am I clinically depressed
or am I just crazy

chemically imbalanced
motivationally challenged
or am I just lazy

attention deficit disorder
hyperactive distracted
interactive media addiction

progressive techno optimist
idealistic unrealistic
future obsessive affliction

am I terminally indecisive
or am I just manic

in need of professional help
to just get over myself
or should I just panic

am I clinically depressed
or am I just crazy

in the dead of night
it always feels like
exhilaration
self hate leaves doubtful residue within me
it’s led me to deny god
how could he do such a thing to me
feelings equate the inferno of my past
to the blaze of my home
often thinking about how i did this
it’s my acceptance of less than love
that has created the deadly persona
practiced divination
to find the answers
of my self doubt
the stars say they shine for me
something in me doesn’t believe them
in me
the liar resides
happiness isn’t allowed
he’s dying though
i might be free soon