is joy the absence of pain or suffering
is happiness that exuberant feeling
I just am
things are well
things always go wrong
I'm still here
it's always thoughts about "them"
what "they" think
who are "they" if I am no one
aren't they no one too
aren't they just me
in another form
running on a slightly different program
aren't I kinda tired of seeing me
all over the place

Guilt.
What's that?
It's only a program to keep you there
or point you here -
depending how you see.
Shame
is guilt's warped and twisted uncle
with a messed up childhood.
Leave that alone.
The negatives never outweigh the positives;
never stand up to the truth
the ancient ones knew.

And no one will ever know you were here.
   What's the meaning behind this?
   You can't scare me anymore.
   I am here anyway.
no matter what happens
however terrible
   I was here first.
   Why is this program to think
of horror and despair?
   Who wrote this program?
   It's terrible.
Yeah, terrible.
But you can be anything
   I want to be
   like the elves
   and like the hobbits.
Want to manifest as lithe and willowy
   and nimble and natural and free.
   I want to relish and treasure Earth
as she is.
   I want hair to grow to accentuate and clothe. A super-fine baby
   hair all over the body. Each one growing a unique pattern that
   evolves over the lifetime. No need for clothes to cover - only
   accessories to carry resources. I can get as sci-fi as you want.
   Where is all of this going?
Exactly.
There is no purpose.
No one will ever know you were here.
   That I thought up that creature.
That you hoped and dreamed and imagined you were real.
   All the while, knowing inside, all of it
and you
   is only
an illusion.

Finally I experience living free
See that's what I really am
I see thoughts - all of them from everywhere
See them float past
People think they are the thoughts
Think I am the thoughts
But it is not so
We make the thoughts
and then forget what we create
Thinking the answers come from someplace else
Not coming in a linear way
Not how one might call straight.
But still, it is the simplest
What might I record and for who
Or to what end
For every end there is the same beginning
Why can't we just put our silly toys down
Aren't you tired yet
Hasn't anyone else heard the calling
of blanketing sheets of silence

There isn't much hope in this intellect and mind
Hope isn't one of the programs it was given
But you look - and you see
worry dresses quite similar
What to do?
You can always practice nothing
Always look at things not doing
and see them doing nothing
This way, no matter what does
or doesn't go down or come up
It's only nothing
in your own conscious awareness

So then, who experienced
What is writing now
Mind tells all kinds of stories
Spins greater sorts of tales you never could imagine
till you saw the silence it comes from
It's tricky like that
Maybe that's why we see all the wealthy
turning to nothingness
But we see everything

This is how I know from where it all comes
If it is stolen it has a dimmed and rough quality
And if it is pure it blinds anything else with its light
That's why when you bring light
you can't call it darkness anymore
Isn't darkness made outa light
Gets its meaning from light
It's like, let's go as far from light as possible
to see can we get away
not seeing that to see at all
you need This Light
It's just like the ancients say -
There is a slow way
and a direct way - a way that is now
We can choose this way. Now we can
if our programming allows
Does your programming let you download
the upgraded version
of this here and now human being?

I thought one time
that I was something separate
like you can order a burger
without the meat
if you do
isn't it something else then?
it isn't like that
not like that at all
not like you can order a burger
that isn't food
all of it is food
the burger gets it's meaning
from the fact that is it food
burger is a cow
what are you?
where do you get your meaning from?
what are you a piece or particle of?
are you like this?
look, you can see.

I am seeming to wait for a thing which is already here.
It has neither arrived or appeared.
To whom could this One appear?
Is this philosophy? This is truth.
There is a thought, which persists, "Yes, but why this?
Why this life? this scenario? These characters?"
And the reply comes, "Why not?" -
Is someone else somewhere else
living my own wildest imaginings?
It is all an imagining, isn't it?

I wish I loved you as much as you loved me.
Then I wouldn't have lost so much skin in your game
that I thought I was truly living rather than paying to play.

I used to think.
     Freedom was a place far off.
Now I see.
     Freedom is what I am.
I used to believe.
     I was bound by another.
Now I know.
     I am bound to nothing.

Take what you know - as truth -
discarding all else. This is the way.
I used to hold to things - onto a thing.
But now I am spirit
needing nothing. Now all things
pass through me.
I see everything and hold nothing.

Sometimes
this is only a human word
meaningless in reality
I am always now
not in the now
cuz now just is

The words come
the thoughts come too
feelings
emotions
they come
then go

Free?
Free is creating
the universe of which you exist
there is only living
and the mind

There are different ways
various practices
everything goes to the same end
the beginning

a person - family
community - nation
and world missteps and seems
to be forever off-track
even being here
one becomes lost
the appearance of being lost
the sense one is lost and blind
yet still one is here

There is a hard way
and an easy way
a long way
and a short way
complicated and simple
there isn’t time
only now is real
so only now one must see
this is the easy short and simple way
to reach the beginning at the end