1
I see you, ya
I may be finger-punching
my smart phone at the dining table -
but darling, I see you, yeah
We’re seated at the table
you say something
but you think I’m listening to
Taylor Swift on Youtube
True - but hey,
I see ya, I hear you
I hear both of you
I multiply, I multi-task you see

2
I’m walking along the shops
I’m pushing the pram
with my baby inside
and I’m updating status
on the phone too
and getting that download –
but hey, stranger round the corner
I see you, ya, don't ya worry; yeah I see
my baby and I see you
stranger round the corner –
but hey, watch where your going

3
hey - I see you guys, I see you
no doubt all day I sit
in my couch tapping away
on my new supersize phone
but I’m smart hey – I see you guys
I see you my darling at the kitchen –
get me another coffee, will ya
And I see the kids glued to their sets
and little Toby our kitten
curled at my feet – why, thank you
for the coffee;
darling, can you
put a few cans of beer in the fridge –
see? I see ya, yeah…I see you all

we were deeply in love
my new girlfriend and I
and we sat under the trees
in the open fields in the starlight
and she whispered to me:
"Will things ever change?"
And I whispered back, as I nibbled at her ears:
"Nothing will ever change, sweetheart"

Then she got pregnant
and everything changed

I changed my address, my work
my phone number and my email address
my routine and my weekend haunts -
*everything changed

I got a hundred shoes
in pairs, of course
and a wardrobe fit for a Princess
I got the bed
carved with gold trimmings
from the best end of town;
and a range of the best wigs -
all human hair,
third world crop no doubt
but at first world cost for sure


that all took me into bad debt
credit card and all
so when debonair James
asked me to marry him
I grabbed him lips to lips -
now he's paying through his nose



MORAL of  TODAY'S POEM
so those of you guys
who are naive
you get caught;
those who are smart
you better use your head
before you put your knees on the floor

Mike said
I'm the prettiest girl
he's ever met
so I let him
jump in

Carl made me
feel special
he said he'd never seen
anyone so pure
so in the back of his car
I let hm in

Rob said he'd rob
the world, go to jail
do anything I told him to do
so in the garden
I let him plant himself in

George wrote poetry;
he described my eyes
and my face and my walk
and he said he'd love me
forever, it was destiny brought
us together -
could he see more, please?
So I let him do everything
so he could make divine poetry

*Now I can't find any
of these guys
and they don't return my calls -
what happened
to their fine words and promises?

so King Lion
summoned us for a meeting
and King sat on his throne
and before he started
the King looked in my direction
and he roared:
"Hyena - don't you dare laugh;
here in Council what we deliberate over
is no laughing matter"

And I ****** in my pants
(in a manner of speaking)
and sat throughout the meeting
trembling in fear, as it seemed
to the King -
but also because I had to keep
my suppressed laughter
rocking in my tummy
throughout the meeting

it's woman power here
in the clans of the spotted hyenas -
the women are bigger and the males fear;
fathers are kind to daughters
so at least the daughters will be nice to them

so women really just give orders
and the male hyenas obey
with mirth and laughter

Did you take the garbage out?
yeah, ha, ha, ha, yeah, yeah, yeah
Did you put the toilet seat cover down?
yeah, ha, ha, ha, yeah, yeah, yeah
Have you mopped the floor?
yeah, ha, ha, ha, yeah, yeah, yeah
Is dinner ready on the ground?
*yeah, ha, ha, ha, yeah, yeah, yeah

I hate school
because teacher Giraffe is always
picking on me
in his high and lofty manner
He's always pointing at me
with his prehensile tongue
and snorting: "Maybe you'd
like to stop laughing
and share your joke
with the rest of animal class?"

But I don't know no joke;
I just laugh

I went to this meeting
(when I was a kid)
of hyenas;
and the ritual
consisted mainly of laughing
and they laughed and they laughed -
you know, and I just didn't get it

I demanded an explanation -
but no fellow-hyena could explain it

everybody laughs
nobody knows why;
and now I am an adult hyena
and I just laugh -  *it's something to do
with survival, I think

so my little girl Joanne was sick
slight fever and just looking weak
so I took her to the doctor
a kind old man with a calm voice
and he looked at Joanne and he said:
"So what's bothering you, my dear?"

and Joanne answered
at lightning speed:
*"Anne, my little sis! She's always
wanting my lollies!"

"Give me a good reason,"
the exasperated gangster-father
quizzes his son,
"why you flunked your school exams"

"Well, dad,"* says the spoiled brat
*"they locked us all up in a hall
and they asked us questions
five days in a row -
but all five days I never
gave them a word
Everybody else - the cowards -
spilled the beans!"

1
you come home
and there's bill
(not your friend
but the bill from
your internet provider)
for your cellphone and such

you read your bill
and your son
has to call up the ambulance,
further increasing your bill

2
your 16-year-old daughter
tells you:
"I've got news;
good or bad
depends on how you look
at it: I'm 4-months pregnant -
and before you ask me -
I ******* don't know who"

3
Your grandpa comes back
with his I-just-met-her girlfriend
and she tells you
to move out
and stop sponging on an old man
Your grandpa nods in admiration
and says: "Good on you, girl
I never had the heart to tell him that"

4
The chicken you had for dinner
at the restaurant
(and enjoying which
you went "ooh-wow")
was actually snake meat
topped with dog paws and ears

5
The kid you turned away
in your Scrooge mood
with no treat at the door
stands now at 2 am
beside your bed
with his head in his hands

WARNING:  Horror*...Readers might find this poem offensive or distressing.
_____________­_


1)
I know
once I was just like you
I was young and furious too
the world was too much
everyone made you feel
so hopeless, you think you could ****
I know exactly
how you feel

Like the time
my parents kept on and on
about responsibility
I had to look after my things,
that made me mad

And then I decided
I must assure them
I would grow up to be responsible
make them feel confident
I must put them at ease
so I did

And the police asked me
if I knew where they'd gone
and I showed the cops my perplexity:
“They were always 
responsible
in everything -
 how could they
just go away 
and leave me like this?”

The police and lawyers searched the house
and they found the will -
my parents had left everything to me
and had put my siblings
neat in order
stretched out on the dining table
in the basement kitchen


2
Like the time
then at work
the colleagues went on
about responsibility
and they conspired:
I was irresponsible;
they were conscientious;
I was a freeloader
Ah, the judges in one's world

the judges of one's soul

and one day
they found a worker in a bad state
dead and lying naked in the clichéd
pool of blood –
in the toilet, of all places -
with the words: *“How irresponsible”
on the floor

Everyone was in a state -
I moved inter-state
I was going places


3)
Dear, oh dear

don't cry

Darling, oh darl

don't bleed

There was a time when I married
(everyone finds it's a mistake;
they either **** their partner
or, to continue living,
they **** their own spirit)
but I was determined to grow
my body and spirit -
can we not get conventional? -
so I had minced pie for a time
and no one could bring
my wife back home
you see
wifey got
too comfy
and see she had this thing
(after respectability)
about responsibility
the role of husband and father and
parent and homeowner, mow the lawn
service the loan
and all that crap –
I quite believe she was going mad;
maybe she walked away into the woods
Was that responsible of her?

Dear, oh dear

don't cry

Darling, oh darl

don't bleed


4)
I moved into the woods
built a little cabin, below the rocks
and covered by the trees;
yet I had visitors
who had come astray into the wilderness

Someone wanting space for the night:
“Is there enough room in your cabin?”
“Why,” I said, “there’s plenty all round”
I was vegetarian
but the destitute offered themselves to me -
the religious might say:
God fed me 
even in the wilderness! Ha!

A wandering woman one evening,
she offered love in return
for shelter that night
She let me lick, taste her flesh
“Bite me,” she said
offering a foretaste in our foreplay
Why would they not leave me? –
these wanderers, the intruding world

No, I had not come in like Thoreau
or the Unabomber – but maybe
like the misanthrope Timon of Athens...
afraid of my own hate; but the innocent
seemed to be drawn in as to a...an...abattoir



5)
And now here we are -
I have come into your space, your cell;
gates and doors
yield to my fingers, if you must know
(always good with my hands,
good with my teeth)

And we are here
each against one's wall -
and each wants to know
who is responsible
for this mess
Who made all this?
Who was insane to give us all this?
It was a mad God

or a meaningless universe – 

either way, there is no responsibility
You and I are agreed

Here we are
each against one's wall
considering who will eat who...
*Make your move; I am famished

5)
I know
once I was just like you
I was young and furious too
the world was too much
everyone made you feel
so hopeless, you think you could ****
I know exactly
how you feel

And now here we are -
I have come into your space, your cell;
gates and doors
yield to my fingers, if you must know
(always good with my hands,
good with my teeth)

And we are here
each against one's wall -
and each wants to know
who is responsible
for this mess
Who made all this?
Who was insane to give us all this?
It was a mad God
or a meaningless universe –
either way, there is no responsibility
You and I are agreed

Here we are
each against one's wall
considering who will eat who...
*Make your move; I am famished

4)
I moved into the woods
built a little cabin, below the rocks
and covered by the trees;
yet I had visitors
who had come astray into the wilderness

Someone wanting space for the night:
“Is there enough room in your cabin?”
“Why,” I said, “there’s plenty all round”
I was vegetarian
but the destitute offered themselves to me -
the religious might say: God fed me
even in the wilderness! Ha!

A wandering woman one evening,
she offered love in return
for shelter that night
She let me lick, taste her flesh
“Bite me,” she said
offering a foretaste in our foreplay
Why would they not leave me? –
these wanderers, the intruding world

No, I had not come in like Thoreau
or the Unabomber – but maybe
like the misanthrope Timon of Athens...
afraid of my own hate; but the innocent
seemed to be drawn in as to a...an...abattoir

WARNING*:  Horror...you might find this series offensive or distressing if you are not used to horror.

3)
I know
once I was just like you
I was young and furious too
the world was too much
everyone made you feel
so hopeless, you think you could ****
I know exactly
how you feel

Dear, oh dear
don't cry
Darling, oh darl
don't bleed
There was a time when I married
(everyone finds it's a mistake;
they either **** their partner
or, to continue living,
they **** their own spirit)
but I was determined to grow
my body and spirit -
can we not get conventional?* -
so I had minced pie for a time
and no one could bring
my wife back home
you see
wifey got
too comfy
and see she had this thing
(after respectability)
about responsibility
the role of husband and father and
parent and homeowner, mow the lawn
service the loan
and all that crap –
I quite believe she was going mad;
maybe she walked away into the woods
Was that responsible of her?
*Dear, oh dear
don't cry
Darling, oh darl
don't bleed

2
I know
once I was just like you
I was young and furious too
the world was too much
everyone made you feel
so hopeless, you think you could ****
I know exactly
how you feel

Like the time
then at work
the colleagues went on
about responsibility
and they conspired:
I was irresponsible;
they were conscientious;
I was a freeloader
Ah, the judges in one's world
the judges of one's soul

and one day
they found a worker in a bad state
dead and lying naked in the clichéd
pool of blood –
in the toilet, of all places -
with the words: “How irresponsible”
on the floor

Everyone was in a state -
I moved inter-state
I was going places

WARNING*:  *Horror...you might find this series offensive or distressing if you are not used to horror.
_________________­_


1)
I know
once I was just like you
I was young and furious too
the world was too much
everyone made you feel
so hopeless, you think you could ****
I know exactly
how you feel

Like the time
my parents kept on and on
about responsibility
I had to look after my things,
that made me mad

And then I decided
I must assure them
I would grow up to be responsible
make them feel confident
I must put them at ease
so I did

And the police asked me
if I knew where they'd gone
and I showed the cops my perplexity:
“They were always
responsible in everything -
how could they just go away
and leave me like this?”

The police and lawyers searched the house
and they found the will -
my parents had left everything to me
and had put my siblings
neat in order
stretched out on the dining table
in the basement kitchen

The preacher said
he was better
than the taxi-driver
because he showed
people, with all his words,
the way to Heaven

The taxi-driver said:
*"You might show them
the way to Heaven
but I show them the way
to God -
for everytime I start to drive
passengers start to pray
and they pray all the way
And I don't even have to say a word"

She’s riding her bike
the wind’s on her cheeks
and hair
She’s got no worries
no care, cause she’s
riding easy on her bike

Rachel comes on her bicycle
down the street and
she sways with a smile;
she can go steady or she
can show off, as she pleases,
on her happiness bike

off her bicycle
she loses her smile
she frowns, she does not talk
but O -
she’s a goddess, she’s Venus
she’s all radiance
when she’s on happiness bike

she’s in her red top today:
her ******* decent
but talkative;
her *** is composed -
and O, as always
Rachel is glowing
on her happiness bicycle
we know it all:
angels come on bicycles now

She’s riding her bike
the wind’s on her cheeks
and hair
She’s got no worries
no care, cause she’s
riding easy on her bike

so I tried again
to train my parrot,
this time more emphatically:
"Why don't you just
say what I say?
What, they never taught you
Repetition at Parrot School?"

and my parrot said:
*"What, they never taught you
Thinking at Human School?"

so I said to my parrot:
"Why don't you just
be like the other parrots
and repeat whatever I say?"

and my obstinate parrot said:
*"Why don't you just
be like the other owners
and say something worth repeating?"

my girlfriend moved in
but she left with a huff and a puff
when she realised the truth

the truth dawned on her
when she heard
the parrot repeat
after just two months:
"What's for dinner?
What's for dinner?
What's for dinner?"


she left; now it's just
me and my parrot again
and all my ****** parrot says now is:
*"**** you, parrot!
**** you, parrot!"

so  it was the weekend
and I had no dates
nobody invited me over
(I suppose because
I never invite anyone over)
and so I stayed home
and by Sunday night
my parrot was telling me:
"Shut up, you
****** parrot!
Shut up, you
****** parrot!"


*Oh shut up, you ****** parrot!

I'm not the talking type you know
(us men will understand;
the women have seen this
in their men)
and being the lonely bloke I am
I bought a parrot for company
and just two hours observing me
in my house
the parrot said to me:
*"We ought to talk more..."

yeah, that's just right
early in the morning
at the self-check out
while I'm waiting my turn
(I have reason to believe you don't see me)
you stop awhile stabbing items
on the screen
to dig your nose
and you have such relief and satisfaction
and then you  continue stabbing
you finish, you are on your way -
thanks a lot, it's now my turn

*You have a nice day, won't you?

1
Tom learned a trick
at the playground:
Just say to any adult
"I know your secret"
with a knowing air
and they'll pay you
to keep your mouth shut

2
so Tom said to Dad:
"Dad, I know your secret"
and Dad said: "Oh God!
Son,  don't tell your mom!"
And Dad gave Tom $10

then Tom said to Mom:
"Mom, I know your secret"
and Mom said: "Oh God!
Son, don't tell your Dad!"
And  Mom gave Tom $10

that evening when the priest visited
Tom said to him:
"I know your secret!"
And the priest answered:
"Goodness me, my son -
I never thought your mom would tell!
Whatever you do, my dear son,
don't tell your Dad!"
And the priest gave Tom $100
and promised more

so the Manager called in
a staff member
and he said:
"Tom, take this new guy
round the workplace
and smarten him up"

So Tom took me round
the office and then
we went to see the Secretary
and he said to her:
*"Do check my Department report
My language is perfect -
just  righten up my punctuation"

The Math teacher poses the question:
"There are 10 people
9 leave the room
How many people are left?"

And the student replies:
"1 people are left"

                                                         ­            **DOH!

How long do you reckon
it'll take you to read a book
say, of a thousand pages?

Well, it took the intellectual
six months to read, thinking
and considering every page and idea;
the writer took about five months
taking in the aptness and beauty
of each phrase and word;
the teacher took three months,
the librarian two and so did the reviewer -
*but the student,  the student did it in just one night,
just the night before the final exams...

Well, I was in this grand city
and was at this vast public park
the size, they said, of Versailles;
and I sat there having my sandwich
when I noticed these two men -
the one in front digging a hole
and moving on;
and the other behind filling up the hole
and moving up

and so they worked
(this energetic pair) -
one digging a hole and moving on
and the other filling it in and moving up
and round and round in the park
they went
and on and on

I could not stand it any longer
and I asked the men:
"What are you guys doing - digging
and filling? And digging and filling?"

"Oh, tell us about it!" said the men, spitting
*"The guy who puts in the plants
is on sick leave today
But surely you will agree -
the job's got to be done!"

so I got the job anyway
and came in to work
I think it was at 9.30 am
and the Manager called me
into his office
(what a nice guy, I thought,
giving me all the attention)

and he said: "You should have come in
to work at 8.30 am, mister"

"8.30am?"I asked...*"Why, what happened?"

I was at the interview
and it was the final moments,
I knew

and the Owner Manager
sat back in his seat
and he thought awhile and deep
and he looked me straight in the eye
and he said: "We need someone responsible.
Do you think you are that person?"

"Sure," I replied with confidence
*"In all the previous places where I worked
whenever something went wrong
people always pointed to me
as being the one responsible"

I have never been responsible
but my girlfriend said I was
I insisted I was not
and her father hired thugs
to beat me up
Isn't that funny? - the world beats
those who are responsible
and spares those who are not

You can languish here
in cyberspace's vastness
for all I care
I don't give a ****
if no one visits you or if they do;
if they gawk at you and shake
their heads and sneer and spit at you
or how many clicks and likes you get
and all that analytics and trending-now stuff

Look here, you vain self-centered Poems -
you've taken enough life out of me
coming at unexpected times
like malevolent spirits
hungry ghosts
like piranhas in feeding frenzy
and being so demanding
and wanting me, wanting, wanting
change me, change me
edit, edit, edit
Like some vain teenage ******* her first date
demanding the whole family
dress her for but an evening's glory
(or lifetime shame, who knows?)

I'm done and you're out
and it's your life out there, for all I care
If you have brains you'll get admirers
if you are spiritless, you'll get the flick


*You know, it was easier bringing up children
than bringing you to life and looking after you

Do elephants talk to each other?
of course they do -
they use an ele-phone
Well, they used to
(just like they used to make trunk calls)
now they use ele-mail

And like us, they send selfies:
the girls show themselves
naked in their mud bath;
and the boys rampaging through
what’s left of the forests

Elephants come in colors
in elephant parade
If it’s green, you wait till it ripens
If it’s blue, you cheer it up
If it’s red
it's just like you and I -
it's probably embarrassed

And if you’re wondering what
you’re standing under -
gray, big and protecting you from the rain –
*it's an umbrellaphant

I am so blessed you know
all my blessed life it's been so
I'm OK, my family is OK
God's chosen to bless me and mine
according to the Law of I Choose Who

I'm so blessed easy and cool:
like the other day, you know,
my neighbour was mocking me
(in spite of my perfect features)
and he was laughing as he crossed the streets
and a car knocked him down at Walk Street -
ha, God flattens mine enemies!

It is a life full of blessings you know -
there are people out there dying of hunger
and bloated tummies and explosions
and Ebola and such
but my family and I God has continued to protect
I am so blessed, I know -
it is a just God
(I am convinced)
who watches over me
Open your hearts
and blessings will pour
on you and your tribes too
There's the law of probability
and the sweep of randomness
- but hey, it's pleasing to know
me and mine are magnificently blessed

*How smooth and easy it is
I can smile at the world in peace and self-satisfaction

Mom told us Dad had been
a spoiled brat, dependent and
his parents never let him
do any work at home

so about a year after
they were married
Mom managed to send him off
to the shops with a shopping list
(yes, it took Mom a year
to persuade him to go alone to the shops)

And dad came back home
pleased with himself,
carrying:
1 bag of flour
2 bottles of sauce
3 boxes of corn flakes
4 bottles of milk
5 bags of sugar
6 bottles of olive oil
7 bottles of vinegar
and
8 bags of salt

Pious John speaks to God often
and noticing his neighbour
lives easy and has a wealthy life
Pious John whinges:
"You know what I don't understand...
I pray everyday and I speak to you often -
yet Atheist Jack my neighbour
has done well and has a better life...
Why?"

"Simple, John," comes God's reply
*"I prefer it when people
don't bother me much"

Little Kelly doesn't feel
like going to school today
and when mom and dad
are out early to work
Kelly calls the school office -
she knows the "pro-see-dears"

"Hello," says Little Kelly into the phone
"Please note Kelly Blunder is sick;
she will not come to school today"

"Oh, sure,"  says the polite Ms Swift
of the school office
"I will take note of that...
And who is that, please?"

"Oh," comes Kelly's swift reply
*"This is my mother"

Session 1
Greet people you meet;
smile and give 'em a Presidential wave



Session 2
Facilitator:
What  happened to you
Participant Jones?
Would you care to tell everyone?

Participant Jones:
This man at the mall
stepped up to me and punched me
Cause, he said, I was smiling at his woman

Facilitator:
Be undeterred, O participant Jones
Be persistent - practise positive behaviour

Session 3
Facilitator:
What's with that bandage on your head
O participant Jones?
Would you care to tell everyone?

Participant Jones:
That's where my wife's ladle landed
O positive Facilitator -
for my wife thinks I'm trying to get fresh
with the women in the neighbourhood
with my exuberant smiles and hand waves

Facilitator:
Have no regrets, practise in earnest;
the broad smile wins all hearts


Session  4**
Participant Jones did not attend;
has not been heard from since Session 3

Hey, celebrate the loser
not just the victor
it's OK that you don't always win
like the time
your little sister could find the answer
to a Year 10 math question
and you couldn't do it
though you were older

it's OK...to be a loser, not a winner always
like the time you argued and argued
and turned out you were wrong
but you just slipped away quietly
and you've suppressed it in your memory

it's OK if you don't have stories
to tell of your victories always
and how others were wrong
and you were right
or others have no principles and ethics
how you are the 90%winner
or everyone else is ******* the planet
it's OK to be the loser
and to celebrate the loser in you
and I don't say this
because of some liberating paradox like
winners start from being losers -
but simply it's OK to celebrate losing
just losing oneself in the loser
Have no other thought in the moment -
*it's OK to celebrate the loser

the last time
my long-suffering
paranoid wife
went to the dentist
she sat obediently
and when she could,
she grabbed what she could

and the dentist, always used to a
position of power, said with calm and dignity:
"Excuse me lady, you got me by my *****;
perhaps you want to take your hands off?"

"Well," said my fearful wife,
the timid victim
*"If  we all handle things easy
ain't nobody gonna hurt, okay"

I went to the dentist -
reluctantly, definitely -
and I closed my eyes and
I felt metal against my teeth
as the dentist probed my mouth
and then I heard his words:
"Oh what a deep cavity...
Deep cavity...
Deep cavity"

And I said timidly:
"Come on, doctor...you needn't repeat
those words - I'm frightened enough
just coming here"

"I wasn't repeating,"
said the dentist
precise  in his words
*"Those were echoes you heard"

read me literal, dear reader
please - for I never transcend
beyond the obvious
I am in the physical, embodied and whole
and so cannot go into things figurative
or metaphorical,
satirical, persona-cast, parodic or symbolic
Irony, I've always known, is some contraption
wrought by an ironsmith

and so to me, dear reader
"He's got the whole world in his hands"
is a ridiculous proposition, makes no sense;
and Isaac Newton was obviously
suffering from concussion
from the literal apple
that hit him ******* his head
when he extemporised:
"If I have seen further it is
by standing on the shoulders of giants."
Bah! Humbug! - a scientist and you believe in giants!
Come on Newton - you're nuts!  Stick to apples!

read me literal, dear reader -
so when I say my wife is an angel
I mean she's dead and she floats around me
making ****** sure I don't get hitched again
till I too become an angel, or fiend,
however it may come to pass;
and the guy who tells me: "Nice day, isn't it"
when it's raining cats and dogs
is obviously some crazy *******

I  did a gig last night
at the local bar - Moderation Inn,
they called it

and  I played the piano
late into the night -
the usual tunes, the usual crowd:
friends and lovers
people talking aloud
no one who drank in moderation;
couples dancing...when I noticed
an elephant in the corner
crying,  
and I said to the elephant
even as I continued playing:
"Recognise the tune?"

"No,"  said the elephant,
shaking its head
*"I recognise the ivory"

just a few days after Beethoven was buried
the local drunk heard
music over the composer's grave;
the priest came running
and he said a few prayers
and crossed the air and his chest;
the Mayor came running
and wondered if
this would be it: big dollars and tourism


and so they called for an expert in music
who listened with them
to the ninth Symphony being played
inside the grave
but backward;
and then each other symphony
from the eighth
to the first,
each played backward -
and then, duly composed, the guest expert
made his proclamation:
*There is nothing to worry
about this phenomenon
and this will end soon:
it is  merely Beethoven decomposing

this poem (joke-from-online-transformed-into-verse) is dedicated to everyone at HP...smile, and be happy always



"You know,"* said the sun
sending a flare out at the moon
"You're not a planet - a moon
is what you are...a little kid
in the system of things, that's
what you are"

"Look who's talking," replied the moon
*"If you're so big in the scheme of things
how come you can't come out nights?"

I have always wondered
- it's been a mystery to me from early -
about all these awesome bright people
but who then turn out not so smart

Well, I thought Science might shed some light
on my dilemma
and after six months' intensive study
I see what it is all about:
*light travels faster than sound
and that is why all these people
who look so bright
don't turn out  so smart
when the words they utter are heard

1
Dear Poet Friend at HP
(I don't know your name, as the name you use at HP is in a typo I can't decipher.)

* I welcome your question and comment as it gives me an opportunity to explore this issue of plagiarism. It will indeed be useful for everyone.

* This is my modus operandi: I take a joke from online and I convert it to poetry. The language is mine; I give the joke a context, even alter its spirit, create characters and by the time I'm finished with it, it is a new and original product.
If I took the words exactly as they are and passed them off as my own, then that is plagiarism. I never do that.
Plagiarism is taking another person's words and phrases and work and passing them off as one's own. That is not what my work is about.

* Take the example of Shakespeare. His "Julius Caesar" is actually based on various sources. So is his "Romeo and Juliet" and other plays like "Othello". Do we charge him with plagiarism ? No, as he has used his own language and puts each material from various sources into his own style. I have taken many jokes and I have put them in poetry, in my own style, in my own narrative. It shows a great lack of understanding of Literature to call that plagiarism.

* You might ask why I do not have a note at the end to indicate the poem is based on a joke found online. I used to do that (see my older poems) and decided for purely aesthetic reasons to keep notes to a minimum.

Kind regards
Raj Arumugam



2
Would it be fine with you if I posted your comment along with my reply as a separate post on my page? It will benefit everyone to consider this issue.
If you are not agreeable to my including your view in such a post, then I will simply post my reply possibly entitled "Reply on being charged with plagiarism".
Thank you

Kind regards
Raj Arumugam