To dehumanize someone
Is to break the chains
That hold their wings
To an earthen reality.

Does complicated emotion
Really prove
That we are above animals?

Or does it drag us down?

As comets fly
Splitting the sky,

Innumerable stars
Litter the beyond

A fleeting moment
Worth a million words,
Yet only so much
Can I say.

Let time flow as it does
And embrace my icy hands.
We’ll continue this walk together,
Because even I am not immune
To the coldly lonesome weather.

Skipping stones
Like wishing bones
Water spraying
Like stars praying.
Glimmer and flash
Into a feathery splash.
A midsummer sun
But winter’s begun,
So with the ocean I strive,
Cold and delightfully alive.

How much longer can I suppress this feeling?
It seems that my time is running out,
Faster than my own terminal velocity.
I just might consider what I see as an atrocity

I could never commit such an act!
Professing my love is a horrible move
This sounds innocent to everyone, i bet
But to her i feel emotionally in debt

She had stabilized me when I needed it most
I would have never survived leadership otherwise
She made me feel all these new emotions,
More than I can count on my fingers.

But what I want most,
Is to thank her for everything she’s done.
She doesn’t know it, but she saved my life once
And I wanna apologize as well.

I want to apologize for someone like me
To end up being the one that liked her,
I want to be with her so
I can thank and apologize without problem.

I love her,
More than I can describe,
with my current vocabulary at least.
It must sound cliche, but it’s true.

I wish I could be the one to make her smile
But I’ll end up being on the sidelines
I was never meant to be the protagonist
And life is no romantic comedy.

Why did I like her?
Se seemed cool.
No other reason.
I wish it was a better reason.

How’d I fall in love?
A moment of euphoria.
After a completed challenge,
I gazed into those eyes,
And it all snapped into place.
I wanted to hug her,
We were both swept up in the moment,
She probably would’ve resisted though.

But I have to come to terms.
She is above me, she’s the valedictorian.
I’m in a measly 4th place.
I can’t ever go out with someone out of my reach.

I want to rise up.
To third or second
To come close to her
Or even with her
Before I confess.
I cannot wait forever though,
For I cannot hold my emotions back indefinitely,
And eventually I’ll break down.

I want to help her
She seems so stressed.
She’s always smiling,
but just like me,
Her smile hides stress and pain.
I want her to smile for real
And to feel really carefree
I would shoulder her pain w-out a second thought.


It would be nice,
If she could help me too...
I don’t need it, I shouldn’t want it,
But I kind of do anyways.

Icen fingers
And burning napes.

Winter is moving closer,
And when all’s said and done,
Life still continues.

Even if we’ve all been stopped
For many months.

Two hearts,
burning bright.
Hands held tight,
Knuckles turning white.

The snow falls light,
Radiating a pure white
But these two souls
Shine far more bright.

Trailing out what’s left inside;
Leaving a path.

Lurching into the fray
Letting come what may.

I don’t know what’s left
Inside of me;
Bloodless, emotionless.

What keeps me running
Away from my problems?

Silent eyes
Words unspoken
Verses written
Apologies given

Losing voice
Minds refraining
Old moon’s waning
A soul’s new painting

Verbal life
Lines on run
Vocal chords sung
And a world undone

In our poetry it’s hidden
The questions we are asking
And answers I’ve never won

Is it a song of defeat in the eyes of death?
Or of the solace felt in their closing breath?

The white blanket recedes
Revealing a jade carpet.
Snow comes,
And snow goes.

It’s a youthful romance
Of heaven and earth.

Chasing
A long-forgotten mist.
Running
On Lævateinn’s edge.

The final sprint
Just seconds away
Tedium envelopes my being,
While my flames fade to gray.

the ashen flower
continues to grow on
after the demon's power
destroyed the world we thrived upon,
but more flowers will rise anon.

To love,
Is to live with pain each day,
The pain of mistakes
and misconceptions
Will litter your beating mind,
Burning your head at the thought
Of their beauty.

To live and love them
Is to let go of it daily.
All the pain and suffering,
Regrets and remorse,
Let go of it.
Otherwise you’ll end up
With rosy cuts in your arm
And venomous thoughts,
That cloud your delicately
lovestruck mind.

Live to love,
And love to live.
Let go of what you love,
But never let go of your life.

A citric eastern breeze
Beckons in frosted waves.
A mosaic of spectral sun
Drawn upon the fractured glass.
Surf exploding onto rocks
Like the trillions of stars
Now twinkling,
At twilight.

As life draws its thinning line,
A darkness falls behind closed doors.
A creation of which mankind abhors,
Destroyed through the course
Of our destructive mental wars.

Feeling the waves
Fleeing beachside,
Reaching oceanbound.
With feet planted in the ground,
But you’re nowhere to be found
My heart leapt forward
To save that which had drowned
Yet it was too late
You came to comfort,
My worldly hate.

A world of emanating noise
Filling my mind with static,
The voices are in and out
Their sounds more that sporadic.

Living in a world of noise
Shouting through my soul
Living in a world of toys
Screaming away what’s whole

Maybe if I become the bird
To break the egg;
The world,

I’ll shatter the ice locking
My heart in place.

Throwing off these chains
Of human connection,
And hatching into a dove.

Is it red or gold?
I can no longer see the difference.
They both have meaning, warm and cold,
but I have no background inference.

Red like the fluttering cardinal's feathers,
but with a worldless ocean of depth.
The eminent vitality permeates the countless layers,
and a single look was enough to deftly steal my breath.

but it might as well be a searing gold,
with its sheen of softly sleeping amber.
A vibrancy that boils my blood cold,
and fills my mind with fruitless clamor.

I see it as neither or both.
The gold brings solace, while the red is my reality.
Before the colors flow, I must swear my saving oath,
that the delusion will never end my forlorn vitality.

Nov.28.2019

A brilliant arrangement of colors...
Well only one color.

A plethora of a single shade,
A void of only that color.

Dragged through the void,
Many years of pain.
But on the other side,
Lie a rainbow.

Oh so beautiful,
Oh so colorful.

A pillow of color,
To rest my weary head upon.
A therapeutic spectrum,
To help me stand strong again.

The mind can go colorblind too.

Beauty to be found
Lies throughout the stony earth.
In the morning dew ground,
We find the life that shall be known
In all things
where the wind has been blown

Lips brush softly
As a passing breeze
Carries a feather.
She’s leaving again,
But not forever.

A sudden silent hit
Comes to greet me
When I least expect it.

The wind swallows us
In her eternal grace,
So I try in haste
To be her home base.

As you drift away
Like a long-forgotten shirt;
Growing yellow on the clothesline,
I stand,
Immobilized and Immortalized
Within the reaper’s ace of spades.

My face is but
A vicariously vibrant visage of life,
In which I see the world
Through a shield of silent subterfuge;
A void that covers my vibrance.

A faceless watch
Cannot give the time.
A faceless person
Cannot see eye-to-eye.

As the endless expanse
Stretches itself before my eyes,
Flickering lights create depth.

All that lies between
Is the iridescence of our sunset,
And the fragrance of our universe.

*******,
I ******* **** at
Naming things.
From pets to poetry,
None escape my
Horrible naming spree.

I still remember,
The days of old;
My days of young.
I just got a new pup,
He was cute and small,
But he needed a name.
And so I shouted out,
With little to no shame:
“Evil Trash Can the name!”
This was quite large a hurtle
For my parents to say yes to,
So I then suggested “Turtle.”
After all, his collar had
Turtles designed upon it.
The names were getting
Uglier by the minute,
Much worse than a hog.
So I went simple and direct:
“Dog”
My parents were
Laughing at this point,
My dad dropped his
Nice trucker hat,
And I tried once more...
“Cat...”

This story is not a lie,
I cannot name things,
No matter how hard I try.
My names are horrific,
So I apologize for any
Naming problems
You have with MY
Poetry.

You left something behind, once again.
I just kept counting my fingers, one to ten.
You been forgettin’, lettin’ down,
Berating, belating and I just keep waiting,
Watching you hating all the things I am
Creating with my shaking hands.

My ego keeps deflating
At every insult you’ve been making
It’s infuriating how you are thinking that you are getting away with all the **** you’ve done to me.
I haven’t been forgetting or hating or belating and berating...

Until now.

You left me behind.
Do you wanna pick up what you’ve forgotten?

A single grain of salt
divided the ocean,
creating a rift
for the convoy of change
to triumphantly march,
and once again unite the ocean
in it's revolutionizing wake.

People always say
That mistakes are okay.
But what consolation
Have we made in preparation
For when mistakes become a blight
That decimates our planet’s light.

Silence.

Cold wind
Shaking shackles
In its violent breeze.

Voices chat
Of odds and ends,
Have their arguments
And make amends.

Silence once more
Not a voice heard
Over this uproar
Of silence galore.

Cry me a river,
Hum me a song.
Whisper me a shout,
Find where I belong.

Orchestrate me a melody,
Incinerate me a candlelight,
Shout me a far off whisper,
Let me fall to a worldly blight

Scattered across countless blades,
Sliding over the glinting steel.
All I can see is my touch and feel,
But what lies between these
I cannot take as real.

Gazes repeat on occasion,
Looking into what looks back.
The mirror lies at the edge too;
All it takes is a single step.

Maybe it’s not
A needle and thread,
But a voice.
One which carries words
On waves above a crowd.

Like a spell,
Diffusing itself from the wand,
Or a petrified cat,
When it’s cage is opened,
a wave of
Conflicting
Confounding emotions
Drown me in their lust...

Their lust for hatred.
Is this spell of confusion
Just to ignite a flaming rage?
Or am I too confused
To think clearly?

What does “okay” even mean?
Out of all the information I can glean,
It is just a way of saying fine.
But it cannot be fine,
Because fine is the exact opposite.

Whenever I hear ok,
Things usually are not perfectly fine,
And whenever I say ok,
Again, things are not perfectly fine.
Things are usually pieces of ****
that make me cry, in misery or in loathing.

But does that mean blind comfort,
“That’s ok” “it’s ok”
Is just venomous words hidden in a
Pastry-like consolation?

And why, am I ok while writing this poem?

In the memories
Ashes turn to dust.
Thoughts gently carried
by the air’s disturbance,
Blowing the dust
Out of existence.

You can be the storm,
And destroy my world.
You can be the ashes,
Falling like stone.
There’s a world I own,
And a world you’ve flown.

You can be the feather
Of a flightful bird.
You can become the breeze
Of my heart’s summer.
A world that I’ll flower,
And a world you’ll enter.

Gentle white outlines,
Glittering in the gaze.

A hanging breath
Coating the air
Like a newborn’s blanket.

A frosted world,
Sweet,
Sour,
And all that lies between.

One of my best friends, and the third friend I ever made is finally getting a replacement kidney. It’s hard to express in words just how happy I am for him. He’s been a lifelong friend for me and I’ve had to live through the decline of it’s functionality. All I can do, is hope that tomorrow’s operation goes smoothly.

The miasmic thoughts flow unrestrained,
The **** of daytime sensibility removed.

Thoughts of far off events,
Hosted in worlds parallel
To our very own.

Dreams of the impossible,
That I’m to prove feasible.

Hopes of happiness,
Or the arrival of those
Who beckon it’s luminescence.

“Will my thumb, a now desolate scape
Of nerve damage and love ditched long ago,
Feel sharp sensations, as it once did?”

I just want to cry,
I want to spit my tears upon my pillow,
and cry in my silence for the remainder
of my raven eve.

Why can't I cry?
Where is the salty mix
running down my cheeks?
Why do I feel the tears well up
even though they don't release?

My mask is broken.
the fissure ran its course,
and split my face right open.

Standing on the cracks,
I flip to the last open page.
Emotions dragging my into chains...
The air around me still feels like a cage.
Living in a camouflage
Of the things within my rage.

Stuck wide awake,
After being given
A rather rough wake up slap.
Now a red rash of fear remains,
Stinging my brain with sharp pains.

The stars all look brighter in the sky
Sometimes i get so lonely I could—

The darkest flares
Burn within the brightest bonfires.

Leave me for the worms,
Run, or let me run.
I don’t care what you do.
I’ll only hurt you
By being here,
So you should just hurt me,
And save yourself
From a corrupt heart.

Through snow and pine alike,
Salt soaked shores
Preceding a treacherous hike.

The blood of denial
Resides strongly in my heart.
Sickness and injuries won’t do me part.