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  Sep 2018 Cass Indigo
helloitsyellow
i have told the story of how you destroyed me so many times
and the funny part is
that i tell it the same way every time
but this last time that i told it
it felt different
and
i have spent a long time thinking you took up more space than you actually did
because i dedicated a whole chapter of my life to you
and for a while
that was the only chapter i was reading
but
it turns out you were just another paragraph
in the story that is my life
and
my story is my favorite book to read
so i won't let you ruin my favorite book for me
you barely deserve a page
there is no way in hell i'm giving you a chapter
  Sep 2018 Cass Indigo
imperfectwords
"I can see my door, my bed, my window, my chair, and my table.

"I can feel my spine against the wall, my feet against the floor, my jaw tightly shut, and my fingernails buried in my arms.

"I can hear the wind coming in from the open window, my heartbeat rapidly thumping, and that familiar voice in my head, shouting once again.

"I can smell the dampness of the ground outside as the breeze carries it to my room, and the sickly sweet odor from the soap used on my hands.

"I can ******* blood spilling from the bite in my lip; my last harsh reminder that
        I
        am      
        still
        alive.
When you call a suicide prevention hotline, they will often ask you to describe to them 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste to help ease anxiety. I hope this poem helps someone struggling to look forward, because believe me, it does get better.
  Sep 2018 Cass Indigo
andromeda green
with all this work around me i start to wonder
when will i collapse?

collapse from the sleepless nights from too much worrying
collapse from the hours of homework that fill my days
collapse from the procrastination i can't cure myself of
collapse from the stress of all my commitments that haven't even started yet
collapse from the expectations that nobody has set upon me
but from the expectations that i put on myself.

collapse from all the love and support from my family and friends
because i never thought anyone could care this much about me.

i want to scream and shout that this much love in my life is so hard to feel grateful towards when my thoughts are constantly turning and wondering
when will i collapse?

-  a.g.
  Sep 2018 Cass Indigo
Solus
If you survive,
Go tell the world.
Not that you survived,
but of what happened.
Bring awareness to those,
Who were left in the darkness.
Hiroshima and Nagasaki,
9-11,
Parkland shooting,
Only naming a few.
For those whose voices are forever quieted,
Speak with the weight of their legacy on your shoulders.
But don't carry the load alone,
There are others who feel the same,
With tear-stained faces, their burden is heavier than yours,
So shoulder the pain together,
And survive.
Tell the world. Let us end this suffering.
  Sep 2018 Cass Indigo
ethan
you have to find the stupid reasons not to **** yourself.

for example:
i can’t **** myself because i’m in marching band and we just got our drill. it would be selfish if i left a hole in our formations.

i can’t **** myself because my dad bought me a new package of that bread i like. it would be a waste to not eat it.

i can’t **** myself because my french teacher moved a girl next to me. it would be rude if i were to leave her without a seating partner again.

i can’t **** myself because my friends and i are in a gift exchange. it would be annoying if the person i got didn’t get a gift.

i can’t **** myself because my room is messy. it would be ******* my family if i left a mess.

i can’t **** myself because i have a group project coming up. it would be unfair if i left my partners to do all the work.

i can’t **** myself because it would inconvenience others. i can’t **** my self because leaving a hole would hurt their productivity. i can’t **** myself because me dying would mean that i never got to see the end of my favorite books, i never got to see my favorite tv shows, i never got to finish my favorite poems.

i can’t **** myself because i’m in marching band. if i do, i’ll leave a hole.
i don’t know if this is positive anymore
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