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Father Jul 2018
Um basically that I'm not crazy that she's being rediculous  and selfish and legit tell me I'm right not dismiss it like oh how about we try and work with her even more then what I just sent u and have her make it even more difficult on me u all think it so easy I get off work at 9 no way I could take him to school and my son will want to see his family at my house not just Legoland everyone always thinking of themselves and **** one day I won't be here and then everyone will see how far I was pushed and how hard. I worked and how hard I tried and when that happens itll be too late because I'll be gone u have ur kids u have ur husband Stephen does everyone has someone I legit am all I have so the only kind of love I get to where I feel like I'm needed is my son he's all I have and what keeps me going but Jesus iv been fighting like a maniac for almost 6 years now to keep him in my life and sacrifice my health my happiness my everything just so I can pay child support and try to get him as much as I'm able outa of pure selfishness no one gets it no one trys to get it everyone is focused on everything else to really see what's going on u have no idea how many times I write my good bye letters to everyone but stop when I get to my son because I legit can't and won't and absolutely refuse to leave him alone with that ***** and that selfish family all he has but Jesus dude I'm not super man I get **** from everyone in every direction and constantly get told and made to feel like I'm hated and everything else when I legit do so much for everyone and care so much about everyone and the one thing I have my happiness is my child my son and I never get to even take him for more than a day and I'm dead tired because I work my *** off to distract myself from my ****** existence and misserey I've been thru hell and back my entire life and I'm stronger because of it but no one understands that my laughter my smiles my jokes my comedy is to distract me and everyone else to the reality that I'm on the verge of death the verge of giving up the verge of loosing hope the verge of saying goodbye to the one thing that deserves so much more than I could give my baby boy my hero my heart my soul my everything my pride and joy how happy I was to find out of his creation and ready I was to bring the beautiful blessing to the world into my life how ready I was to be there and watch the miracle of him every step every laugh every tiny amazing miracle of him growing and learning and I've had all the dreams all the hope  to be there and deserved to be there still deserve to be there and missed so much of his life because of a evil hateful selfish heartless demon that manipulated my mind my actions and my heart and took what strength I had and fed on it with pleasure and sick love for destroying my soul I'm living in hell and the demon that is evil has fed clawed and ****** away my will to the point where I'm just a dim light of what I was born to be and have the potential to be the light is almost out and my little savior my baby boy is left with nothing but a shadow a like a belief that his protector didn't care and wasn't there and the demon will feed him nothing but lies and hate and fill him with nothing but hate and  resentment and confusion and anger until his sweet Innocents vanishes and light starts to dim and left to feel all alone this is as deep as it gets do I share this do I send this questions I am left with do I open up and cry for help scream for help problem is I've been screaming for years and I'm trapped so far into the darkness that no one can see or hear the crys the begging and pleading for it to end save me Help me someone but there's no one just me my miracle and the demon trying to devour what's left of my soul and diminish me from existence and tarnish and manifest itself to become the very image of me and my baby boy will look at me as nothing but the very  demon  that left him without a father as the demon feeds him the darkness I left behind the memory of me will be nothing but a random thought that will be covered up by lies and fear and resentment in my child's eyes because the demon is now me in my child's eyes and that's when the demon wins that's when the demon is finally full not after I'm gone but when the last bit of love or light I leave behind is replaced with itself and my baby boy thinks of me as nothing but the very demon that destroyed me then just maybe then the demon will win cause now the demon is my son's mother the only one there and becomes the hero and I become the demon in his eyes I'm lost I'm afraid I'm alone and begging and pleading for it to change to end to stop in the end if hell is for ever and if I'm in hell and it really is for ever then the only thing I'll be wanting or screaming or hoping is for it to end to stop to cease to exist in the end my enemy is not the demon feeding on my soul it's the never ending pain and suffering the forever the continue the hope the urge to keep going in the end my enemy is time and the only way I can stop time is to take my self out of the equation and the light that is left the life the will to live goes out dies disappears and leaves nothing but a void and darkness like it never existed good bye is close and hope is lost my will is gone nothingness is where I'm headed my little miracle is all that keeps the light inside my soul lit the flame is low and I'm affraid that it won't last or make it
Comment
If I could write my thoughts
You may not quite understand
For the words we are stapled with
Seem ridiculously bland

Music flows like colours to beat
Hypnotising my soul, sparking my senses
Controlling my body I'll jump to my feet
Unimportance of visuals like seeing through lenses

If emotionally moved why not be 'fantabulous'
Eyes closed I see clearer and all is so peachy
Bisto relates to Sunday but life is better gravy
Grey Monday's depress but not 'Grey..You get me?

Just separate your instincts of colours and such
Words are just letters You'll see in a bit
Brains installed with viral fake mush
Some never stray from the path of life's Pit

So blasphemy like '*******, **** and ****
Bad letters because swearing is ...wrong?
The four letter 'C' word the worst though admit
Cos **** is just letters made worse for too long

Sue is my name all over the world
Yet Mum can be Mom, Dad, Pa, Pere
If taught **** for Mum wisdom are not pearls
Red is not hot blue is not cold transparent unclear

So simply my mind see's what's gone so wrong
To un -train what's been taught like losing a limb
People are 'Crazy' to not follow and conform!
Don't get the page yet? read on its no sin

Fantabulously individually Humans
My DNA matches no others so why  march to the tip TOP beat
How beautiful we are 'ALL' Races of humans, Us
The recent power crazed gave racism a ******

****, Racism, diets, Religion
War, Rich, Poor, just made up words
Humans empathetic risers to imagine
No hate, selfishness, Malice in Humans that's Absurd!

Do we find Racial abuse amongst Dogs, Cats and such
So many species but a ***** is a ***** regardless of colour
Rabbits in the wild don't live in a hutch
Straying the point lets try to mull over

From born colour coded, numbered and named
Associated colours, Pink Girls, Blue Boys
Lemon and white if scans are waylaid
Colours are just preferences or visual noise

Taught to be the best you can be
Strive to the top, the higher, the best
Already are wedging the You and the Me
Hang on..Oh look.. I come from the 'West'

How hard to be taught to embrace our uniqueness
Respect, Love and cherish the short time we're here
Selflessly love, change this bare rotten bleakness
Humanity release this dark You enslave

No rich or poor just balanced and happy
Heinz not for me still love store brand
Caviare Hallooga Ballooga, Whatever, Really?
If not jisting my drift now... You're not of this land!?...


All I'm saying is we are all unique so live life to the full, embrace love and happiness, help others where you can, be selfless, respect costs nothing as does a smile, no need for fad dieting, embrace your unique self, let's strive to make Humans be the best we can be but embrace the journey together, life is not a competition or a race, beauty can not be visualised or bought, true beauty 'can' be the ugly ducling surrounded by selfish nasty swans.  Feel the love in all Humans globally.  The one's who lead us at the tippedy top have been hypnotised by some othre in-humane greedy, selfish sub species, who I shall name the darkness and unknown fear we only feel, because remember to visualise is irrelevant to our existence , it's through our feelings, fears and thoughts they attack first, causing panic amongst the trustworthy of our so called Governments.  If they all wanted the best for us then by al means pull together as ONE Government, but to diminish the value of money is just a way of controlling us, keeping the rich rich and richer and making the poor the lowest, ,maybe now homeless **** in society we all feel uncomfortable around?  If all houses cost the same, all wages paid the same rate and no unnecessary taxes to park a vehicle, drive the vehicle, toll costs when in the same country and no tax on wages...What they spending that **** on? We already pay tax on the area we live, yes roadworks, police, fire crews, New Homes even, street improvements have to be funded by tax to pay wages... fair enough.  No taxing us on our hard worked, underpaid jobs that we lose blood sweat and tears over and lets face it 3/4 of that goes back into the government with tv licence, overpriced food, tobacco, extortionate fuel companies conning you out ya money with standing charges and charging you more kw for the £ on the ever gracious £5-8 emergency they put on pre payment machines.  Then If your lucky enough to have worked and lived an average life you can buy your own house which you pay of untill your pension years.... god forbid you need residential care if u lose your mind or you can kiss your financial future for your kids cos that care don't come under the good old NHS.... and is soooooo over priced and understaffed by mostly aliens of society that the government take the house and money to pay for their care???? ******* rediculous.  And of course when U die you have to pay a % of the value of that house to the government.....for?? Yea what the **** for? My house? Go **** yourself!...The free bus pass don't cut it, the discount priced fish and chips DON'T cut it!!

You know the thing that grates me the most? TV Advertisements, e.g Washing powder ads.... 10 years ago it removed 'all' stains and made whites whiter than white... now 10 years on and Fantabulously new and improved with colour protection and stain, bomb, bullet proof...Yes you have guessed it, makes whites 'even' whiter! ha.. white is white it don't get whiter.....all scams for money....stick a trusted celebrity in the ad....and you could sell chocolate teapots to the masses...

My Motto..... Eat well, live life, embrace our imperfections cos perfection is unreachable, unachievable and installed into us to get more money, more power, more **** knows?  Don't be ruled by the soldiers and the puppets of society, believe in what you like and respect that others may not always agree with you but we are entitled to our opinion, not everyone is going to agree, that's what makes us different, never seen a war starting over country A likes coffee Country B likes Tea....lets go to war to battle it out....Make war against the law... would solve asylum seekers, ad that god dam racism word, bring back golly Wogs and baa baa black sheep...ridiculous...my childhood was when thatcher was in reign.... oh how the man 'o' species let 1 woman come into power and claim she ****** it..... anyway straying again...Wake up People Freedom is lost,  lets not let them take our souls too!!
Richard Riddle Dec 2015
I've been asked by our son and the grandchildren, Evan and Emily, "Granddad, what would you like to have Santa bring you for Christmas?" A stock answer with grandparents nearly everywhere is, "Don't get me anything, for I have everything I need or want, so save your money."
Although this is a true answer, I usually give some kind of a rediculous answer like, "A pair of horseshoes would be nice." They smile, laugh, but it wouldn't surprise me if they bought a pair.
When I say, "I have what I want", I mean just that. For you see, my family, our son Russ, daughter-in-law, Mea, Evan and Emily, and my "Guardian Angel", "Brie", are my Christmas gifts, 365 days a year.

I can't ask for more than that!

copyright: richard riddle- 12-21-2015
David Watt  Sep 2010
Kayleigh
David Watt Sep 2010
Her honesty is a thing thats rare,
a thing that causes most to stare.
Strangers hear of her akward jokes,
that may be acceptable around only blokes.

The smile that can lighten the dimmest of days,
only surpassed by the music she plays.
She gives and gives till she cries from stress,
which sends me into rediculous distress.

I cannot stand to see you sad!
for without you with me i look mad!
So heres to my friend,
who follows only her own trend!
Kay your great!
and a fantastic mate!
ArturVRivunov Oct 2011
I saw a gentle face looking through my eyes, and they said to me don't think about it twice. . .
Just look back into my eyes and I'll show you a deeper place. . .The life is not a silly place, for in my time I lived within my place. . .Now I'll show you that deep embrace your eyes long for.
Then that gentle face took me to a place where life's but in pace without digrunted haste. Senses guided this gentle face, showed me how to fight it, and I took it willingly, my new strength betrothed from her gentle brace. My gentle face I became to embrace as only fresh breath of air.
I became to know it so, when I glance back what in my time I felt but such a waste, when all it was were just few silly moments, when my heart sank and I couldn't show this feeling with about a face in blanc. But then came a reason for what in life could be my please on, for I was missing this gentle face present in mine. Until funny as to how long ago I wrote this, to only finish in this moment when I have run into this gentle face. Pondering her embrace in this life I feel without her a waste, but I know and feel her daily smile, her tiring heart at times like mine when I feel the world is falling apart.
Her gentle face overrides the feeling grief, for if I was to feel sad, it is always brief.
I only long so much a day for when the time comes, we together, get to play.
Darling, your gentle face in front of me sways me in ways I have only imagined. To say so now how I felt this moment and now this moment I had found it. Your gentle face I saw in time when mine was less profound, it give me a feeling joy so far from how I imagined, for your gentle face I feel it to never wonder from it, into oblivion because from how far I saw it to now how much I love it.
I believe in love and it's how I lived it, but never seeing that there would be another. I never felt to loose my sight for I have felt you, from afar glowing within the night. Adults and others feel lost to love, feeling time in age, to be only put down by something they don't feel in life they can't anymore engage. How could we lovers loose sight of life adventure, ceised by today's life on its venture. Today's affections all but tend to misperfections and everyone seized in mind to love themselves creating such perfections, to only show but never feel.
Oh! How I look into your gentle face and feel for it in every place. To even look into another, it's pointless within my pace. For there is no such face I could find within your embrace. I am your face, for how much I feel we fit in place.
To yours mine always ventures, through clouds of clamour where life is but lost in glamour. No one see's a subtle moment, where time passes between the two, because their always distracted away from two, to always wonder about around them, whome is who, what looks upon our face embraces. And in most cases, they loose their loving laces, that tie together of what you and I do share.
For when I looked into a gentle face, your trully in spirit, since now my heart can clearly hear it. Since our first embrace, together in one place, my heart explode it, this sound so melodious. Yours trully listened and mine just glistened, the sound of perfect. This melody, all I could and only hear, to it to only add in new sound you in me but steer.
The soothing melody of you and me sitting beside each other on our first walk where all the chatter around us but was talk. While I felt in your wonder moment, swamped by your mesmirizing glow.
There was no other place I felt to go but to your heart. The funny thing you told me in moment of rediculous it didn't mean to me a thing of any sort particulous. I only felt to hold your hand and feel your lips with such lovely words. Sitting on that busy metro, my life changed with in large retro, a spect in life I felt to wonder when all for me would be a calm no matter where I felt I stood in warmth, your love swarmed over me by strength, if so this train had hit a wall I would have gathered in my strength to break your fall. . . . .. . .
Matt Jursin Dec 2009
What, you think this earth belongs to you?
Dont act like your **** dont stink. ***-eww.
We sabotaged and stole this land...
Poorly planned.
Tried hard to **** off all the native peeps.
Became the kind of company that misery keeps.
**** of the earth.
We dont need a world-wide police.
Need this new-world-order like we need a new disease.
Watch out, keep eyes peeled.
Catch you slippin, might take away the rest of the freedoms you feel.
Trade MY Rights for YOUR lies?
C'mon, get real, no deal.
Masonic traditions so ritualistic.
Right in front of our eyes!
Rediculous.
So sadistic.
No such thing as ugly beauty inside.
No morality.
No empathy.
No unity for human kind.
All pride.
All pompous politicians peddling for bribes.

Question everything.
Humans lie and decieve and try to change your beliefs...
For selfish reasons that you may or may not see or believe...
Michael P Smith Mar 2013
God has given us the earth
To take up refuge
But yet in all staidness
In this home of ours
We human beings
Have been very poor tenants
Take a look around
Scope out the view
Our dying ionosphere
From our constant pollution
Our disengaging ozone layer
Which protects us
From the sun's burning rays
When they someday disappear
From existence
We will all be doomed
Becoming trillions of pieces
Of human bacon
On a global skillet
Take another good view
Of our plants and animals
What all they do for us
And what we lack to do for them
We have killed so many
Many which have met extinction
Our precious plants and animals
Are leaving us one by one
Day after day
Year after year
Soon we will have nothing
Left to our name
Even the water
Is becoming unsafe to ingest
Some places it has been that way
For centuries of time
But why is it hard for us
To remedy
To refresh
To replenish
Our only home
One we can never move from
Why destroy so much life
When we can make it better
Oil is scarce
Natural gas rises from asphalt
Everything is dying
And soon so will we
Change will never come
The damage is done
Oxygenation is so depleted
Soon will be no resources
For us to live off of
Because our dishes aren't clean
Our rooms are so *****
Our floors need vacuuming
Our walls peel valuable paint
Our vents are clogged dramatically
In the air lives dangerous molecules
Speckles of death floating airborne
Also we further the damage
To our already destroyed home
By the chemical warfare
The biological weaponry
Created by the minds
Which are here to help keep up
The exuberance of our home
As does the war of countries
Our rediculous governments
Ensuring war upon us
So called humble housekeepers
Which allow blood and destruction
To overtake our abode
To make our predecessors
Turn in their graves
To make our God *****
A sandstorm of anger and disgrace
We don't deserve to live here
We have not pleased him
We have not pleased each other
We have only inflicted damage
And so much pain
To our home
God deliver us please
Bring us up to par
Or this corrupted home
You gave us to live in
Will be dead and gone forever...

©Michael P. Smith
Santiago  Nov 2015
Underneath
Santiago Nov 2015
I wont beg, i wont insist
I wont lift a finger, i just wont
Maybe being cold hearted
Finally finish what I started
I feels stupid after searching
And no ones there, no one cares
Im the only one thats actually there
While everyones being happy
Im stuck lost asking some one
Who never cared love was never there
God please help me for get this person

That only thinks about herself
Whos selfish, stubborn, and apathetic
Self centered doesnt consider friends
Let me be the same cold hearted
Numb to the point where i wont feel
Lord help me break free
A woman with no heart
I bet lives and dwells in the dark
Please Lord I feel rediculous
I bet shes permiscuous too
Guide me God i despise woman
Who disregard broken hearts
I hate you.
Angel Groman Apr 2013
i dont know what to do, i feel so lost and nothing i do seems to help me in this struggle, you dont seem to give me the respect and love i deserve,i dont think you understand how much that hurts me, because all i want is all your love and attention and kindness, but you kind of make it seem like im not worth your time, all i do is love you and talk about you,and am super nice to you,i have done so much for you its rediculous, and all i ask in return is that you respect and love me the way i deserve, and i know thats not too much to ask for, especially after all the things i have done for you and bought you, like that really nice and really expensive guitar! i have never once asked you to buy me something, because i dont want your money, all i want is you, and all of your sexyness and perfectness and your love especially, so please take that into consideration next time you want to be rude to me, and think does she really deserve this, because i dont!!! i love you sooo much ok, but i want you to love me too!! <3
this is not a break up note, because like i promised, i will never break up with you, no matter what, i love you sooo much! <3
Josh Koepp  Jan 2013
Something
Josh Koepp Jan 2013
I exist behind my words
I swear I'm trying but the light burns the eyes
Of every coherent thought I devise
So they cower behind my molars
Little men with puffed up shoulders
Shaking from fear, I know its absurd
But bear with me, its rediculous
But hear me out
I swear they're little soldiers
of intelligence but cowardice
Who know not of their own prowess
who only know of tooth brushes
Yes I brush my teeth to rid myself of the shaking
The quaking of stupid little intellectuals
Begging to be let out,
Imagining hypothetical situations of triumph
Only in reality met with silence
Because the unintelligible break the dental barrier
Much more often than comprehensible
Logical witty and thoughtful even attempt tooth warfare
And all that happens is a stutter
Because my little intellectual insurrectionists
Cowering from the light
cannot see the others flying in the air
Not lying in wait
I hope one day I can say something wrong enough to scare them out.
Hallie Bear Jul 2012
I'm a rediculous miscreant
Wandering open walks

People ask what color my hair is
How should I know?
The things that concern them are trivial

I'm higher than that
In all senses of the word

Floating above the bobbing crowns
Of the general public

I'm a popped bubble gum
Sugar-sweet, a mouthful and childish

Burbling along
A nerve of bundles

The drowsy doe-eyes
Sprung
Eyelashes high-kick when I bounce by
Being a stupid teenage girl never felt so good.
N Jan 2015
I guess this is as real as it gets.
I stared at this blank page for a while trying to figure out how I wanted to express myself to you.
The easiest way to get my thoughts flowing was playing that Hedley song you once sang to me while we layed together on the black couch in my living room.
That couch isnt there anymore. Neither are you.
But it's that moment sits in my mind as though someone etched it there permanently and I can time travel back to that moment as soon as I hear the piano playing.
I remember how funny it was that you couldn't sing. But at the same time it was amazing that you remembered every lyric to that song and looked me in the eyes as if you meant every single word.
Ironic isn't it how it had to do with not letting me go.
Ironic that even if it sounded crazy, you were gone 2 months later.
I guess I should of seen your lose grip on my hands as a warning sign that you weren't staying,
I wasn't enough to make you stay and I guess that's why 6 months later I still lay in bed blaming myself.
They say if you love someone let them go and that seems like the most rediculous thing to me because I loved you more than I've ever loved anyone and watching you leave was just as hard as standing unarmed in the middle of a shooting range.
As pathetic as it is, I just want you to know. I want you to know how much I hate you for hurting me the way you did.
I hate you for consuming my thoughts everyday. I hate you for thinking its okay to make me fall so deeply and just leave as though I was nothing; as though we were nothing.
Ending a poem is probably the hardest part. I don't know how I want to leave you feeling.
I'll just say this; if love is what we had, then I want nothing to do with it because someone that loves you shouldn't be able to leave you feeling torn in the middle of the night, they shouldn't leave you wondering what they did wrong in order to not be enough for you. I shouldn't feel like love is something that isn't meant for me, and that's how I feel every ******* day.

— The End —