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Casey Sep 2020
Don’t dwell on it.

Be free.

I love you guys.
Positivity post :)
Casey Sep 2020
I don’t even know how to write anymore.

I used to swim in this ocean of words and ideas.
Now it’s just sand.
Slipping through my fingers.
RIP
Casey Sep 2020
“  Don’t ask me how I’ve been
unless you’re prepared.

Truth is, I haven’t been great, but that’s
predictable.   “

I’m not even looking at her anymore.
Just staring at the ceiling, this deadpan expression carved into my stone face.

She asks me if I need anything.

I just laugh.
Bitter, cruel.
This is past the breaking point.

“  No, no.
It’s too late.

You’re too late.  “
Don’t @ me
Casey Jul 2020
The fact was, I didn’t want to because I was afraid of addiction.

But then I had this thought—
1. if you do it right, it’ll only be once so you won’t have to worry about that.

That’s how it all starts, right?

2. Just this once,
you swear it to yourself,
only one time.


Except we all know it’s never just once.


3. You don’t even want to, but at this point it’s become more sort of a, “Why not?”.

4. Staggered footsteps and a headache later, you forget your feelings.
Regret doesn’t matter when you’re too busy giggling at the spinning ceiling about nothing.


5. But then you crash.

And you’re tired.
You’re so ******* tired.


6. Rinse and repeat.
Don’t do drugs kiddos.

P.S. Renny if you’re reading this it’s about CoFFeE.
Casey Jul 2020
Why?

It’s not fair.
How could they do that?

I’m sick of being hated for existing.

Why do they hate me so much?
What did I do?
It’s not my fault.
I can’t do anything.

Why?

I could have saved her.
I failed.
Please forgive me.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
Hey dad, my identity isn’t political viewpoint you *******. I’m an idiot to think you’d ever want to know me.
Casey Jun 2020
Once upon a day of spring, while I thought, in the early morning,
Over many an empty and ignored notebook paper on my floor—
While I was writing, nothing shocking, there was a sudden knocking,
As of something frantically pounding, pounding at my chamber door.
“ ‘Tis the poet’s muse,” I uttered, “knocking at my chamber door—
I’ll let it in, nothing more.”

Ah, with sorrow I can recall how onto pages the words would fall,
And every phrase was brought to me from a tempest to the shore.
Eagerly I searched the sands;—digging for them with frenzied hands
I would find my poems, but I can—can never find them anymore—
For the wretched but beautiful language that was once my being’s core—
Beyond my reach, evermore.

And the symphony of a distant dirge filled me with a sudden urge,
Enthralled me—thrilled me with lavish courage felt certain times before;
So that now, in spite of what is real, I opened the door with zeal
And asked, “Muse, will I never heal? Am I destined to find empty shores?”
A buffoon was I, for nothing but a whisper far off from my door.
Quoth the whisper, “Evermore.”

“Be that word your leave, fake muse, you mirage!” I howled with grieve—
“Stay no longer in my presence, knock no longer on my door!”
But the whisper, the muse, remains still lurking outside causing me pain—
Incessant knocking, there’s no refrain—more papers strewn on the floor.
I plead with the muse, I beg it to take flight from my chamber door.
The muse just states, “Evermore.”
LA Assignment was to write a parody of Poe's poem "The Raven". Fair use and all that, I don't claim to own this since even though I did write it, not every phrase is original so therefore don't credit this to me.
Casey May 2020
Here I am,
once again.

It’s 11:00 p.m.

No words.
Shot nerves.

How am I supposed to sleep?

I’m staring at my phone screen.

Check it once, twice,
wait, check it again,
maybe something popped up between the time it took me to blink.

But it’s still the same.
No notifications.

It’s 11:00 p.m.

Bits of conversation float through my head.
There are a million things I want to text, to say, but how do I even begin?
Please be safe. I hope wherever you are, you’re safe. ☀️
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