I hate this feeling.
I hate that you, of all people dearest to me, have brought it upon me.
I hate never knowing if we're up or down.
I feel as if you've poisoned our relationship,
And by poisoning our relationship, you've let the poison drip through my veins
I can feel it coursing through my blood.
It's a curse that in the past, I would have thought only you could lift.
Telling me that everything was going to be fine.
But now, I'm finally seeing how much bad you've done to me.
How much bad I've done to myself.
Once I thought you were the most stable position in my life,
Always there for me to lean on.
Now I realize I can only lean on myself.
That's what love does, it chokes you.
It leaves you gasping for air.
Now and then you can get high on the loss of oxygen,
But wait too long and you'll die.