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  Oct 2016 Jo
JoSmith
Me,

Right now, you're in high school. Everything about it *****. You're not sure who your real friends are. You're so self-conscious. You've decided that no one could ever love you. You're afraid of being judged. You can't stand your parents. Well, let me tell you, it gets better.

Remember all those "friends" you thought you had? Well, they aren't your friends now. But that's okay, because you decided who was really important in your life. Now, you have your best friends. People who actually care for you and want to be in your life forever.

I bet Whats-His-Bucket reminds you how fat you are everyday, right? Well, that's okay. You'll come to realize, that you're not fat. You're thick. Now, you shouldn't use that as an excuse to not eat right or exercise. But it's in your genetic makeup, you'll never have a thigh gap. You'll always have a big *****. You're stomach will never be flat. You won't fit into designer jeans, but that's okay. It's okay because you are BEAUTIFUL. You have your mothers face, and she was gorgeous. You have a wonderful sense of humour, and it's attractive. You're smart, passionate, witty, spunky, weird. You are beautiful.

Love? You'll never find it in that town. All those boys you wanted to date in high school, married. Your first boyfriend, ******. But that's okay. It took some time, and some heart break, but you found the love of your life. He is someone who makes you feel special. He makes you feel worth it. When you have felt dead inside for so many years, he has brought you to life. He loves you, and you love him. Don't worry, he's not going anywhere. You're getting married to him.

You're so afraid of what people think of you. Maybe they'll think you're weird. Maybe they'll think you're too religious. Maybe they'll think you're a freak. Maybe they'll think you're too tall. Maybe they'll think you're dumb. But that's okay. You'll leave your hometown, you'll go to college, and you'll realize that no one cares. And if they do care, they aren't worth caring for. It's part of weeding out the fake people, and truly accepting your self. ***** them! You're you, and they won't change that.

Parents. Now, this one is tricky. You can't stand your father or your stepmother. You wish they would disappear. You just want them to leave you alone, and stay out of your life. Like, I said this one is tricky, but that's okay. You see, you moved out and your relationship with your dad got better. You respect your father, and you love him. But with your stepmother... you've learned to respect her as a person. You have yet to respect her as a mother figure. But, you've learned to compromise. Things have gotten better.

Sweetheart, it gets better. Life seems so tough right now. It seems so hard. At times, it's just too much to bear alone. But kid, know that you are never alone. You have angels watching over you. You have real friends who will pick you up when you fall. You have a God who will never let you go at something alone. I wish someone would've told me all this sooner, but I'm glad I had the experience. I'm glad that I could learn and grow. Now, since you're not in high school anymore; when you get down on yourself, read this letter. This letter will assure you that everything will get better. Life can get tough but that's okay.

Love,
Me

{Jo(e)}
High school was a particularly rough spot in my life, and I wish I could've had this guidance, or assurance, that life would be okay. But, now that's it's written, I can remind myself that life gets better.
  Oct 2016 Jo
lulu
"i'm sorry."**

the two words you uttered that night
the two words that still haunt me today
and the two words i never knew i needed to hear

did you mean it?
were you sorry for leaving me?
were you sorry for allowing your ego to overcome what we had?
were you sorry for what we had?

well, i'm sorry too.

i'm sorry for fighting for you
even when i knew it wasn't right

i'm sorry for holding you back
when you could've been happier with her

i'm sorry for loving you
when i knew you weren't for me
  Oct 2016 Jo
Ruman Hafsa
I doesn't say sorry
Doesn't mean I won't regret
It's just that
Uttering is what my guilt doesn't let

I doesn't react
When people censure me
Doesn't mean
That I am carefree

It really hurts when they say
I have a heart made of stone
But they doesn't understand
That I feel so lone

A guilt in my heart
Sinks me down in it
Like a broken ship
Drowning in an ocean's pit...
I really want to correct my mistakes
  Oct 2016 Jo
Somebody's Me
She wants to cry
but is too scared
to show how she truly feels.

so she just put that
fake, little smile on
and tries to live
day by day...
  Oct 2016 Jo
Graff1980
I push back
against
the frothing
phlegm
that clogs my throat
and drains down
my cleft chin.

I push back
against
the razor
that has been
like a pendulum
of madness
and human
suffering
cutting left to right.

I push back
against
bad influences
with a few exception
because a little bad
ain’t so bad
and you gotta get mad
to change that
which keeps pushing back
against your desire
to be a decent human being.
  Oct 2016 Jo
Little Bear
and i
never thought
i'd be
so fortunate
to never love like
i really
wished
that i could

but that's okay
because i'm glad
i don't
feel it
like you do
because when you go
i'll be spared
all the things
that most
go through

so i'm okay if you stay
and i'll be okay
if you leave
and i'm okay
if you want to
when i die
that you might grieve

so if you leave me on the side of
the road a while
i promise
i'll just play with the cars
it makes me smile
and i promise if the day comes
and you don't return
your keys
i promise i won't beg you
make a scene  
falling upon my knees

because
i'm okay if you stay
and i'll be okay
if you leave
and i'm okay
if you want to
when i die
that you might grieve

so don't worry
that i'm bleeding
from the inside out
just move along
and sing your song
there's nothing to see
here

because
i'm okay if you stay
and i'll be okay
if you leave
and i'm okay
if you want to
when i die
that you might
once
for me
just
grieve
just a poem/song/words/messy/ lol/ :o)
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