I am being lifted,
Picked up to be cast down.
I don't know that I can handle such height,
The Light is overwhelmingly whole.
I was unaware of how effective the color black can be,
Vivid shadows are illuminated by my torch.
I am shaken by connection.
In this sense,
I am thankful for gravity.

We're drenched in the sweat of our precursors because they've walked this way long before we were thrown into the mix.
A continuous and branching path is the trek for truth.
Progressing together, we separate as we go on,
Only to meet up again at the coming together of roads,
When all knowledge is connected and implemented in an Earthly heaven.

All my life I've been alone.
Sure I've had friends and family,
But no one has ever really been there for me.
I had grown used to it.
Being by myself had become the norm.
I've had two people that I could share my secrets with.
But they could never relate.
They never knew just how much pain I had been in.
I walk around every day with a fake smile.
Until now.
He came into my life.
He turned everything upside down.
He can relate to me.
He knows some of the pain I try to hide.
I trust him enough to share my secrets.
He's been there for me.
The only one that can make me smile for real.
He the only one who can make me stop crying.
He's the only one that can make me laugh during a breakdown.
I love him.
I'm sure I do.
I've never cared about anyone this strongly before.
I like having another emotion then pain...

I'm losing interest in things,
In people,
In games.

Indulgence makes stale what you once craved.

I'll use you till I lose you,
The timing is always right.
For when I've emptied the glass
I'll be scouting for the next task
To wet my mouth with meaning.

There is a fountain just for me,
When I find it I can begin my life.

As each source proves more and more limited,
I wonder if there even exists such a thing.

I feel so ugly,
so out of place.
So worthless,
like I have the world to face.

Life pushes me,
this time I don't fight back.
I sit there and let it push me,
further,
further,
further down.
Nearly down a well of nothingness.

Here I am,
This is where I will stay.
I am happy this way

Happy feeling depressed.
Happy feeling worthless.
Happy feeling and being ugly.

I don't belong anywhere,
nowhere at all.