my eyes light up like the star on top of a christmas tree
then the glimmer goes away
and blends back into the green of the tree
when I remember
you always walk past me

it seems like every effort fails
that no matter what brand of makeup I wear
I’ll always look like a whale

not in the fat sense
but in the I choke on my words and spit them out kind
that I’m made of rubber and every person who comes into my life
slides right off