The less
you
tried,
     the more
      I fell
      in
      love.

And that's
been the
story
thus
far.

such I fool, I am
it's hard to think about at times

I pulled into the parking lot
found the idea of you and
sped off like the fool I swore
to never be

you do this to me,
time and time again

but I think if I let myself
realize it, I'd realize I
missed you more than I
thought I never needed
you, dear. have mercy.
find compassion. release me.

but maybe you did
*******
because you couldn't get a
high
from loving me

hand in hand, we stood
under blossom trees, your palms
cold  with your fingers wrapped
around my own
dutiful, almost
you belong entangled with me
the wind carries a whisper
of our voices
pleading
let go now, let go, you're holding on too tight
but it feels like you're slipping away
through my clammy palms
your icy hands, numb but still
the pain remains
I can't let go
it doesn't feel like I have anything
left within you to hold onto
you're already gone

i saw the movie, once
- a sad one

this time i am hoping
things will be different -

good, friends
should be allowed
to be friends -

Viva Cuba.

r ~ 12/18/14

i am sitting on my back porch with you
more satisfied from your presence than
the nicotine between our fingers, and i'm
holding back laughter to hear yours first
because it's cold out and the sound of it
puts the warmth back into the air and
i can breathe again.

until your leg brushes against mine
then pulls back faster than i could notice
it was even there in the first place

the space between our bodies is a purgatory