the garden forever with him.
I wonder if his game is that of waiting.
sleep-deprived