How can you miss something
that was never yours
how can you want something that was forbidden?
I was taken
but you were there
your curly, dark, **** hair.

I was taken,
but you were not
you were rugged **** and hot.

you and I were close as can be,
close as can be with a boyfriend
a boyfriend who called and texted
until I iced up
swearing and yelling that I ****** up
I cheated
I kissed you
we ****** and I lied

little did he know
I wouldn't even sit by your side.
you were fragile, so fragile
I didn't want to touch you
I didn't want to shake you
or wake you from your living dream
I thought you would just break apart.
You big old mystery.
He didn't know I felt this way,
he suspected and he accused

Things unsaid,
things undone
you untouched,
me unloved.
unraveling feelings
unraveling thoughts

I thought I was happy,
so did he,
we loved each other long,
long and tenderly
It was familiar, it was safe.
He didn't know I wanted
all I didn't have

The weird thing is I was happy
and that's what makes this so bad.

You wouldn't be good, poisonous practically.
You were forbidden fruit, but I was hungry.

Now that you are gone
theres nothing I could do
I have a few regrets
one, was not reaching out and touching you.