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 Jun 2019 Crystal Freda
violavics
You can lift me
with merely a smile
my head tilts at the sight of you

I want you near  
stroking my hair
gazing through my eyes

Speak to me more
about you and your interests
anything you can possibly share

You can see me
in the days and nights
when my hand reaches out to you

I want you here
cradling my arms
submerging through my mind
missing someone who caught my eyes and mind
June 13, 2019
Dear future wife
, for now, I don't know you yet
                   but yet
         I know I will love you
             and care for you
          
           Dear future wife
  for now, I don't have you yet
                    but yet
         I know I will have you
           and you will have me
    
           Dear future wife
, for now, I don't have happiness  yet
                    but yet
I know I will have it and you will have it
         when we become one

          Dear future wife
, for now, we haven't become one yet
                   but not yet
so let's become one once and for all
         and be happy as one
how will l heal when my wounds  bleed every time l see you
whenever you hurt l find myself in pain
if only tears could dry
just a random thought
.
… and the look of fear
co-existing with pain
     on a contorted face
that knows
it is in mortal difficulty,
as ragged fingers

     clutch,

          clutch,

at a fire they cannot reach,
ripping agonies react,
     to an enforced cardiac episode,
as blackness closes in
gravity heaves its hardest,
but the fall is fake,
a red herring in the event,
     and the weight of the world

presses down, searching,
retracts
waiting,
presses down, searching,
retracts
waiting,

as breath is given freedom
in exhalation to the light,
     that slowly rolls back
the pitch hue of the void,
returning back images,
feeling,
a new belief,

          and the fire inside quietens,

                    and the fire inside quietens,

to the intense glow
     of a burnt aching heart.




© Pagan Paul (2018)
.
This poem was actually written during a panic attack I had last year.
I have suffered from them for most of my life.
.
 Jun 2019 Crystal Freda
eileen
sometimes i just wanna know
are you sleeping
are you awake
are you dreaming
what are you eating
what does that mouth say
dying to stare into those eyes
driving out into the city life
i bet i could go faster
you torture me
leaving
wondering
I'm always wondering
what's under your skin
 Jun 2019 Crystal Freda
eileen
don't have a moment to think
I just want to think
I want to cry
I want to scream
I miss the city
I miss being alone
I don't have privacy
I'm not independent
a moment
a day
I'd like it if you went away
I'll be taking the long way home
I can't sleep
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