Somethings happen for a reason.
And it's them things I don't question.
For if it were meant to be.
Then it would have been.

When I hear about a former doing greater.
I don't hate.
I just congratulate.

Even if they stated, where I could be?
I just say, maybe it wasn't meant for me.
Life leads us down different path.
So, as it stands now.
I have no regrets.

If, what you have?
I know I can get.
But for the present.
We just reminising.

If a lover is happier in their life.
It's not me to reflect negative upon them.
I'm more then happier for them.

Who to say?
I would been happier with them?
It would just be like me guessing
While I reminising.

I'm happy.
I'm thankful for what I have.
And that includes the lover in my life now.
It been years.
Even when I'm reminising.

I reminis times of beauty
That we never truly had

I like to go outside
In the early morning
The air is fresher
I can think clearly
Songs from the birds are so sweet
I close my eyes and inhale and exhale
Getting every thing in sync
Noticing the red sky
When I'd been out for awhile
I stand in the wind letting it blow my hair to and fro
Reminising of days gone by
When I ran through the field of bluebonnets
Laughing and enjoying
The beginning of the day
The morning
When I awake
The windows up
The curtains are waving goodbye to the night
And my smelling senses are going crazy
For breakfast awaits me
The morning
So pleasant
So calm
I wish it could stay morning
All day
Just for one day
I love the mornings

here comes the crash and burn
here comes me keeping score
of every **** thing you've ever done
in comparison to me I think you've won

watch me unweave into a basket
of backseat insecurity
you're driving me mad.

I'm sorry for not being there enough
and I apologize for shutting you out
but when every word from your mouth
shouts "this is your fault"
it's hard to stay calm,
it's hard to keep going.

I took my last breath for you yesterday
and now I breathe much easier,
without the weight
of a thousand problems on my plate.

this is food for thought,
your universe is not as big as me
I'm as small as a pebble
and as frail as the dirt
but I can still become something more.

Dissemble myself from you
piece by piece.

I don't want to leave you with nothing-
but I don't want to keep on hurting

Myself.

I'm done trying for your sake
should've seen this mistake
coming around the bend again
but we're at a four way intersection
and none of us wants to go.

I'll guess I've make the first move,
to move on from being you.
to move on from letting you
love me.

it's a sad song,
on a good night
it's a long drive
with no goodnight
kiss.

I'm craving things
I don't seem to miss
and it seems I'm done
reminising
about you.

These memories
were good to me.
But the pressure was too much.

I threw myself under the bus
and I never looked both ways.
I should've looked both ways.

Nothing changes. Every day ends the same. You come home, greet your family, light up a cigarette and lay down. You stare up at the ceiling, though you don't really look at it. You just sit there, thinking. Watching old memories in your head. Reminising about the good old days. Though they weren't that different from these days. You tell yourself, oh, how things have changed. But they really haven't. Nothing changes. Every day ends the same. You come home and things are still the same.

I met this young lady the other day
She said, "excuse me Mister, I know I don't know you but, I can't help but wanna talk to you"
I said what's wrong? She said, "you see, the thing is, I am afraid, I am scared, I am shaken"
"What's got you so frightened little miss? "
And she said "the thing is, I am scared I am falling"
"I am falling hard and I'm scared imma get hurt"
" Your looks, fashion, sense of style, the way you conduct yourself, got me falling "
"I know it's been only a couple of seconds but I can't help it"
"Thing is, I don't wanna fall unless I'm falling for you"
"I don't wanna trip-over"
"The only trip I want to have, is a trip down memory lane with you, when we are old, reminising about the good old times we shared together"
"You see mister, I don't wanna chase nobody, unless I'm running after your heart"
"I'm terrfied of these feelings mister"
"From the very first moment you waltzed passed, my breathing pattern became irregular"
"I felt like running 100 miles while standing still"
"Is this normal mister?"
"Of course it is little miss, and like any other phase, it will pass"
"See, like you little miss I once had a crush on someone"
"She told me the same words I'm going to say to you right now"
"You prince is somewhere out there"
"The one your heart rightfully belongs to"
"The one who will treat you like a princess"
"And when that moment comes, you will know"
"But as for me little miss, I have found a my Queen to my kingdom"
"So rest easy now little miss"
"And you know what, You don't need to be scared no more"...

Leaving Town

Thank you for all the time you spent with me
It was unexpected, and generous
Reminising about the past
Thinking about the future
Making peace
Finding some form of closure
Finding the strength to move on

I am not sure from what exactly
Thinking about you
The memories of us
The wasted time
The wasted energy
I am past it, I think

Flinching away from the shrapnel of dreans and goals
Talking to you was no easy talk
It took all I had to look into your eyes as you sat across me and not judge you
Understand you and forgive you
It took all I had to sit there as if it were nothing and simply talk without letting old feelings cloud my judgement
Speak my mind!
Be tougjh and firm with my words!
But I faltered…

It took all I had to not want to feel the familiar warmth of your hands brush against my cheeks like old times
We didn’t order Bumblerry pie and Ale that day
The coffee become stale and people buzzed around us
But I only had eyes for you
I looked at you so intently until I could look no more
The tears came minutes later like clockwork
I could not stop it
I do not know why
My revolve melted away
Maybe it was due to your voice
The soothing gestures
The new found kindness in your eyes
The humble behavior towards me

I know you will always be my weakness
But I didn’t deserve this
To feel broken all over again