Nov 2014
Raindrops hit my windowsill
I have screaming in both of my ears
I'm somewhere between wide awake and passed out
I am unblinking up at my ceiling
I forgot to how to feel
My mouth is slack and my eyes glass
My hands couldn't get a grip for the life of me
I'm surround by containers
My thoughts have stopped pounding
I can't remember what I wanted to forget
I'm sure that this is safety
I've never known anything more secure than this poison
I know that it's better than my own toxicity
I have my blade in my right hand ready when needed
I am used to needing to bleed just to double check
I'm not always sure I'm still alive
I hate myself for choosing this state over pain -- but
I don't want to come to my senses
I can tell it's already starting to wear off
I can hear from somewhere distantly close
Raindrops hit my windowsill
I have screaming in both of my ears
I'm somewhere between wide awake and passed out
I am unblinking up at my ceiling
I forgot to how to feel
My mouth is slack and my eyes glass
My hands couldn't get a grip for the life of me
I'm surround by containers
My thoughts have stopped pounding
I can't remember what I wanted to forget
I'm sure that this is safety
I've never known anything more secure than this poison
I know that it's better than my own toxicity
I have my blade in my right hand ready when needed
I am used to needing to bleed just to double check
I'm not always sure I'm still alive
I hate myself for choosing this state over pain -- but
I don't want to come to my senses
I can tell it's already starting to wear off
I can hear from somewhere distantly close
Raindrops hit my windowsill
I wish they'd hit my skin.
