I...
I dearly miss you
Not because loving you brings me to life
Not because you made me smile a little brighter
Not because I once thought we were meant to be
All these things made me desire your company
But I unspokenly wanted all your attention
If I had asked, would you have accepted?

Or would my greed and insecurities
have driven you away?
You knew my insecurities about
             my appearance
                       my family
                               my past

You took me as I was
But I never found a common ground with you
Keeping me in the dark about you
         Your attention
                  Your Patience
                            Your composure
                     seemed to all be a facade
I wouldn't notice thunderstorm in the background
   Of course, I notice
I always wanted you to be truly happy
A happiness that might not involve me
Sadly with a smile, correct myself
      Will most definitely won't involve me
              if I catch a glimpse
                  please let me smile and cry
                        Let me drunkly sing to
                          Jeff Buckley's Hallelujah

You crawl into my heart
so that I can't let go
So that I can't forgive him
So that I continue to love-
No, so I can continue to obsess
over him

Almost every beautiful thing he said
Had you written all over it
Lies
Lies
And more lies
That I couldn't stop shedding tears
Cause for some reason
I knew
The cherished memories I want
Were all in the past

But the lines you planted
And the truth I saw
Were two very different things
I have yet to forgive him