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Kailasa mountain peaks
composed completely of clouds
hover mystically across the
mauve purple horizon

I stare dreamily out the car window
this celestial impression arouses
a sacred memory that has haunted
my consciousness
since I first alighted 12,000 feet above
sea level onto the blessed Himalayan
mountain range

I don’t think there is any place
like this on earth
glaciers hang like huge crystal malas
around majestic white bluffs
the air ripples, tingles tangibly with spirits of
Sages, Saints and other sublime beings
ethereal cathedral bells ring brightly
in the crisp altitude

The road climbing from Badrinath
to Vishnu’s auspicious Footprint
continues ascending
to the very threshold of Heaven
everything is just so luminous
even the breath filling our lungs
shimmers

As I travel back in time to that holy place
I know a part of me still sits in padmasana
aloft those Godly hills
through the melting snows
spring rains and summer monsoons
lost in supreme bliss
I serenade my Lord
before morning dew
leaves shimmering kisses
on jade green blades of grass

My heart always pounding, pining
paining for even a minuscule glimpse
of His saffron robes rustling in the yellow breeze

I brush away misty blue tears, fog rolling in.....
lest they obscure
His resplendent view

O Sweet One
How far away You seem......
We shared the same bunk bed
in the tiny Astoria projects apartment
I laugh to myself recalling the 3 AM singing sessions
we crooned right along with the Bradshaw brothers
stocking caps plastered to their heads
doo-wopping on the benches below
beautiful voices framing the cold,
unforgiving, angular brick buildings and ghetto nights
Sis, you were my head pall bearer
shouldering the shoe-box casket
along with an odd collection of project kids
forming a procession up 27th avenue
towards the green steeple church on the hill
solemnly we laid Pixie the cat to rest
“Last Looks” I quipped before lowering the box
she had accidentally slipped out of the window
and was not as lucky as Winston Parks
a young toddler who had fortunately
landed in the bushes
when our newborn twin brothers, Chris and Pat
surprised our parents bringing the count to 5 siblings
I officially became the 2nd mom
a reluctant teen, my head buried in a book
simultaneously rocking a twin carriage and stroller
LOL...seems like only yesterday we were camped out
in apartment #6B planning all sorts of mischief
now there is a pile of little shoes next to my door
and the next generation trudging in
with water pistols, bubbles and coloring books
Swami
Will you come tonight?
the gold moon hangs
full and low
a lantern beaming between
dark pine branches

I wait with a gardenia blossom
in my hand and the fragrance
of night blooming jasmine
in my hair

O Lotus eyed Lord
bhajans fall like petals
from my lips
Console us with the
sound of Your dancing ankle bells

Frogs are croaking in the garden
fairy solar lamps light a fragrant path
for you to walk upon

Frightful sounds of the world fade
away with holy hymns as the
mist sweetly parts

I wait like Radha waited for her
Krishna and Mira Bai too
only the blush of Your Love
sustains us

Perfume the world with your
Sacred Presence
Sai Krishna
Too many indigo tears

The Ocean
hides them beneath
her broad blue checkered apron

White capped waves skirt across
a memory
an act
drowned
long forgotten

Vomiting up
salt and brine
debris that won’t
stay down

Resurfacing, beached
upon
tomorrow


An
old shoe
someone once
wore
Beloved David
Seven years have flown
by on the wings of a swan
our wedding whites hang in the
pooja room closet
fresh and beautiful as
that first kiss
unveiled

With weak knees and stars spilling
from our eyes
we pledged our Love
before God
while angels tossed
rose petals and white rice

Seven years an eternity
we weathered the storms of
our ego
and cherished the droplets of love
that fell compassionately

Dearest Heart
On the auspicious
day of our wedding anniversary
I garland you again
and again
and again
The flower of my heart,
opens a little each day

You know, Beloved,

it's been blooming for
many lifetimes
The nurse wrapped a warm toasty blanket
around me as I waited for my MRI.
I wondered how many bodies this blanket
had warmed as folks sat
worrying about their perishable bones.
Then the thought came as clear as a bell
ringing, resounding, echoing from the apex of
a very high Himalayan mountain peak:
"I go on forever...I go on forever"
A gurney carrying a man in
obvious pain shuttled by.
I felt the sun rising over that mountaintop
splashing my face and
all the patients in the MRI room
“We go on forever…We go on forever…!"
Swami you have given me
my heart's desire
loving husband, family, good health,
new house, car, cruises, journeys across
Your teeming, bustling globe
There is nothing you have withheld
from me
in the midst of this hologram
high flying ribbons, gifts and
ticker tape parade
You stand,
larger than life
occupying the whole of infinity
More beautiful than anything I can
imagine, dream up or wish
Overflowing Omni Presence
take me into Your Rapture
forever
Just the way
the leaves fell
at that moment...

Divine cascade from heaven
golden chimes sprinkle
across the summer wind

A gentle gust lifts my
straw hat with the
origami pink, yellow and orange blossoms

Barely clutching the tassel brim
I look towards Your Invisible Presence
shimmering beneath that lucky tree

O Bhagavan!
"Not a leaf a falls without it being the Will of God"
from the limits of my white cocoon
fine spun dreams,  predilections
and myriad desires
I perceive the world
and sadly it ends at the tip of my
nose
O how I long to rip off these
wretched mummy wrappings
and not have to listen to one more
funeral dirge
or see a tear fall from a grief
stricken eye
my anguished soul flails
wings clipped, bound hand and foot
inside a corporeal coffin

while a delicate butterfly prays for the strength
and faith to live if only for a
day in the bright expansive
colors of its True Self
Naughty Bougainvillea
flash
their gypsy red burgundy parasols
like Creole maidens
from New Orlean French Quarters
their wild beauty
adorns Floridian gardens and
ocean courtyards

But, they are no match for
the Queenly Gardenia
Her soft, ivory, alabaster *****
exudes a scent found only in Paradise
As she unfolds her exquisite, royal,
Saraswati petals
I wait blushing with bated anticipation
for a whiff of Heaven itself
We are celibate now
the sweet rivers that
once ran between our thighs
have dried up....
gutted fish lie panting on
shores littered with
caviar and vacant,
abandoned oyster shells
girding up our *****
we begin the arduous,
formidable, slippery, icy
ascent to Mount Kailash
Your soulful, blue eyes
merge with the
azure heavens above
our arms linked together
You whisper warmly
"Ready Mama?"
I take a deep mystic breath
surrendering to the vast call within
"Yes Papa..."
Beloved

My lips linger enrapt
near Your ambrosial feet

Bitter tears silken into
nectar streams

Lotus petals blossom
between the rocks and pebbles
of my heart

You clasp white wings of my soul
to Your flushed *****

And my trembling breath melts
with the stars, suns, galaxies
spinning madly, wildly, endlessly
inside Your luminescent Gaze
Wild amethyst morning glories awaken by the sea
an avalanche of white waves rush to the shore
zebra shadows dance across
the phosphorescent beach
and God's heart beats inside the
transparent chest of a jelly fish

I listen to the ocean sing
cresting jeweled tides
crescendo
rise and fall
our footprints and all we think we are
vanish
without a trace

Love's ineffable breath
sweeps me out to beauty
In shimmering ebb of
evening's closing tide
I kneel and kiss
Your jeweled footprint
above a trillion super stars
illumine the temple dome
and a crescent moon floats
near the crown of my head
I've forgotten my name
and the way home
long ago washed out to sea

there is no existence apart
from You

I wander the dazzling shoreline
a cobra draped around my neck

I am Shiva
the thousand petaled One
We walk towards light
of the Winter sun
blades of grass shiver
in their green skins
Pine laughs and shakes
his bristol whiskers
dapper red cardinals
chortle "cheer, cheer, cheer,
pretty, pretty, pretty"

Our hearts begin to warm
My grandson Alex said something very profound and intriguing after his graduation ceremony.

I was complaining about how thin my hair had become and blamed it all on growing old. Alex looked at me with quizzical eyes partially covered by a mop of black sheepdog hair and declared,
"Well, Grandma you are an old lady."
I gave him a piercing look and said,
"True, but, remember this: The Soul is Eternal."

In that moment, my 14 year old grandson said that I reminded him of an old lady living in an off-the-beaten road shack. As I listened to him and the evocative images he spun I took the liberty of embellishing his description:

"Hidden by a dense patch of wild crafted herbs, a hint of mint, diamond needles darning their way around the bucolic scenery, a peculiar little hut comes into view.

The round oculus amethyst windows appear as portholed eyes to another world. If you pause and listen keenly you can distinctly hear the hum of otherworldly chants echoing from its eaves. Indeed, everything about this strange occult cottage exudes magical charm, you'd think it was inhabited by a priestess or something of that nature.

Slowly, I open the creaking door, puffs of rose moss incense and pooja camphor burn in small brass pots. Countless multi colored bottles, all different shapes and sizes, antique knick knacks, curiosities crowd the musty shelves. And a soft, rainbow mist floats through the room. This enigmatic Shack oozes wisdom......My Granny, her hair thinning, bits of silver creating a halo of stars, welcomes me. She gazes at me with a wise, weathered elderly smile while applying a red *** *** dot on my third eye and says:

"You know Alex the Soul is Ageless."
I clutch my mala beads close to my heart
Each rosary  pressed between my fingers and
Chanted by lips
an enchanting love song
Drawing You nigh
How easy it is to forget
Like yesterday or even
The day before
A foggy dream we struggle
To remember
Your Name breathes
Life into everything
and makes it
real
I smiled in The Woodlands
fresh, sweet as the
scent of pine wafting
through forest boughs

A sense of rejuvenation
and yes! jubilation!
danced with the amber shadows
verdant panorama

Gratefully, I rested my head
against a soothing tree trunk and...
listened to its heartbeat
I belong to the woodlands
tall pine look down with
sheltering glances
their emerald crowns
caress the heavenly blue dome
Winter sun is a bright Jewel
through the branches
air is sweet and fresh
a sleepy wind blows
across my face
And if it weren't
so late in the afternoon
I just might snooze here
on a bed of pine needles
but instead I rouse myself
and sing a song of gratitude
Warm rays of the sun
like fairy wings flicker
through tall majestic branches
I spread my rose print scarf
over a couch of
golden pine needles
and settle down  
the forest sings its
own haunting melody
undaunted by our
industrial embrace
It gives life to our limbs
our very breath
O beloved trees and
sacred wildwood
hugs and kisses
the Divine mother will
surely protect you
There is prana in the woodlands
sparks of divine energy
glisten between each breath
I feel His original breath
surging through me
vital, electric, Cosmic
The spark that
started everything
I smile blissfully resting
on His sunlit chest
He ties the flower of His love
wild roses and baby's breath
to my wind blown fairy tendrils
shadows cast
we roam about searching
for a glimmer of light

puppets shadow boxing
on a back alley wall

the shadow of death haunts
our every step
with a grim resolve

yet disappears as we rotate
ever so slowly
towards the blinding truth
boundless radiance
inexhaustible love

where the Great Central Sun
rises beyond
the shadow of a doubt
I love my little Buddha husband
sometimes I watch him as he naps
his face assuming the soft delicate
lines of a child or an angel
asleep on God's *****

I observe him in the garden
through the glass patio door
reflective light of the noonday sun
splashing gold over his bent form

Gently he snips fragrant rose blossoms
arranging a charming feng shui bouquet
for our kitchen counter

Cuddling close and cozy on our
chocolate brown love sofa
as evening casts a starry
love spell

I Thank God for such a
blessed and sacred life and especially
for my little Buddha's delight

— The End —