hi my name is broken and i once caught my father using all his teeth hands lip and tongue on a woman that was not his own outside my bedroom window, i spent the night trying to convince myself that love is real love is real love is real because after that i wasn’t ever really sure.
hi my name is survivor and i was once a punching bag for my stepfathers anger and houses in the country will forever terrify me all because of a random man and his prying fingers and his sticky gum, and then there’s this third set of bones and dark flesh that made me so afraid of my own skin i had to tell myself i am beautiful i am beautiful i am beautiful because hate and death wasn’t my only option.
hi my name is butterfly and i once broke every bone in my body falling so hard for a girl with the loveliest voice i’ve ever heard but she had other bodies underneath her thick brown belt she wouldn’t let herself feel all the things i felt, i spent thanksgiving in a mental hospital chanting over and over i am lovable i am lovable i am lovable because without even trying, she had managed to convince me that i wasn’t.
hi my name is destroyer and i chose water over blood because blood burned and drowned and buried me ten feet down all at the same time and i didn’t want to die because of them anymore i split in half all the walls and windows and doors to my home, i needed to do and be what was best for me so i told myself again and again i’m not alone i’m not alone i’m not alone because all i felt was the aftermath of being the very thing that broke up my home.
hi my name is lover and i tend to give too much of me way too quickly because i don't fall in love, i dive with feet facing the sky, head towards the concrete and i wonder how i end up being so broken and incomplete so i wound up all the glue and all the tape, i muttered over and over in between each breath fate isn't fake fate isn't fake fate isn't fake because my heart always seemed to pound a few beats behind, a few beats too late.
hi my name is suicide and i stepped in front of trains and bullets and knives and i hate yous and you’re nothings all looking for a father that never really wanted me he broke my throne, i cut more than just my hair, i no longer want to be here, and i screamed at the top of my lungs because it’s worth it it’s worth it it’s worth it it just doesn’t feel like it anymore.
it's been such a long time, i don't feel the same.