rey - Hello Poetry

rey Feb 2019

funny

Guess what is funny?

I'm not even sure if I loved you in the first place.

I honestly can not remember.

Those emotions are stored in a box

that I have not opened

since I closed it last.

I am sorry

you are meaningless

to me now

and stored away

in a box.

#funny #meaningless #sad

rey Feb 2019

Dark Rooms, Busy Minds.

The brightest light is shining through
hand sewn curtains
coming from a street-light
that stares me down while
I try to sleep.
The little red dot on my TV
stares me down
as insomnia carries
my weightless body
back to the thoughts of yesterday.
My thoughts are pointless
at 2 a.m.
worrying about what I'll wear
or what people will think of it.
The walls hold me in
a cage of senseless perception
as I try to escape
to my far-off land
of dreams.
The monsters under my bed
and the ones in my closet
snicker and giggle
at my brain that is
fearing if I'll ever drift
into sleep.
What I've realized is that
the monsters under my bed
are not there,
but in my head.

I've been listening to a lot of the '50s lately. Digging it.

#dark #sad #sleep #sleepless #tired #bored #stuck

rey Jan 2019

a little love

i want a little love
the kind you dream of when you’re a kid.
late night trips around town
with tired grins and sleepy eyes
full of adventure.
swinging on swings
when you’re both adults
without a care in the world.
weekend trips to the mountains
or to a lake we went to as kids.
i want a little love
that requires no effort
to love one another.
a guy who knows my intentions
and understands my complex self.
someone who remembers little things
i say and do.
i want a little love
that has flaws
so we can fix them together.
little arguments we can
laugh about later.
going to the movie theater
so we can sneak candy in
and laugh together.
i want someone who
knows how to love me
and cheer me up.
i want a little love
that doesn’t seem so little.
i want something that’ll last a lifetime.
i want memories to pass on.
i want to be that old couple
everyone aspires to be.
maybe this little love,
isn’t that little after all.

#love #future #little

rey Jan 2019

my words

let me touch your mind
with my words
i want to twirl them
around my pinky finger
and give them to you
i want to inspire
your actions
through beautifully
thoughtout speech.
i want to sprinkle
each letter
with a sliver of my heart
just so you’ll know
i mean them.
i want my words
to reach into the depths
of your soul
and touch each part of it
in a different way.
i want to give you
all my happy words
in exchange for
any sad words
you possess.

rey Jan 2019

again

i’m hurting myself, without realizing it...
again.

rey Jan 2019

control

I’ve lost control of my own body.
the sadness and despair that has shown up
has decided to stay.
my words don’t feel like my own
the slashes in my wrists
aren’t what I want
the burning in my soul
is flameless and smoky
I didn’t want this,
i want my control
i want MY control!
it’s my body,
but my brain
lost it’s reigns.
i’m scattered and messy
and i can’t do anything about it
the lack of motivation
to the lack of sleep
turned my normal life
into a living hell.
why has my life
become a hassle,
where is my control?

i can’t control
my feelings
because they’re
far too strong.
i can’t control
my fears
because fear
has overcome me.
i can’t control
my dreams
because they
left.

what have i become?

sorry i took a break from poetry because frankly i didn’t know what to write. i’m sorry. here’s one that took me a half hour to write while laying in my own tears :)