Pass behaviors
Present regrets
Realized when at the mirror I stood
I have to live with myself
And I want to be someone good to know
When I look at myself
I don't want to tear up
I want to be able to smile and say well done

Finding my way
In a dark place
Alone in the rain
I don't want to fight this one alone
I stand here crying in the rain and it isn't apparent to anyone but me
Stabbing pain to the core of my soul
Just enough to make me give up
But I keep walking
Not knowing where I will end up
Still crying
The rain is my tears
Every drop exposes my fears
I'm drenched
But no longer confused
I wipe my face
As the rain stops
And I enter the building
Adjusting myself for work

My palms are facing up
My fingertips reach toward the heavens
Open like a book
My life story can be read
Flipping through the pages
Treasures unfold
A life undiscovered
With mystery Intrigue
Filling in gaps
And finding traps
Hidden doors
Leading nowhere
Bookcases with rooms behind them
What kind of life was this
Secretive

Paint a picture
Of the night
Color it with
A pencil bright
For the moon is shining
And the stars are many
Twinkling and winking goodnight
Sprinkle the sky with white puffy clouds
With blue tones hanging above
Finish it with wind blown trees
That dance
As their shadows make silhouettes
In windows
While we sleep

Speak gently to me
For I am weak  When we embrace
I see more than just a mere man
Who stands tall
And is very pleasant to gaze upon
When I hear your voice it echoes through my soul
Making me feel so grateful
That you are mine to behold
Your walk is something to be desired
Effortlessly moving
Gracefully
As no other
A gift you are
To me
Thank you

Earth has no sorrow
Heaven can't heal

Visions I see
I can't sleep
Eyes wide open
In the dark
Laying watching
Trying to sleep
Listen to nothing
But my heart beat
The day ahead is planned for
People I might meet there are words for
Mistakes that may be made are dealt with
In the corners of my mind
Twisting turning
Trying to get comfortable
I'm to hot, now I'm cold
When will this end
I decided to stay awake
Discovering I can determine how my day goes
It occurs to me my attitude needed adjusting
In order to have a fruitful day
So as I laid there in the dark
I rehearsed what I might say
I practiced smiling
Instead of frowning
Laughing instead of doubting
Just being agreeable
Even if I didn't want to
Mornings here
Dressing for the day
Made my way out
Can't wait to try it out
Good morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I said with a smile
As I preceded to get into my car
No one was there I was just practicing
I wore myself out practicing
When it was time to do it
I failed and said ***** it

River blue
A reflection of the sky
Makes me dreamy as I watch you flow by
I daydream of yesteryear
Wondering about my future near
As thoughts of happy places appear
And forgetting times of my wounded spirit
Dashing stones across you
Stepping in just above the knee
Loving the coolness
Feeling so refreshed
While the sun dances across a clear sky
Clean and fresh is the air
Bringing forth
Memories of the past
As new memories are formed
River Blue
I'll miss you
For the city is calling my name
But I shall return again
When I can no longer
Stay away from your beauty
river blue
A home away from home

I couldn't break free
From my misery
He said he loved me
I believed him
To my grief
I was just another woman
Another he would use for his pleasure
A game he played
An instrument he strums
This night I had enough
I packed my things and left
No goodbyes
No looking back
Far away did I go
To a place I did not know
Not a soul I knew
I dug a hole as deep as I could
And I buried every memory, all objects
Covered them with earth
I forgot on purpose
Never to remember again
I dug a grave
Throwing all in
Making room for new memories
And new found friends

Wished upon a star that fell from the heavens in rebellion
We think we know how this world runs
Not knowing we have been caught up in an illusion
Sipping death out of a can
Oh how tasty though
Eating food not fit for man
Eyes wide open
Yet asleep
Believing what the media says
Even when they can't speak the truth
The end is not yet
It is close
Especially close
Seeing all the men
Wanting to be women
How gross
A man is still a man
Even if he cut parts off and adds some
He can never be a woman
The nerve of him
The ends coming
I know it is
I hope you know it for yourself
Cause times not standing still
Moving quickly
So prophecy will be revealed

What do you do
When the one you need
Is the one you hate
How do you forget
The wrongs done to you
When they make an appearance often
How do you love
What's hurting you
Daily struggles
I wish I didn't have to concern myself with
I'm trying
Treat people like you want them to treat you
They  say
I make a  decision everyday to pay attention
To listen and not self impose
Could I get that same please
I make sure that others needs or taken care of
I watch
I pray
Before you can inform me
I ask you
I'm trying
What's hard is keeping this up
Because I'm tempted to give up
Perhaps that's just talk
It is
I can't
Even if  I wanted to
It is embedded in my being
Forever etched on my heart
I must persevere
Looking for that prize at the end

Have you ever been awaken
From the best sleep ever
When your eyes could hardly open
And you could barely speak
Have you ever had a partner
Whom with everthing clicked
But you quit
Have you ever been eating a hamburger while driving and you saw something
And out the window
it went
Have you ever been down the dead end street of life
Had to bag out turn around and rethink
Have you ever lost something you loved
Forgot about it
And it turned up years later
Have you ever thought about how many possibilities
Have you ever could produce
Me
No never

I look for peace
And tranquility
Just one day
To sit and admire
The things that make me smile
A time where I can reflect
On days gone by
An evening walk
Without cat calls
And mad dogs
Wake to the roasters crow
Fresh morning breeze
As the wind blows
The fragrance of the rose bush past my nose
In the garden
Humming birds
Butterflies
And my favorite flower
Red, yellow,  orange, and pink roses

Here and there but no where
Talking yelling but not heard
Busy not idle
Yet bored
Friends and family
So alone
Got all I need
Not poor
Still not content want more
Bellies full
My family is safe
Don't know what I'm missing
Can't see pass myself

I have enjoyed every moment of my life
Leaped out of airplanes
Ran down the street with bulls
Loved who I pleased
When I pleased
How I pleased
I'm exhausted
Lived selfishly
No concerned for my brother
Now age has caught up with me
Not one child of my own to help me
My hair is grey
My steps have shortened
And my body is broken
Sad though it may seem
I speak of this only as a warning
To the young                    
But I'm not looking back
I have made my peace
With my maker
If for any reason
My body totally fails me
That's okay
Death is welcomed

I am a woman
Forgotten by society
A mother
Without a husband
I'm hardened by circumstances
Wounded by voices
Inferior to authority
I am alone
I could neglect my responsibility
And make a go of it
But the fear of that taunts me
So I stand and brace myself
I searched for help
I found it on my knees
Most High gave me hope for tomorrow
And strength for today
A promise to hold onto
While He prepared the way

The flowers are so beautiful
Their fragrance so sweet
Everyone stops to admire the beauty of The Most High's pretty flower
Flowers don't boast of their magnificent hues
Because without Him it could not be
So the flower awakes every morning with the sun
To praise its Maker
And say thanks

I have a remedy
For the down times
Just smile
Even if you can't see your way clear
Just smile
Even though it hurts while your here
Just smile
Letting this time pass knowing
It's gonna pass
So
Just smile
Don't fear
Trying times get worse
Before they get better
The midnight hour is always the hardest
Seems like you want make it
Keep holding on
Be strong
And smile
You made it

Beauty you wear so well
It becomes you
All dressed in bright white
With a touch of green
Ahh
And what is that scent
So delightful
A pleasure to my nose
A sight to be hold
JASMINE

Sunny days
The earth is happy
Smiling big
So bright
Silent are the storms
The dark clouds cannot be seen
The earth is still
Calm
This day enjoy and pray
For tomorrow we know not of
But just be thankful
For this sunny day
That is upon us

I love you
When the sun doesn't shine
I love you at any given time of the day
I love you in the color blue and in the rain
I love you at the close of the day
I love you at dawn
When the day begins and the sky is red
I love you here
I love you there
I love you everywhere
I love you all the time
Your always on my  mind
I Love You

Come to my garden
To see what you can see
A place to imagine
A place where dreams do come true
Make sure you bring a basket
To fill until your heart's content
An overflow of goodness is what you will get
Come along now
Let's enter my garden
Through the gates of hard candy
Jewel tones all around
Chocolate mushrooms sprouting
Lollipop bushes
Candy apple trees
Juice fountains
And Turkey sandwich flowers
All lined up
Dream with me
Just for a moment
And think how a little girl or little boy would feel
Who had empty bellies
I dream for them
I feel for them
And dream land is now open to all dreamers

Humming birds
Are unique little creatures
Long beaks
Tiny bodies
Fast as lightning
If you blink
You missed a chance to see a wonder
As it gets its nectar
In mid flight
Their wings never rest
I see them
And am always amazed
To see something
That's not suppose to be seen
Or so it seems

A Butterfly song
As it flutters along
With silent ease
Poetry in motion
Gently whispers
A silent tune
While in flight
It mimics the color wheel with different hues all about
And they dance and twirl
Fascinating all who watch
Just one of those things
We admire and love
Truly a gift from Heaven above

I took a long walk
To help clear my head
I turned to look around
And I fell into a hole
As I started back home
There was a lady walking towards me
I thought she was talking to me
Didn't know she was on the phone
How awkward
Got on my block
My house was just a few houses down
It had been raining
And there were puddles
My neighbor
Yelled to me
And I stepped right in the mud
I thought I needed to clear my head
But probably I  should have stayed in bed

Things look the same
On the surface
But if you zoom in
It's almost like some other world
Some dead place

I like to go outside
In the early morning
The air is fresher
I can think clearly
Songs from the birds are so sweet
I close my eyes and inhale and exhale
Getting every thing in sync
Noticing the red sky
When I'd been out for awhile
I stand in the wind letting it blow my hair to and fro
Reminising of days gone by
When I ran through the field of bluebonnets
Laughing and enjoying
The beginning of the day
The morning
When I awake
The windows up
The curtains are waving goodbye to the night
And my smelling senses are going crazy
For breakfast awaits me
The morning
So pleasant
So calm
I wish it could stay morning
All day
Just for one day
I love the mornings

Sober memories
In a stupor
Lost conquest
Fiddling with broken pieces
Of a relationship
Thought I would mend
It back together
And I might could
But some pieces
Wouldn't fit like they should
Causing some of the good stuff to leak out
It would still look broken
That's because it would be
For I was the only one
Who was trying to fix it

Better to be a branch of an old tree
Than the trunk of a dead one

The only reason I'm still alive
Is because I have no strength to die

Stayed up late night
AC broke
I was hot
Couldn't sleep
Went outdoors
To catch a breeze
It was slight  
Until around about midnight
Saw a shooting star
The sky was black
With specks of light
The birds were still singing
As the trees began to dance
The wind had picked up you see
I was refreshed
Tired and sleepy
So I told the Most High thanks for the wind
Said a little prayer
And went in

Another hot day
The suns shining
With all its might
Just a little breeze blowing
Hot streets look like pools from afar
People working outdoors
See the sweat drip from their noses
Too hot to play
The kids are inside
Mothers games await her children
Looking forward to evening
A red sky and the sun disappearing

Standing at a crossroad
Looking left then right
I didn't know which to go
Waiting for something
Not just to cross
But for someone to rescue me
For I was lost
I stood there
But no one came
I walked across
And began my journey all over again

Abandoned
Forgotten
Forsaken
A journey
Stteep hills
Jaggered edges
A lesson to be learned

Beautiful things can stand alone
Work on the inner you
Be kind
Be true

Some people you think will never die
Then their gone
??????????????

Hmm
I was thinking
And right as I began to think
Another thought harassed me
Hmm
Now I'm confused
What shall I do
Go the first way
Or the way of the harassing thought
Hmm
Detour or stay on the beatened path
First wins
I am back on track again

You live out of your heart
Not of wisdom
Your not ready to lead
Listen, watch
And pay close attention
And you will see
That most decisions made
Have nothing to do with feelings

Strenght is one you must rise up and meet
It will not come to you lying down
So stand to your feet
And let the journey begin