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Clone re Eatery Jan 2015
Thee Artiste Carvó's "Fartistic Wind"*

A ****** seeps into Thee's loft and lispers...

"F-f-f-fartistic s-s-s-soul, I would like to be a fr-fr-fr-freak and ooze in your **** cre-cre-cre-cretinivity"...

Thee fartistic soul then cuts cheese, and says...

"If you are to reach true degeneration, you must first crap a work of ****"...

The ****** then begins to swirl round and round the **** bowl...

A can of trash then pervades the room and spills these words...

"Without a lisper there is no ******, without a ****** a lisper ceases to be"...

The ****** then collides with the can of trash...

A masterpiece of p-p-p-puke...


Original ('Artistic Wind') by:      Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by:    CrE aka Trollminator
This is the seventh in a series of reconstructions of the drivel of "Thee Artiste" aka Logbrain Crappó which has been previously posted on HP.

True, nothing could possibly make Thee's mindless nonsense less lousy, but at least it can be put into a neater, though still steaming, pile...
s u r r e a l Aug 2016
hitherto and heed.
this man with no greed.
face as mere as ants,
but heart as written so.

forthwith and in the now,
with a chest in the wrong place,
our brains midst logic and reason,
and mouths spurting mace.

for this man has trees that grow from his apple,
and lyrics that tie themselves to the oak,
simply tugging at his own branches,
and gaining strength as it broke.

for the world he laid himself atop,
does aches and curves his back,
for those hands move with grace against blank skin with ink,
and his lyrics sink and crack.

for the expensive sap,
from the alabaster jar,
glimmers quietly 'neath gasps,

and the noose and the
sentences
spill wars.

for his eyes are crusted,
miles yonder,
and his lips are chapped,
for-ever,
but his arms--and heart--and mind remain a never.

eager and spotless,
fearless and willing,
through trials and hot rocks,
the earth he's tilling.

trails of sound and light leading out to the world,
hold silent despite his might.
and urge and creeping yearn,
for his empty fright.

for the grass shivers at the fall of his pen,
and world cries out at the whisper,
but the man is nothing but mumble and slack,
and has everything held as a lisper.

for a man is nothing without his eyes,
and nothing without his lips,
a mere inconvenience,
to the insipid mind.

for an utterance may increase the waters it treads,
but it certainly wont sow.
and reap what it does,
without years to know.



                                           and grows...
                                      and grows
                               and grows
                         and grows
for the green tree grows
                                                                ­    merely to sink into silence, you say...

the man wags a finger,
and chapped lips ache a smirk.

quill to mouth--connected by heart to mind--line by line
against skin,
is an endearment,
and engraving of passion...


as speech may serve nothing to mind...                                                          ­   if it goes through one ear...

  and spills out the next...


it's the words concocted and stirred up by man--singing by lyre...


                              




and the purple eyes that open
                                            new minds
                                                              to­ the mirror ether.
For the wordless man...
Edna Sweetlove Oct 2014
A life on the ocean wave, **!
In the olden days of sail
When pirate ships were proud and brave
And their crews were very male.

Captain **** stood upon his bridge
Looking smart and flash;
But below the decks, the orders were
*** and *** and the lash.

First Mate **** went to the **** deck,
His willie at the ready;
Initiation time had come
For trainee pirate Freddy.

"Thtwap him o'er that cannon, ladth!"
Roared the hirsute lisper,
"Gag hith mouth thecurely, ladth,
Thilenth hith evewy whithper."

The pirates did as he had bid -
Refuse and they'd be punished -
And they knew their turn would come
Once First Mate **** had finished.

The lisping brute went up the poor young lad
And soon was pumping away;
Poor little Fred looked rather pained -
As he wasn't really gay.

Then came the turn of the other men
And they joined in with a will;
Little Freddy could not say "no"
Until they'd had their fill.

What a life our pirates had,
Always singing shanties;
When men were men and big and butch
And the skipper wore silk *******.

The pirates' frigates ruled the waves -
Good sailors feared them coming;
If captured, they'd be condemned
To a life of seaborne bumming.
I weally think stanza four is pwobably the finest one here.
It'th vewwy nithe, weally.
Ryan O'Leary Oct 2018
If I was a U.K. fisherman
with a lisp supporting
the leave campaign and
I caught a Brout would
you know what I meant?

The question is, if you did,
then am I expected to throw
it back because it was Une
Truite, Mais! inside British
Territorial waters?

Voila, there is our dilemma
POM Frites avec French Truites,
never the twain to meet. Mark
my words, if we're not careful,
it will be Boxty and Chip DUPE.
Francisco DH Oct 2013
And the wind talks no longer whispers
as it moves about this town.
The trees lose their leaves for they can no longer stand the winds talking.
People scurry indoors they too can't stand the talking.
but yet there are some who are still around
as the wind becomes lisper
They don't mind the wind's talking.
In the land of fairy tales lives a tiny Pixie with golden orbs, etched in detail  
with two pointed ears and pointy hat she is untouchable like the Holy Grail
In the fairy Kingdom lives the Silvan Elf contented with all his Tolkien lore
and every tale brings laughter and flighting, in the Forest of "open doors"  
In this land of fairy tales, a gaggle of mages use elements without trail ;

Little dwarves no bigger then my thumb ducking beneath tall blades of grass
reconciliation spells by magic lanterns lit, from gold to yellow, copper, brass
Their territory and dominion is the land between the trees, while the muses
scribe, on illusionary parchment as translucent as a moon beam, they douse
the fires of reality. In the land of fairy tales only magic lives with cheeky sass

In the mind of children and the very old alike, lives a splendorous green haven
where all fears and loneliness is spoofed away, and all hunger quickly shaven
With mushrooms as tall as I, and crunch bit Cashews as big as a drop of dew,  
no one slumbers without a full tummy and a yamusical song of sweet renew
Magical moon whispers and pranksters with a lisper, they even got a raven

Flying solo in the sky, in this fantabulous land of imagination Victor, is hero.

— The End —