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Knees scorched and my heart is warm.
Reminiscing days of ocean blue.
Instead I sit in my armour.
Protecting the fierceness of winter breeze.
Hot and cold tend to possess this intensity.
Red licks upon cedars wood, reminding me of the significant vessel I occupy, is capable of feeling too.
There is a certain life to a flame, that I find difficult to express, so instead I will exist in this body.
Reminiscing.
beauty is a selfish pursuit. wild endeavours stood before me on short legs, her eyes seducing me with a look I’d never seen before. Her body was voluptuous; in a way that she could hide a flaw. with her smile, with her face I decided she was a canvas. she moved in feelings, and my brush was stiff. I couldn’t move her way so I made her move mine, and she obliged with a heart full of love. and she danced with her fingers between mine, so I would feel safe that her heart was with me. And now she moved in paint and my brush created a perfect picture of this woman who was mine. Although beneath the thick layer of colour I created for me, was not a blank canvas but a selfless soul who wanted to be free. A pursuit of beauty in another, for my own selfish needs. So I can hold her hand and call her my own. and so you see I’ve painted a pretty picture congratulate me. this canvas could’ve been many things and she hung herself upon a wall for me, to stay put forever.
hold my hand and lure me into your heart. blindly guided into a mind of one. alone you stand naked, only by the senses can two, reach symbiosis. flesh on flesh. a heavy breath can tell many tales, as can a touch or the way you are soft spoken in a room so vast. these little moments we create, are for me. and you. and I hold your hand truly. you’re not holding mine. this is my story told, and in the end you will realise; it’s all about you. this is it for two souls who mirror the human they hold close in the middle of the day. night. and it’s all we should ever need
Holding hands that let go. Limp. My energy drains his. I carry his burden, so I carry myself. Caring eyes can only care so much. I can see he does not love me. He will not love me. Am I patient? Or just procrastinating? Avoiding the inevitable, avoiding a reality where I am without a man who believes he wants me when in my heart I know, I am not the woman he needs. Or wants. And now I realise, I am not for everyone.
As i sit in my room,
after the sound of shattering tungsten
darkness envelopes

i lack eyes that can see anymore
lack ability to hear in the audible silence
lack everything but the ability to feel

and so i feel
  Oct 2018 Taymin-lee Pagett
Nyx
Photographs of naked bodies
Positioned across a bed
Seducing one other
By the gleam in our eyes
Dressed with the desirable color of red
Our lips dripping with pure lust
Forever but a mere inch away
Eternally unreachable
As pretend is what we like to play
Trace the outline of my body
Feel the softness of my skin
Dine upon the devils wishes
Give in to this lustful sin
Embrace the coldness of the night
Be intoxicated by our heat
Eyes glazed over from this dream
Slowly lose your willingness to fight
Taste the sweetness upon your tongue
Allow us to quench your thirst
But once you taste heaven gates
You will eternally be cursed
Drunken off the beating sound
Of our hearts within perfect synch
Pleasure induced by feeling Pain
Holding on tighter to that chain
Bruises and bite marks
Littering the skin
Relinquish your demons
Fall captive to that sinners grin
Harsh whispers in the dark
Lips pressed against your neck
Tempt me with such sins
my darling

My dear the night has only begun
Decipher what you truly want
As it seems our game of play is done
Both lost within an ecstatic dream
It appears that neither of us have won
Dirtied souls are all that are left
Without meaning or for reason
What have we done?
an echoing question
The devil replies with a taunting voice
My darling you have become undone
With a sly grin he walks away
Eroding into the dark of night
While the tainted souls
Together with their hands holding tight
A game that they were destined to lose
We have danced with the devil tonight
And it appears he has won.



~
It was a late night and the words were just coming to mind
So I ended up stringing this odd piece together
He has a spot beneath his ribcage.
I often find myself touching the soft skin that dips on his body.
He can be so ******* me yet his lips are soft.
He has gentle caring eyes.
Murky.
Never have I seen a set of blue as amazing as his.
Sometimes the gap in his teeth can be sighted between his pink lips.
And I know he thinks he is ordinary.
But I want him to know he is beautiful.
And like no other person I've ever known.
He will not let me love him.
I know he doesn't believe when I say the words.
He doesn't want to.
I show him by touching the scruff on his delicate face.
I show him by asking for one more kiss even when he is tired and agitated.
I'll always desire his presence and his skin on mine.
He will not let me love him.
Yet I do
Loving him is hard when he won't allow me to. I don't believe he means it when he says he loves me. But I am patient.
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