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sharetheword May 2020
Why do I have to think about you
Why does my mind do this to me
Why you
Even when I know its not good for me
Even when I know I shouldn’t
It's you
How can I do I choose the most emotionally unavailable person
When I myself am empty, drained
I give and give
Even when I know I shouldn’t
But I can’t help it
I try to stop myself
From getting hurt, damaged further
But it's like an automatic response
To show you love and care
Like I know you’ve never really had
And the ****** up thing?
You deserve it
So much
Even when you annoy me to no end
I only want to show you what you’ve never had
And give that to you
Despite the potential fear of how bad I will hurt,
The pain I will feel.
I want you to be mine.
But that?
Up to you.
sharetheword May 2018
You slink through the grass like a snake
Watching me as I walk, oblivious
To your plot, your chase, your capture
And then you attack.
Lunging at me, sinking your teeth into me.
I cry out in pain, shocked
You bite harder as I cry,
And I swear I can almost hear you laughing.
As you let go, I find myself numbing to the pain of your sting
Yet at the same time,
Wishing for another bite.
Despite the hurt, why do I feel charmed that it was me you preyed upon?
This is how my last relationship felt - painful, toxic love.
sharetheword May 2018
We live in a current world where mental health is more important than ever.
Anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medication, sleeping pills.
Why must we depend on prescriptions to appease our emotions?
We have to be careful to not let these take over, but they already have.
Instead of treating these methods as a crutch to get through life, we must tread cautiously.
Taking ownership of our problems and worries are incredibly hard.
Believe me, I understand that. I’ve tried various methods to try & fix myself too.
But instead of numbing ourselves to the pain, we must face it.
You are not your anxiety. You are not your depression.
We can accept that these things are present in our lives without it consuming our identity.
I cannot stress how vital it is to release yourself
From negative people, toxic environments and even objects.
I know its easier said than done, but we’ve got to start somewhere.
How about we get hooked on truly discovering ourselves?
sharetheword Dec 2017
It comes in waves

Not my love for you or the idea of you in my life

But the pain, the hurt, the anger

That I have worked so hard to get through

And then it comes up and I am reminded that is, truly, embedded within me.

Its okay to feel

Its okay for your heart to have the weight of the heaviest anvil

Its okay for that burden to sit with you.

Just don’t let it crush you.

You are strong and that is beautiful.

Feeling pain means being able to feel happiness.

You must move on knowing that the pain you carry will never effect him the way it did you.

— The End —