She reads
                                          And she sleeps
                                                      Way too much
                                                            ­           It's her coping defence
                                                                ­               When nothing else will suffice
                                                         ­               She needs to get away
                                                       Without actually leaving
                                             Because she's too scared
                                   And too tired
                                            To leave her bed
                                                      So she cracks open a book
                                                            ­     To escape somewhere far away
                                                            ­             And she'll sob for the characters
                                                      ­                       Whose brokenness resembles hers
                                                            ­                                   And then she'll sleep
                                                           ­                                   And have sweet dreams
                                                          ­              Of realities that are not her own
                                                       Because pretending is so much easier
                                                 Than facing reality
                             So she'll sleep and dream
          And secretly wish she won't wake up
So she can finally escape

Oh hi, hey
Will you stay?
Do you wanna?
Tomorrow day?
Can you feel it?
Am I dumb?
Don't give a ****
That's no fun

Oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-ohh
You dont know, oh
What I know, oh
But will you just play along? Oh.
Will you let me do you wrong?

Oh hey, hi
I heard it through the grape, the grapevine
That you said you thought I was fine
That you hinted you could be mine
Oh, well unless you give me a sign
Because I'm a geek, I'm meek and prone to whine
Are you signing at the dotted line?
Are you the reason to these rhymes?

I changed my sheets today -
the ones that smelled like your cologne...
Actually, "tore them from my bed with the ferocity of Midas" may be more appropriate.
Because I couldn't stand to spend one more night pretending as if you were here -
or as if you were ever coming back.

I washed that shirt you wore
You know, my favorite one.
The same one I've slept in every night since you left
just praying to find some morsel of solace
to delay the impending insanity of sleep deprivation.
But just because I could smell you
didn't mean you were there...didn't mean you were real
and I almost started to wonder if you'd been here at all.

I didn't eat today
or the day before that, if I'm being honest.
Food has no taste, no pleasure
without you at the table, fork and knife in hand
ready to devour it - and me.

I went for a walk today
down the street to our favorite spot
and I didn't spend my time wishing you had your arm around me
or wishing you were holding my hand
or wishing that your warmth was pressed against me to help tame the goosebumps.
Or at least I tried not to.
But who am I kidding?

I met someone new today.
He smiled at me and said something forgettable..
then asked me to go to dinner with him next week
and there's nothing I'd like more than to say yes
but still...

After all this time
I know it's your face I would see staring back at me across that table
and your body I would wish for
lying next to me in bed.

I was sad.
So I told them.
I am sad. I said.
Is that so? They said.
Swallow these. They said.
So i did.

I was still sad.
And I told them this.
It's no better. I said.
Is that right? They said.
Well try these. They said.
And I did.

I got anxious.
I told them.
I am scared. I said.
You oughtn't be. They said.
Take this. They said.
I obliged.

I felt nothing.
So I told them.
I feel empty. I said.
Oh good. They said.
We're glad to help. They said.
And I sighed.

While all of my friends will tell me no,
I say yes because I can't watch you go.

While all of my friends won't like you at all,
You're quite the catch, and it's worth the fall.

And though I've just met you, I can't help it, you see,
I'm thinking about you, hoping you're thinking about me.

I wanna be the first to know
I wanna be your number one
When your skies are grey
I wanna be your Sun
I wanna be the Sun

When I first met you
I knew you were different
Nobody thought it was true
But I had my sights set on you
With those big brown eyes
You'd look through your hair at me
Whenever I'd touch you
I could suddenly see
I could suddenly see again

Everyone loved to talk
About what they saw in us
I don't know what they thought
But behind us, always trailed a fuss
Bobbing heads and flapping mouths
Like they knew something that we didn't
We would just laugh it off
Those little hearty bouts
Oh how I miss your laugh

so there's this girl that i met
about a month ago
yeah, maybe a little over a month ago
might be two months, for all i know
but i digress

my point is that this girl
she likes me
she likes me a lot
and i like her
i like her a little more than a lot
maybe a little too much more

but there's this problem
it's been around since the first words we spoke
and it's been clouding my brain
for as long as i know her
and i just can't seem to let it go
and i'm usually good at that sort of thing
but i guess everyone gets a little
broken
sometimes

see, this girl
i work with her
we talk for hours
and hours
while we're serving customers
and trying to hide the fact
that we might talk a little too much
from the other employees
and the management
because that's bad for business, you see
customers can't take notice
or even have the slightest cause
even for a moment
to wonder
or think
that anything may
or may not
be going on behind the scenes
between the people
that serve them behind the counters
at the movie theatre
it's just unprofessional
people have gotten fired for this
lots of them, so i hear

we have a problem with that though
see, when we're around eachother
it's hard to act normal
per say
it's hard to seem unassuming
when the person you want
is right there
only inches away from you
it's hard to fake something
that's just so real
so we don't do that good of a job
to say the least
of keeping what we are
what we have going
on the down low
so we constantly get things like
"you two better be dating"
and
"you two act so much like a couple"
and, the classic
"aww, you guys are so cute together"
i shrug it off for the most part
or i just smile
just a bit (because i can't help it)
and say something like
"no, we're just friends"
or
"no, it's not like that"

but it is
it is like that
i want it to be like that
i wish and i hope that it could be like that

but going back to what i was saying
that little problem that's been shadowing me
and prodding at my thoughts and my dreams
is that
she already has a boy

The old part of me is dead:
The part of me that loves you.

I put him to rest on a grassy hill
Where the butterflies flock to roses.

There he lies, under the tomb of a dead tree,
Steadily being feasted on by cankerworms.

He is silent, he is free,
For he has passed the door

Into a realm of calm tranquility
Where pain makes more sense

And reasons why are no longer needed
For he lives in the Kingdom of Night.

She rules there and invited him
With a kiss and a nibble on the ear.

He could not refuse her lovely black lips
But he knew not where to tread

So she shoved him down with words
Of ice and sorrow and blame.

There he lies with her through eternal night
Caught up in the death of his life:

Her, the one, the only, the Moon
That fought the Night.

That old part of me is dead now:
The part of me that loves you.

He is silent, he is sleeping,
For he has passed the door

But the ghost of myself
Still whispers his love for you

Ever more.