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 Aug 2021 Travis Green
RF
Gay
 Aug 2021 Travis Green
RF
Gay
If I wasn't gay would people care?
Would they actually let me breath the same air?
Could I actually go to school,
without people being so cruel?
Could I live in a world with no hate?
Maybe people would love me if I was straight.
It's not as easy as people think.
I can't just go to a shrink.
I didn't choose to be this way.
You really think I'd want to be gay?
I don't want attention,
I don't want fame.
This isn't some sort of game.
I am who I am and thats okay.
Most people don't see it that way.
I only wish I could be the same.
To have a wedding and it not be shamed.
I want to have kids and not be judged.
I don't want my reputation smudged.
But apparently I'm different now.
Sick in the head somehow.
Therapy and shock treatment for something that can't be fixed.
How did I get put into this mix?
Toxic and tragic,
that's my life.  
It's like I was stabbed in the back with a knife.
I'm gay,
what's wrong with that?
I get treated like some rat.
Using your holy books and your religion.
To fight against something that makes no difference.
I want to be a human not a punching bag.
Always getting called a ***.
Let that word have power and it gets to you.
But that words as good as whatever is stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I love being this way.
I don't care what you say.
I remember the first time someone explained to me what the word gay meant.
We were in middle school
Playing on the swing set behind Stoy Elementary
"He’s so gay," she said
Bitter disgust poured out of her mouth with every syllable
I could not think as to why being happy could be such a horrible thing
And so I asked
My exact words being
“Whats so wrong with being happy?”
Now both my friends looked at me weird
“Don’t you know what gay means?”
“Doesn’t it mean to be happy?”
“You’re such a little kid, gay does not mean happy. Gay is a boy who likes another boy”
I stood there wondering why it mattered so much that a boy liked another boy;
why it was such a distasteful thing.
And why it meant gay couldn’t still mean happy.
I tend to get stares... Looks... The occasional "are you gay?" With a quizzical look of disgust.
Well, to answer your question, no, I am not gay.
In a society built around judgment and stilted above common sense,
Being gay would mean that I'd have to find women utterly disgusting, flick my wrists, speak with funny and awkward inflections, right?
Do you think I speak with funny and awkward inflections?
Good! Because I'm so not gay.
Being gay would mean that I love to shop, well I hate it!
My fashion sense does not exceed that of a box of colorful crayola crayons melting away in the blistering Las Vegas sun because you see, I don't live in San Francisco, or New York,
or anywhere "gay" people live.
I am not gay.
Being gay would mean that I am immoral but I can assure you, moralistically speaking, that morals are what keep me routinely from listening to Lady Gaga, who I've heard, despite her catholic upbringing, is a devout devil worshiper and I sure as hell don't worship Satan!
Oh no, I am not gay.
My father once told me, in his manliest tone that if I ever became sweet
or my tank profusely filled with sugar
that he'd disown me and rid me of his home.
However last time I checked,
I don't have a tank
and one lick of my tanned brown skin would reveal that I am in fact quite salty!
Salty, as defined by Urban Dictionary, means to be ******.
Bitter. Angry.
Well father, there aint nothing sweet about my wrath.
I'm infuriated.
I'm angry not because I'm not able to fulfill the holistic criterion society has built in order to be gay,
No, I am more upset that there is actually a set of rules dictating whether or not someone is gay.
Now listen to me when I tell you,
I am not gay
I am not gay because I have yet to inject myself of substances with an unsterile needle for all purposes of getting high.
No, I have yet to discover my last ****** partner was diagnosed with *** and that I may very well have the virus.
No, I have yet to interiorly decorate my bedroom with the warm crimson fluid that is my blood because some punk at school thought it was cute to label me a queer.
I have yet to be gay because being gay in today's society means I am reckless. I am promiscuous. I am a *******.
Well, guess what society,
I am not gay.
I am, in fact, a man, who is not your personal show dog for your fashion approval that you can tote around in some cute Gucci bag.
I am a man, who can still appreciate the beautiful magnificence that is a curve when he sees one no matter the person's gender.
I am a man who, despite what you may be expecting,
is a man who, no matter how hard you try to box me in a confined image,
is a man who, will fight to freely be in love with who he wants to be in love with,
who is a man who is not gay
but a man who loves men.
I am not gay.
..
Totally gay.
Darling, your timid eyes,
moving lips
and happy smile;
Your shy walking barefoot
and beautiful eyewink.
I love them always in silence!

When you look at me
I suddenly feel like faltering
and I lose my words;
You are the blue in my sky
and the first love letter to me.
You are my untold love story!

Your voice makes me cool
and gives my heart pleasure
The flowing winds from your wings
swing my yearning dreams;
You are blooming like a morning rose.
I love you, darling, don't mind me, please!
BE
No one will see your pain
No one will look at your broken heart
Everyone finds your stain
Even to insult you, everyone is alert.

People don't honor your dignity
They respect your money like a boss
If you have no power in the society
Then everyone will use you like a toss.

Your family won't judge your wisdom
if you are responsible for everything
When you race your hope and dream
Others wouldn't keep patient with you.

Some of your friends will run away
when you are in such a tough time
You will get them back someday,
when you are having a good time.

Take it easy, often it happens in life
Find yourself in a place where you are perfect
and focus on your dreams without any strife
One day you'll get success because you are right!
You're the silent pain in my heart
I can't forget you,
You are tears in my tired eyes
I can't hold it in!

You are my elusive dreams
and heartburn like the ocean.
You're the hurts of my broken wings
I can't fly in the sky!

My eyes are filled with your glance
Your words make my heart dance.
You are my memory and pursuit
I can't stay away from you!

You are melted with my soul
I lost myself in your smell.
You are my secret romance;
I can't say that easily!
BE
The moon shines on the salt rivers
but you don't smile at me anymore
The honey bee sings for the flowers
but you do not knock on my door!

The rain falls down upon green nature
but you don't look at my eager eyes
The yellow bird sings in a pleasure
but you don't fly in my dream skies!

I didn't wish your departure
I wanted your happiness
I don't think of my future
I think of your goodness!

You aren't with me, but I feel you inside
I don't blame you but feel a burning inside
You still have a place in my broken heart;
But I can't believe now we're so far apart!

No, you can't leave me alone this way
I know, you will miss my love one day
Maybe that day you'll find me in heaven
Darling, my love is true and it'll happen!
How deep love in your eyes
I drown in there
How do you smile always?
Where I find pleasure.

How loving your shy lips
How sweet your cheeks
I draw them in my dreams,
I ask you in my prayer!

Could you give me a place
in your kind heart
there I'll have sinless peace.
I wish you in my desire!

How righteous your beliefs
with a pious soul
I have changed my thoughts
as your holy scripture.

Dear, let me walk with you,
where you found heaven
Give me some light of you,
what I'm looking for!
We're young; we're the champions
We are the spirit to our nation.
We'll bring the fresh morning
Let's go, let's go ahead, young!

We'll hit on the closed door
and grab the enemies,
We won't lose to fear
We'd celebrate the victories!

Our confidence is beyond the skies
to win everything!

We'll blow the smell of flowers
to move everyone's confutation away.
We are the strong sail in the stormy voyage
We are manic to win; we are young!

We'll control the whole world
to overcome everything!

We won't support any crime
We'll stay with our clime
If we are martyred for the nation
then we'll get good news from Heaven.

We'll bring the shiny sun on earth
because we are active young!

We'll stand against oppressive rulers
and we'll voice for the oppressed
We'll live like the warriors
and we'll welcome death in smiles!

We'll make everyone's dreams true
with our youthfulness!

We're trying to build a wall on Mars
and waiting for the moment
The world is looking for us
and we live in everyone's heart!

We will be patient in hurt
to face the opponents!

We are so charming to lovers
and surrounded by soft love,
We are the Lodestars
in the dark night sky.

We're young; we'll do everything
with love and passion.
BE
My Books
amazon.com/author/lurepot
One day you'll look in the mirror
and see your beautiful face there,
then you'll miss the compliments
about you, that I did before.

Someday you'll look in the mirror
and see your ocean eyes there,
then you'll miss the waves of love
that I drew before at your shore.

One day you'll look in the mirror
and touch your soft cheeks for sure,
there you'll feel the paint of my hand
that I colored before as a dreamer.

Sometime you'll look in the mirror
and feel your sugar lips with a finger,
then you'll find a heavenly taste
that I enjoyed before, but not anymore.

One day you'll miss my love in tears
and maybe you'll look for my answers,
but you are happier now than before,
therefore, my soul gonna be quiet forever!
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