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Nights like this I question my worth
Just up at night asking my demons why
Am I worth it
My am I nobody’s perfect
I tell myself I’m more than enough
Yet I can’t quell the feeling I’m not good enough
I hide behind a tough veil
And all I feel I ever do is fail
But back to my demons
With my back against the glass wall of my ego
Why am I not enough
I’m a lot of things but I never seem to be enough
You ever try to block it out
But it’s not enough
Your not as tough as you wish you were
Your not as handsome as you could be
Your not stuffing this back to the recesses of your mind
It’s kinda said this is what you think at 2am
You lay there and cry
Even that’s not enough
Your pathetic
Is this the pathetic thing to think
All your weak thoughts seem to reach the brink
And all you can ponder is your not good enough
Disgusted by your weak thoughts
Only to be disgusted by yourself
Where the **** is your mental health
Where’s that wealth of knowledge
As you stand on a mental ledge
You jump and plummet into the sea of dark thoughts
Unable to see the summit
You sink into the sea of thought
As deep as it is Dark
Seems no light can peak through to you
You were never Enough
Dom McDo Sep 17
Yo I’m tired
Like you don’t even know
I’m tired of walking on egg shells
Seems like I’m walking through hell
Got the world telling me “No”
You can’t do this
Don’t do that
Man idk I thought this was my life
I was taught coming up “ All I gotta do is be black and Die”
And I can’t even lie it’s 2020
And that not even true no more
Seems everywhere I go it’s another closed Door
“Do it this way”
“No that’s not the right way “
So many saying “ do it that way”
I feel like I’m losing my way
**** the standards
**** being understood
If I gotta tuck myself away
What do I have left
A Name , A number
I’m left out like a barcode
Everyday in the system I’m just that a Number
Yet as a Blackman
I walk on eggshells
Man is it gonna be today
Or tomorrow
Some days it feels like I’m on time borrowed
In a way I feel like you supposed
To be quintessential
But I suppose Right now it’s a struggle to be essential
Dom McDo Sep 10
What’s up
Lil buttercup
How’ve you been
What you been up to
Never know this how we’d end up
It’s been a minute for me at least
You were my cup of tea
So what’s tea
How you feeling bout me
Since you’ve been without me
This ain’t even about me
I just hope you see I been miss you
Those beautiful brown eyes
Yeah I’m think bout you
Social media tell me lies
Since I’ve been less social with you
Seem like the stars don’t shine without you
Just think back say we were meant to be
Funny how we had it under lock and key
Coupd up in the house on sum locked up ****
Sun don’t hit the same since you went missing
Bottom line “I miss you “
You told me then that communication was the issue
No longer going on bae-cations with you
Absence makes the heart grow
And your absence has only started to make my feelings grow stronger
You told me then that communication was the issue
No longer going on bae-cations with you
Absence makes the heart grow
And your absence has only started to make my feelings grow stronger
We grew further and further apart
I was starting to think you blocked me
Part of what I’m saying is Do you still think about me ?
Like I think about you
I been feeling blue
Since our last link
Think I really caught feelings
Who knew
We all have that someone we miss
Dom McDo Aug 25
There’s a little boy
He reminds me of the boy in me
Such a happy smile a joy to see
The first boy is my Son
And that boy wants to be like me
He reminds me of myself
Before Soo much pain won my heart over
As I look over I’m reminded of what I want to protect
But I see myself as the future I reject for him
I want him to have a future where he’s happy
Yet now he looks at me
Happy as can be
He wants to be all that is me
All I want is to be the best for them
Especially when I look at him and see the wrong in me
Not too long ago i was just like him
But some things hurt and I couldn’t let go
At this point I know I have to do better
He looks at me and see’s a future a goal
I look at him and see the past a role
I once held
Once again looking in this mirror
The future and past meld
Dom McDo Aug 22
Let me show you true despair
A candle that’s refuses to lit the air
No light shown on this soul
Whom these depths of the abyss
Have claimed
One whose long lost all meaning of a name
The dark child
Groomed in the shadows of the wild
It’s not my style but I could rip open my chest and show you a dead heart
Yet this corpse still moves by a dead art
If suicide was an art
Then I’m it’s artist
A pen draped in all black
Contrary to what you might think
My dead blood is the ink
As this darkness flood for in me
It’s clear that light in me is gone
I stared long enough and the abyss has claimed me
Hope, love, emotion all gone
This ocean of darkness has claimed me
But I’m the one who maimed me
Here hold this dead heart
It’s cold but is still a heart
And that’s why I can’t hold on to it
At this point I’m just a demon of the abyss
And I embrace its dark kiss
And this is just the beginning
Beginning of the ending
Death is a gift
After all this pain was lifted
I welcome you to Despair
Nihility is what I’m guilty of
Welcome to emptiness
It’s not hard to guess but I could care less
I gave it all away
So In this abyss I shall stay
para la eternidad
para la eternidad
Si para la eternidad
Eternally Done yet undone
Dom McDo Aug 22
I’m hurt
You hurt me
I’ve hurt you before too
You were my everything
Yet I felt like nothing
My queen who didn’t acknowledge her king
You wanted to push me
And you pushed me
Pushed me away
I needed an extended stay away
From the pain the hurt the drama
Hearing your name
And Your to blame
I Needed 3 months away
And even then I couldn’t fully get away
Feelings dwelled and subsided
So I dwelled in them for awhile
All the while trying to forget
Forget you
Forget my pain
Forget your name
Soo much so that I treated you like a stranger
And even stranger still
I can’t escape the way you make me feel
This might be too real but here’s the deal
I Love You
I Hate You
I Missed You
I Can’t forget you
But You Hurt Me
All I want is to make it clear
I was hurt so I couldn’t be near
Not near My Love
My Best Friend
My SoulMate
All the Same Person
My Person
Personally My Heart Was Is Broken
And I Hate That your the only one who can Fix It
But Your Hurt Too
My Absence Affected you
While it was unforeseen
It wasn’t done to be Mean or outta spite
Where’s the Abstract
To this Cycle we’ve started
Down the wrong Track
Dom McDo Aug 22
Peace of mind
Piece of mine
I can’t even sleep I’m dying
All the things we’ve said in time
Couple words mean nothing
I can’t tell if your lying
Is it all just a bluff then
I’m trying but it’s sad I need to question
Even worse when old feeling erupted
And now my life’s disrupted
All I want is some peace of mind
Can I get some peace of mind
Maybe give you a piece of mine
No cap I got allot on mine
Feels like I’m lost in time
Can I speak my mind
I’m talking can I open up in a deep convo
And maybe Then you can understand Domo
I’m trying but I’m dying for some
Even just a little Peace if mind for Dom
I’m feeling disconnected
Unable to reel in on myself
Like I’m losing my mind
Give me some peace
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