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Material things don’t entice me
Empty promises don’t  count as a remedy
Flowery words are pleasing to the ear
With apparent intentions clear

Is this just an infatuation?
An effect of my subtle imagination
This relentles game of tug of war
How I wish it wouldn’t end up in a scar

All I know is that I’m tired of this dance
Might as well give us a chance?
You have gone way past this armour
Consistency, that is all I am asking for
In a room,
I am reading,
glancing out of the window,
or I am looking at what I am writing.
Then I stop.
Discouraged, distracted, I am exhausted,
lie down, sit up, touch my toes,
swing my arms, make a phone call,
ignore a call, hear a voice, see a message,
answer it, don’t, there is plenty of time,
too much time.
Only time.

In a room,
I am restive, restless, and bore myself.
I look at my books,
shelves overwhelmed,
actually I watch them,
I am their guardian.
Books live for me to read,
books are alive when they are read,
but mostly I fail them,
and they rebuke me.
I look for distractions.
I look at my cat,
my cat is not worried,
and I am I.
Traveling around the room as the truest kind of travel—and also the most democratic type of travel that has or will ever exist..
And in my sleep, I am wide awake.
My dreams are vivid, my dreams are many.
I live and die a thousand lives, each as real as any.
Waking up with extreme brain fatigue, feeling like all the brainpower was drained due to the countless high paced, action packed dreams your mind was racing through can be rather unsettling, especially when you are trying to just rest the old mind engine for a full day of productivity.
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