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Elizabeth Foley
Poems
Apr 2018
Dysphoria
You came ‘round when I needed you
For that I owe you much
Your loving words caressed me
When we were much too far to touch
I find comfort in your presence
And solace in your arms
So the last thing I would want to do
Is bring you any harm
But you knew I came with baggage
You knew my sorrow was immense
You knew the risk of loving me-
-In my terrible defense
Please don’t think I never loved you
Please don’t try to curse my name
Don’t perjure yourself into believing
That I didn’t feel the same
I meant each aching syllable
I meant it to my core
Imagine my dejection finding
We could not be anymore
I promise that it’s harder
To say no to someone’s love
When that someone is the person
That you think so highly of
You jumped in while I was drowning
You wiped away my tears
And a small part of me dies
As I evince your deepest fears
I’m who I am because
You took the time to care for me
You listened and you carried a
Portion of my misery
Please know, while I was dying,
So slowly bleeding out,
You plugged the wound so gently
Washing away my rotting doubt
And though you may feel gutted
At this thought of life apart
I’ll extirpate myself before
I fully break your heart
For a brief and lovely moment
Our souls were quite aligned
But matching us is simple proof
Cupid indeed is blind
For at the core we differ
We match like fire matches ice
It took too long for me to realize this
And for that, you pay the price
Apologies mean nothing
If you can’t act out remorse
You’ll want nothing of me
And proscribe me at the source
I’ll be banished, gone forever,
From your mind, and heart, and soul
Until you find the person
That can plug your newfound hole
Hearts never quite recover
From a love that has been lost
So the mind begins to wonder
If it’s really worth the cost
Perhaps the one we find shares
Some same love induced defects
Perhaps the bond forms over
The many love stories we’ve wrecked
But to the point, I’m sorry
Sorry that I’ve let you down
So sad to give back to the world
The wonderful man that I have found
You’ll stay with me forever
My heart branded by your eyes
Thinking of what could have been
With discontented sighs
What could have been will never be
I think this we both know
It’s the hardest thing I’ll ever do-
Watching you permanently go
My heart brakes while I write this
Tears falling down my chin
As the scar painfully rips away
And I feel the bleeding rebegin
#love
#pain
#forever
#breakup
#lost
#sadness
#depression
#bleeding
#wound
#souls
Written by
Elizabeth Foley
25/F
(25/F)
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