My past was always blurred,
From when I was a child
All I knew from others was
I was angry, reckless, wild

I've recently learned the truth,
My eyes are growing wide
As the barrier within becomes
More a longer, broad divide

How do I love my parents
When two were not mine?
The other two were always gone
And this barrier just won't die

Biology didn't dictate
That she would ever try
When depression caught and set in
All she saw was failure, alive

Behind closed doors, physical
Or within her mind
She shut herself from me
From the world, alone she cried

But I cannot forgive
You were supposed to be there for me
Too young to understand her marriage
Didn't stop her cheating

Step Father didn't do much,
Believes her every lie
Made it the world of his past
But neither did he try

Father on deployment,
So the connection isn't there
I see it as a friendship
And it is too heavy to bear

Step Mother was a saint,
Made me fit again
But I have no love for her
Just respected as a friend

It's a hole deep inside of me
Like acid to my heart
My mother never tried,
And that tears me apart

Feeling so unloved, alone,
In sorrow
And although I have three houses
Not one of them is home.