Can I have your attention please!?
FuckBoi Academy is now accepting applications!
We have a variety of classes for you to choose from...
and How to Communicate Poorly 203
As well as It's Not My Fault, It's Yours 207
Just a few of the basics for you young men to learn how to be the ultimate ******!
There's Ignore Her 102
Act Like a Child 301
and How to Never Fully Commit 211
After taking these courses your on your way to a full blown *******!
Try Tinder 405
Saturdays are for The Boys 413
and lastly How to Lose the Girl 430
When you're 40 and alone we'll send you your diploma!
Just something funny
They say if you have to ask yourself then the answer is probably "yes"
There's such a fine line between normies and the cursed
Me? I've been on both sides
I can tell you that a heroine addict is an addict
I can tell you some people really are sick
But I still look at myself and just think "?"
My life isn't unmanageable
Sometimes I do drink too much
On occasion I do stupid things I regret in the morning
Mostly though, I'm okay
Then it happens...
And I'm suddenly feeling out of control
My life becomes a drunken blur and I can't see clearly anymore
Then just as quickly as it started, it stops
Normie life resumes as if I had never gone away
But is it really stopping if a pattern is appearing?
If I am would I be able to admit it?
Maybe I've convinced myself to logically justify a problem
Or maybe I'm just young doing what young people do
Here I am back at square one again
The internal struggle that is me
When you were a kid you thought that you would be married by now
Have it all figured out
Now you're here and *******...
Do we ever really figure it out?
Adulting is hard
Your Facebook feed is filling up with engagements and baby announcements
but your reading the newsfeed in the liquor isle of Safeway
Beer or wine tonight? Hmm maybe *****?
"Psh who wants to be a boring married couple"
That's what you think to yourself
Trying to convince yourself that it's okay
Drown out that little voice in your head saying "you're gonna be alone forever"
It's like walking on a tightrope
One side you have it together and the other side you still might as well be that 21 year old college student ordering shots at the bar
If someone has this figured out- hit a homie up
Until then, I'm just doing me and I guess I'm doing fine
— The End —