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Staring at gravestones
Wondering what it is to
Exist, no longer.
Smell of sulfur,
Feel of bone;
Still as water.
Brittle teeth,
Radiating sunshine.
Her smile,
A floodlight
Through my twilight.
The fog of war,
Haze of the before
That now haunts me, hereafter.
To die, and to live, nevermore
In moments of tears, and of laughter.
Or to exist, a galaxy away
On the thoughts of why, where
And of how, what for.
The answers, you can grasp,
But better not to linger in the past.

Seasons change, with life to live more and
Devil-may-care, departing henceforth
Next time,
I wait at your car.
Next time,
I keep your chain as a trophy.
Something to hold onto,
Pieces of this beating heart,
This bleeding hunk of meat
You pulled apart

Nothing to leave behind,
Emptied out old fool,
Call me crazy, act cool
I can recognize the signs

Along in the sun,
Along in the rain,
If you just believe
You can avoid so much pain

But I'm not able
Just to close my eyes
Push it deep down
And say I'm fine
Eyes wide, shut
Carnal knowledge of my fatal attraction.
The thoughts, graphic.
American beauty, in the mood for love,
Match point,
Jig, all up.
Regal, reserved;
Jaundiced youth.
Reasoning mad,
The mind of an absurd,
Without Camus, with no Kierkegaard.
Knowledge gleamed from living hard,
The blurred tatters of the patchwork memory,
Loose sense of self,
And fragmented morals.
Abuses have left their scars.
I know you hurt,
When you cut yourself.
Femcel, incel;
You're celibate, and not for a lack of trying.
Who gives a ****, give it a rest,
Get to work,
And get busy dying.
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