Present to the paradox  
Of a thousand conflicting truths
I inhale with a smile

Am I loved?
Do I matter?

Do others love me?
How long will they care?

Is it enough to just love myself?
Can I too end that loving?

No
It is primary
And can never be taken away

For I am love

In the emptiness between stars
In the silence between notes
In the knowing between thoughts
The gaps where I find truth

Where has
     my light
           gone?

Wait
     it's right here
I just had to
     open my eyes

Caught in a trap
Between thoughts and feelings
Finding both false

How to find the truth
The space beyond self-justification
To be at peace

Can I surrender my power
Can I become vulnerable and open
Fears arise and the dance begins again

Falling folds rest gently on the floor
Tiny portals show only congestion
Straight lines weave curve and intersect
All around chaos abounds

Charting my way through to the end of each day
Is a challenge that takes all of me
Stopping to breathe in the beauty
Seems like an irresponsible luxury

And yet why am I here?
Is it only to take care of the mundane?
Or is it the beauty which creates the meaning I crave?
I look again at the falling folds

The empty cup
That held such promise
Gently mocks me
From the nightstand

It says:
You thought you were everything
And now you know you are nothing
Embrace the emptiness
For it is the only thing that is true

When I step
Into the light
I can just be

I know the light
Will hold me
Heal me and
Show me I am whole

The ultimate
Unconditional gift
Always there
Whenever I am ready
To step in

The stark joy
Of life in all its glory
Is here
Right in front of me

Why am I afraid to
Engage
What part of my suffering
Keeps me safe

Notwithstanding
The pain I have gone through
I still have favorable
Thoughts of you

I wonder where you are
And how life is treating you
The “what ifs” bubble up
And cloud my view

I try to let go
Saying “it wasn’t meant to be”
Yet my love persists
Even though I told you you were free

I venture into the void
The space between mind and body
The space which holds intolerable pain

Pain triggered by loss
I sense its roots primordial

Exhausted, I let go and surrender
There is nothing else to do

To my surprise
The thorns turn to roses
Dark becomes light
And, all that is left is joy

A breath
A moment
This moment
Present to the whole universe

It is all here
Right now
Nothing to do
But be in the joy of it all