If nine are all that you shall pass
The Circles from the Hell to grasp
If once you thought you have seen worse
Maybe you should try live to burn
  
What's to be sinner or a saint
Have you ever met one of them
If asking for their life and choice
Do you sense truth in their voice
  
Who will admit to have done wrong
Who will say I have left and broke
Who will be honest to say "Yes"
If asking have you wished a death
  
Isn't it very thin the line
Beyond which everything is blind
You think you're good but is it true
If saying "Yes" to all but you
  
The saint may say it's selfish then
You need to care for all men
But if that leaves your soul just drained
Will he come to heal you instead
  
What medicine can you take if
You feel like used as handkerchief
Thrown on the way where all feet step
Indifferent of sins or saints
  
Match nine lights -see your Universe
Burn down and come back all to you
Don't waste the second time in if
"Am I a saint-what others think?"

do you exist?

in this realm,
in this time,
in this small blip of moments,

and if so,
how do i capture you?
hold you in my hands.
in my heart.
how do i seek you out?

when you’re nothing of our kind.
neither here nor there.
you’re simply smoke and mirrors.
nowhere, yet everywhere.

you’ve got no flesh and bones,
simply god made and grown.
you’ve got no fear, just quest,
a longing to roam.

are you even real?

or just an ache that I conceal?

if you are just fiction,
how do I conjure you
and keep you with conviction?

you’d be locked into my mind.
giving me endless daydreams,
yet consuming all my time.

then maybe i’d be lost
in your never ending shimmer.

my life and light would fade
in comparison
to a low flicker dimmer.

i would waste my decades decaying.
simple, stupid, and waiting.

i would turn down every suitor.
yet I would be an angry, seething,
lovelorn refuter

and if i can’t have you,
or sift my hands to grasp,
what will be the purpose?
and what heart of mine will last?