I STAND OUTSIDE MY WINDOW LOOKING IN
HOW DO I START, HOW DO I BEGIN,
WITH WHAT YOU DON'T SEE, A PROBLEM,
IT IS WHO YOU ARE.
WELL MAKE A CHANGE
STAND UP TO THE CALL
YOU SAID YOU WANTED ME AND NOW IT SEEMS AS IF ALL IT EVER WAS WAS A DOOM
TO HAVE BELIEVED AND HOPED, YOU LOVE  
THE ONE WHO WANTED ME, TO LOVE TO HOLD ME, TO KISS ME, TO CARE FOR ME ALL THE DAYS OF OUR LIFE,
WHERE DID HE GO, THAT MAN
INSIDE OF YOU DID HE SLIP OUT OR TAKING A BREAK
OR DIE?

HE JUST DISAPPEARED

SOMETIMES IT'S UNFAIR AND DOESN'T SEEM QUITE CLEAR
HOW TO THINK, HOW TO FEEL, HOW TO ACT
DO I ASK, DO I DARE, DO I BEG, HEAR UNFAIR
WHAT I ASK ISN'T MUCH JUST YOUR TIME AND TOUCH
YOUR LEADERSHIP WOULD BE WISE,
WILL IT EVER HAPPEN CAN YOU RISE
TO THAT JOB,YOU'VE BEEN CALLED
WELL, LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU'RE READY

you see me stand in pain
you just sit in stare, like well i don't care
you sit and don't help
not even when i'm in pain
it's so hard to believe
all you give is grief
not a shred of care
as if we ever shared
a single thought or idea
how can you sit, how can you not see
i need you, i want you, but you just sit
it honestly feels worse that a hit
no emotion, no reaction, no words ever
why should i have to feel like im always grievin

i want my son to have a dad
but is it the cost, me always being sad
you act like you don't care
you never help or share responsibiity
you never help with shopping,
you never help with mopping
you never help pick up our son
you never seem to do anything but look out for #1
i wish you could open your eyes
because the world you see, your missin
the days, the moments, the hours, with our son

I'm sorry.

For what?

Everything.

I don't understand.

I know.

Will you explain?

No.

Why not?

I can't.
I'm sorry.

If its getting in the way
Why not throw it away
If it has your thoughts blocked
Close the lid, turn the key, keep it locked

The burden of your baggage, heavy as you walk
You can hear its weight in the way you talk
Leave it where you cannot find, just let it go
The thoughts , the feelings, let them free flow

In time that has passed it should be laid to rest,  lost
The experience that came with such a heavy cost
No good comes to relive each day on repeat
You'll find you'll fall as they turn to return, your fumbling feet

You will find it hard
To defend and discard
So forge a relationship, a close association
It will become your greatest Allie disassociation

Moving forward, you naturally leave behind
All those things that made you blind
And as you smile into the next mile , the next stage
Let the inspired tone of a new experience replace the sound of your deafening rage

I miss the discoloured white walls
And the smell of cigarette smoke
And that wooden, black door
That can't be answered no more