250 gals and one old guy Lusting after me and I know why. I am a Congressman, I am a Republican, And they know what that means. It means big money in my jeans. Big money for partying hardy And if the ****** are smarties They will kiss a lot of fat *** And never rebuff a single pass Made at them, no matter how rudely. They will see it as their womanly duty To make me feel that I am great And lick on my head of state If so ordered, and quickly, Even if it makes them sickly Because I am a Congressman, And also, I am a Republican. As such, I am special and divine So there is no societal line That I should not ever cross Because I am now the boss And you people that voted for me Are the biggest fools in history.
If I had a nickel for every each and every Republican lie Guess how many congress men and women I could buy. I could buy another country and then I could use it to Put all those Republicans in. I would. Wouldn’t you?
I could work with medical science people To make a vaccine legal in court That would make all the legal criminals Wake up just three or four feet short And green and purple spots on them To make them all immediately stand out. Then, when we saw one of them in public We could point at them and loudly shout.
If we could somehow get back from them All the time they have wasted each year We could give it all to people who now Live without hope, and only have fear. We could legalize prostitution as well And make them all perform as doxies. But, who would want to make it with them? So, they would have to hire some proxies.
We could do the same with lobbyists And others who bribe representatives. And we could quadruple the taxes owed On them and all their pensioned relatives. We could make the remove graffiti marks Off of all our defaced walls and things. Then, we could make them work fast food And try to live by cooking onion rings.
If we could make that stuff from that movie That made liars tell nothing but the truth We could sniff these evil ******* out While they are still in their stinking youth. We could penalize their parents too For miseducating them so very badly. But there is no such magic potion And I make that statement sadly.