Numbness
Its my companion
Feelings are unnecessary

So why would I give you leverage
I can break my own heart
I'm actually quite good at it

I've done it for years
So I can recover from myself

I've never had someone else break it
I never let people
I run them off before that's an option

I have a two month max
and I like being numb after
My face
I cant feel it smile
and I cant force tears

Liquor was my saving grace
but you
You have ruined it all

I want to run
but im so numb with feeling
I cant move my feet
I try to break my heart daily
because of you

I cant bring myself
out of the rut you've put me in
I smile whenever you are around
but hurt with miles between
I cant stand it

But I think I adore you
I want you to give me a reason to run
but you don't
you wont let me break my heart
I should have ran as soon as I saw you
but I want to feel something
anything

and now I do
its so foreign
a numbing tingle
you have awoken my heart
and it yearns daily

I'm so used to not feeling
you make me feel and I cant handle it
I want you to make me numb
but yet I want you to stay
because I feel...
I don't want to go back
to being numb,
to heartbreak that doesn't hurt
I want you
you make my bones ache
you make my heart burn

so don't leave
you would break me