here comes that feeling
I thought I'd forgot -
the heavy weight sinking
into the hollow body of
constant dreaming, that distracts me
from the fear of confronting the
issues deep inside.  

neither can I move it or it be removed.
fixed is it to my lonely self that pulses
large or small. it lets me go fly
then let's me fall. it's consuming.
can I feel
something else please? I'm pleading.
the pain of living is not forgiving
and I'm fighting the urge to give up
on breathing as this weight is sinking.

should I keep on believing? I ask these questions
as I am not one that knows. I know not much in the years I have lived other than
love
keeps the world spinning.
but I've seem to have forgotten
that feeling too.
oh I beg of you to break me as destroying
is one way of my body tingling
and that's better than staying numb.

I want to slow dance with you again
Watch the dim light mask your skin in the twilight
To feel your hazel gems as they waltz into bliss.
How ignorant one can be when all they see is you.

New Year's Eve
is it really a new start?
same antique feelings,
same broken heart,

same spinning head,
same lost soul -
is there much point
of holding on at all?

but this year will be better,
my hanging head will rise.
I will not let this fool
of my sorrow lead to my demise.

and so new year please
bring on the challenge.
with it i will grow,
create a new life to follow.

to love is part fear and devotion.
the fear someone near could
stop a gear in motion.

but trust in them to keep open
to the progression of your
ambition.

to grow and to compose
a life of peace and happiness
in a world full of sadness.

to love is an intense emotion.
but do not restrain, love
makes gain and oblivion.

my piercing scream into the darkness
is one that now hurts
my own ears.
can it be heard by you
or
is the thin vale of a smile
too easy believe while you ignore
my pleading eyes?

God I wish the words
I want to hear you say fell
out of your mouth
onto my lap where
I can take them and feed them to my
lonely soul.

your eyes are glistening,
as I'm patiently listening
to the sweet melody of
your preaching.

you're seeing right
through me or so I think,
if I think too hard I might just
blink and miss the sight of
the rosy pink lips that
roll like waves on a calm ocean.

I'm stunned by your motion.
an angel of heaven.
the way I speak of you
is like a fable. but how can I not
when I am unable to envision
anyone more perfect than your
beauty.

a collision of wonder
and sense fill my mind
with confusion and passion.