I wake to marble ground
and golden chandeliers
with diamond jewels
hung all around
polished silverware
glittering, dreamy state
within the walls were but
drifting souls;
empty, quiet,
floating holes

the weight
of deception
burned it down
or time was due
and earth awoke
crackling sounds
amidst crumbling mounds

there are no people
who dare to stay
yet I run back in through
shattered doors
with a hoarse voice
raw screams;
an arrow through the air
fleeting blur, moving down

the pounding of my own
heartbeat settles to
regret the weeping over a
breaking line
but i spin excuses
for the family i leave behind

"if the children get to
laugh and play another day
I will run till my soles grow cold
and this body decays.”

then the lights go dark
but the sun comes out
to shine and ricochet

darkness fades with
fluttering eyes
and silence fills over
pulsing heart

a realisation then begins
of a distorted reality
where i was the buidling
falling for the earth
and love was the one
trying to save every part
in me from being
swallowed by you

because you are
the earth, the quakes
and the hurricane
you are the one
i have adored
despite
the
pain.


(A.H.Z)

Whats become of the creed, my brother?
People filling their coffers
with so much ***** coin
And filling their head
with empty irrationalities;
A temple of gold is no buidling
to atone their sins.
Oh why Oh why, cant they see
the cobwebs of dogma gathered
in their temple over the ages.
How do I see all this, my brother?
and they dont.
None of this was to be,
Not in the book that they swear on.
So lets stop waiting now,
No more prophets are coming now.
It is time, lets bring this diseased
temple of theirs down on them.
It is time, my brother,
for the gods to die now.
They need some new ones now
We build a promised land now
From the ruins of the old now.

You moan in pleasure as if i consent to it
You made me a prisoner
On a bed i once found comfort,
But now is a coffin buried six feet under
I thought being an adult wouldve given me the strength to fight back
I guess i was wrong
Your cold Tongue against my chest
Your cold hands aggressively held my wrist
I bet you can imagine the rest

Your body against mine
Your heart beating so fast
As if you knew you were doing me wrong
Created a cocoon of fear, pain and shame
You took from me a body that once was mine
A dignity that was in the buidling process
Time had stop
But i felt each movement in its slow motion pace
I bet you can imagine the rest

steps fading in darkness
You left me alone
My body felt cold
Paralyzed
Here i am, laid there
Where pain and self blame remained
Rewinding
To loud music
The atmosphere felt dizzy
Unbalanced
I couldn't see it coming
ONE MORE SHOT
Was the chorus of the party
I felt the effects just a little to late
I laid in a bed I tried to regain myself
Till You moan in pleasure as if i consent to it
Toungue against my chest
Your hands aggressively holding my wrist
I bet you can imagine the rest

i understand it now
when they say falling in love.
for me, it was more of a
plunge from a building
onto the bustling street.

it was not intentional,
i did not have plans to love you.
but that's the funny thing.
who really plans to jump
from a buidling
onto a distant street
without planning to feel pain
and
then
nothing?