It's always the same thing:
“Hold on”
To what?
“Distract yourself”
For how long?
“Keep going”
But why?
“It’ll get better”
When?
“People love you”
Yeah, but who exactly?
“You’re not alone”
Yes I am. Yes I freaking am. You don’t understand. I am alone, that’s the problem. Because when I go home and sit down in my room, I have nothing. Yes, we say "hi" when we see each other in the halls, but where are you when my phone goes silent? Where are any of you when I’m begging and pleading for help. Where were you? Not there. No, I had to help myself. Pull myself out of the dark hole I’ve been living in for years. I have to save myself time after time. By myself. Alone.
And maybe I’ve started pushing people away, but don’t you dare put this on me. Maybe I pulled away from everyone, but lets be honest, were you ever really there?
No, you weren't
I only pulled away after realizing I was already on my own, that I was just lying to myself. And honestly I'd rather be by myself, by myself, than surrounded by people who aren't even there.
is it self destruction if it was already broken?
all I did was be truthful